Teen Pregnancy

^And neither are generalisations, like the fact that apparently all teenage parents rely heavily on their parents.

Mindfuck:

^And neither are generalisations, like the fact that apparently all teenage parents rely heavily on their parents.

...Which I did not even say. I said that more of them do than do adults, and that way fewer adults do so than previously stated. In fact, I was merely CORRECTING a previous generalization. I didn't even say anything specifically about teens relying on parents, but simply spoke of the trials on teens having to try to even work enough to support a child and raise it when legally they are not allowed to. So tell me where my generalization is? I am correcting a ridiculous statement.

merlin.:

So tell me where my generalization is? I am correcting a ridiculous statement.

There was this one:

merlin.:

But they are still MUCH more capable of taking care of a child independently than someone who is still legally considered a child.

To me that implied that teenage parents aren't capable of taking care if a child like someone older is, and I took issue with it because it sounded like you were saying all teen parents are not capable and need to rely heavily on others.

And also this:

merlin.:

Relying on parents to help look after their grandkids while you work a 40+ hour week is not at all the same as making your parents more or less raise your child because you haven't the slightest damn clue how to even begin.

To me, that implied that you thought teenage parents made their parents practically raise their children for them.

That's just how I saw it.

merlin.:

The statement that a 20-30-something WILL depend on their parents AS MUCH AS a teen parent is even MORE generalized and can only come from the mouth of inexperience with the world.

I really apologize for bumping this thread, but I took a bit of offense to this and have only just seen it.

My mother was a teen parent, who had already attained her GED. My father and her married when she was a few months pregnant. She went on to raise not only my older sister, but my older brother and myself, all while owning her own daycare center. Although she didn't have the chance to earn a college degree until I was 9 or 10, she still managed to raise us all well, even when she became a single parent when I was 4.
So you may have *5* years of "experience" more than me in the world, but I don't appreciate the fact that you decided it would be okay to make that dig.
When my older sister was born, my grandmother was a recovering drug addict and was the only grandparent around, so you could say my mom didn't depend on everyone around her to look after the child that was conceived at such a "naive and irresponsible" age.

Lights:

merlin.:

The statement that a 20-30-something WILL depend on their parents AS MUCH AS a teen parent is even MORE generalized and can only come from the mouth of inexperience with the world.

I really apologize for bumping this thread, but I took a bit of offense to this and have only just seen it.

My mother was a teen parent, who had already attained her GED. My father and her married when she was a few months pregnant. She went on to raise not only my older sister, but my older brother and myself, all while owning her own daycare center. Although she didn't have the chance to earn a college degree until I was 9 or 10, she still managed to raise us all well, even when she became a single parent when I was 4.
So you may have *5* years of "experience" more than me in the world, but I don't appreciate the fact that you decided it would be okay to make that dig.
When my older sister was born, my grandmother was a recovering drug addict and was the only grandparent around, so you could say my mom didn't depend on everyone around her to look after the child that was conceived at such a "naive and irresponsible" age.

I agree with you to be honest.
I havnt checked up on this thread for a while and thats ridiculous.
My friendand my mother,proberly half the people i know are doing it alone.

My dad was a drug addict,he beat my mother,her mother had nothing to do with us at the time.
She didnt turn to her dad,she didnt turn to her friends.
She lived her life,got babysitters when she needed to let loose,and me and my sister turned out just fine.
So what,she didnt get her gcses,shes still got a job and provides for us and has done her whole life.
She went out of her own way to get extra christmas presents,shes currently working her fingers to the bone to pay our bills and none of her parents are around.
Infact ones in greece and one is terminally ill.
Shes never asked them for money,theyve never taken care of us and my mum was on her own. She has been since i was a baby.

Not all teens rely on thier family.

Alexface.:

I was thinking about this the other day and debating to myself how we solve the problem of teen pregnancies in the UK (we have the highest rate in the whole of Western Europe). I definitely don't think it's anything to do with the age of consent, or how early kids are taught about stuff. Netherlands or somewhere like that have a really low age of consent and barely any teen pregnancies, so the law is clearly not the issue. And our government is lowering and lowering the age at which children are given sex education, which is not working, evidently. In the end I never really came to a conclusion. xD

I think it's the society mindset. We have contraceptives readily available for FREE and yet people will still get unwillingly pregnant at young ages. I've seen people trying to get pregnant young so they can get council housing. It's sad.

(The pill is free, and you can get condoms for free too, people just don't. If you're interested most areas have some version of this)

But not every teenager is like that,and thats the problem.
Theres constant press over teenagers being bad mums and dads.

Sometimes,yes.
Most of the time,no.

Even if accidental,it doesnt mean that person isnt capable of loving the child and raising it.

Well tbh through all of this the same factors keep coming up.

Money
Education
Family
Weather the fathers around
Religeon
Contreception

If i had a child at the age i am now,and im only sixteen,i wouldnt expect the father to stay around. Id expect him to pay some money to his child.
I would not rely on my family,im very independant,and if i decided to have a child it would be my choice.My money is low as i currently dont have a job,and soon all i will get is EMA unless i find one.My education is still important to me,i would carry on to college,and considering ive nearly done my gcses it wouldnt be an issue.
Im using two types of contreception,so its something ive already thought about.

But then again,my friend also used two types of contreception.
She was called a slag,a whore,etc.
And she sent a lovely myspace blog out,pointing out the fact that she was going to go ahead with the prgnancy,and at least she used contreception.
Although her child was an accident she is now a loving,caring and devoted mother.
Both my friends that have had babys this year,do not rely on thier families.


But i agree with the above,alot of the time teenagers just run around having sex with whoever they want,not caring for the consequences,i refuse to acossiate with these kind of girls.

Ive seen quite a few girls at the abortion clinic here,and all that goes through my head is have you woken up yet.

Personally i dont believe in religeon,i think that should be pressed on by the family rather than school.

my_rejected_romance:

Even if accidental,it doesnt mean that person isnt capable of loving the child and raising it.

No, but it can cause havoc when they're still in school. Do they finish their education so that they have a better chance of getting a good job to pay for themselves and the child? Or do they drop out so that they can actually spend time with the child, but then have poorer chances of getting good work?

My Immortal.:

Maybe along side educating children about sex and stuff, maybe teachers could even bring religion into it. And shouldn't younger kids be taught to value their morals? Cause even people who are not religious have morals. And these days it seems like children/teenagers don't even have any idea about what that is. And you can't argue about morals being wrong.

Why would you bring religion into it? Not everyone is religious, and people who are religious do not all have the same religion, therefore they are not all taught the same values and morals and things about sex.

Sex education needs to be as factual as possible, and it needs to be presented in a non-religious, non-biased, non-threatening way. Students need information (the correct information, not abstinence-only, and no sugar coating sex) on sex, sexual health and sexual relationships. If you bring religion into it, it muddies it somewhat because "religion" is not fixed for everybody.

Alexface.:

my_rejected_romance:

Even if accidental,it doesnt mean that person isnt capable of loving the child and raising it.

No, but it can cause havoc when they're still in school. Do they finish their education so that they have a better chance of getting a good job to pay for themselves and the child? Or do they drop out so that they can actually spend time with the child, but then have poorer chances of getting good work?

BUt its quite easy to get day care or a baby sitter throughout the day,the school could even have her homeschooled or make a time table that suits her.

^I don't know where you live, but over here daycare is really expensive, generally. And if it's a newborn, then generally the parent(s) want to bond with it - not just leave it everyday for someone else to look after.

What one of my friends in high school did was drop out when she became pregnant at 16, left for a while to care for her baby (as a single mother) then when it was a toddler she started studying part time at TAFE and eventually got certificates. Now she studies at university, because the TAFE courses she did after dropping out gave her credit to get into uni, so she didn't need to complete high-schooling to 'get somewhere' in terms of education.

I'm not suggesting all teenage parents do this, because everyone has different circumstances and means of support, but I don't get the thinking that the teenager's life will be ruined because it will interrupt schooling. School, as a matter of fact, can wait. Generally, schools accept 'mature' age students, or if education is very important to the individual, there are other means of getting a higher education after your high schooling was interrupted. Universities and colleges accept mature age students, and if they didn't complete high school then they sit some kind of test.

So even if they cannot finish their schooling at that very moment because they've decided to keep a baby, it isn't the end of the world. Life goes on, you get over it, and you find another way of doing it. If you really want it.

^^^ Your right.
You can always go back to college or university at any time and study the subjects you want.
Your at school by law,it doesnt mean you have to complete your schooling at that time however.

Im aware,im currently doing it as a matter of fact.

For instance,you have to do at least one of each of your lessons each week.

But there are ways around education,laws can be bent.