Your Songs/Lyrics

I'm sorry your friend is still mad at you.
I love the new song and the stressed tone to it. You're really talented at writing lyrics :]

Congratulations, I Hate You.

Take off that mask of yours
Rip out all your shallow thoughts
Everyone thinks you can be saved
But do they know
You're never gonna give a damn
Will we now ever salute you in your grave?
Do you even deserve it. You look pretty
....Awkward. Ha! You still think?

Are your insides as pretty
Or even worse
Your sadistic dream bubble
Just seconds ago burst
Atlast I have me to myslef.

And as you bury yourself alive
Take some pesticide along, Actually no
The poor thing'll have to work overtime
Of needles and sharp objects...
Am I not the worst?
Were you always this fake
I'm yet to know why I fell for you
Well, yet you can give me a chance
But "No, not you, Friends value more!!"
Haha! Kid someone else you kinky slob!

Could I see ypur insides
Are they the same pretty
OR even worse
Your sadistic dream bubble
seconds ago burst! X2

Yeah, Yeah..I do have a black suit
Do I really have to give the shit talk?
Well even over your grave, I'm showing no respite
Did you know there's this word called contrition?
And reprecussion?
No, I guess
No, no wait. I know!

I wanna see what your insides look like I'm sure they're not pretty on the inside X3

Bababababa..(fades)

Rest In Peace

Run away from this shallow place
Happier there than ever before
Hell, yeah! You like sleeping anyway
But yeah, We are kinda upset
Bout you not coming back again
To grace us with your stupid jokes
Don't worry, won't be no slack seen
We'll complete what you wanted to do
And, yeah by the way remebrance isnt just for a few

Well whose this god person anyway?
God say : "I won't prove my existence
Coz' there's no me without faiith"
But taking you away was proof enough
So, by his own arguement
With a poof! he vanishes

Life is so empty, It's difficult you know
Because of you our heart is now bleeding
The scar is too hard to bear
Waiting for the guilt to be liquid
To carry us with all our regrets
Atleast I won't shed another tear
Coz' now, I realise you're nearer than before

No dottie, not heaven
It don't exist
You just rest in peace for eternity
While we get stuck in this harsh reality..

You, The Venom & I

My words will never be enough
Not that I want them to be anymore
But before we go
Wherever my new self takes us
I wanted to say I'll remeber you

Coz' it's you why I am what I've become
And I love it better here than in the chacnceless land
And as I go I wanted to tell you
Thank you for the venom..

What do we relate to Pyridine, happiness now obviously
Drunk & step over by my ownself, commanding a solution
Do you not ever feel for what you did, NO conscience or what?

Now as I lay on the floor
Bleeding and kneeling before what I ingnored
I realise it wasn't worth what alll I lost
There is still a lot of time you still owe
But I did learns something from you
So, Thank you for the venom..

So, is the door now always closed?
Am I yet strong enough to let you go
You say you liked me better before
But do I really deserve to go through it again?
And as I dig up my old bones
I hope not you of all, over again
Whatever happened to the life I owned
And as these living dead bloodsuckers walk the Earth
Trying to get hold of my miserable soul

Godd-bye for the millionth time
This time I hope it's to stay
And now take my
Thank you for the Venom

Thank you for the venom!!
Thank you for the venom....(fades)

Potentially Potent

You can hide it from yourself, baby
But who are you trying to fool
And isn’t that denying the truth
Place it in a dark corner on the side of the room
And in the darkness compressed the fume
How about accepting them and giving them a chance to prove
That this is what you needed a bit more soon
And as your black feeling for him resume
While mine feel trodden upon
Give them respite and screw your groom! Hahahaha!

It’s just that I don’t say it all out
But I don’t know how
And as they from inside shout out
No matter how much I get reprimanded for loving you!

And baby the way you profusely use
My feelings, aint that abuse?
Ha, just kidding don’t let it loose
Coz’ if I know you well enough
You’ll turn around and say “SCREW YOU!”
Even if I proffer I shall be refused
Am I not that most pitiable fool?
Everything like always is platonic
So no use is my muse.

Baby, it’s just that I don’t blabber it out
If I’m not, everyone around me is a know how
Don’t you understand, watch my face pout!
Have you have any idea how poignant it is loving you!

I see your heart in black hands
It slowly tears me from inside
Tell me baby, is it worth a fight?
Or will it be better if I die…

Do I Not Look Pretty In The Coffin?

Haha! I’m gone forever now
So how does it feel not be loved no more
Come forth, in all you glory
Relate the story wearing that black dress you own
Don’t lie or hide over my grave
Where were could when I could be saved
Huh? Vocal chords down now?
What’s with that frown now?
I did enough to earn the halo
Does me dead make you mellow, girl?

Even if a genie chanced upon you bearing the wishes
I won’t be coming back; I’ll still sleep with the fishes
Isn’t there more important stuff in your life?
The whole world wanting to make you their wife
But the Ass has already taken your life

Don’t I look better in the wood?
Markers graffiting where I once stood
You are the last person who would
Drop flowers on the coffin when you could

What say about the mess you’ve made?
You care? Then you’ve got the whole firing squad to slay
The one to give the order, start with yourself
You’ll be hanged as a trophy next to the shelf
Happy? Or do demand more respect
Fine! They’ll lay you next to me. Isn’t that the best!

Dried flowers lie on my grave, too good?
If you can’t then sure I would
Dig a path to your grave for another look
Stare at that beautiful face dead!

Alive or Dead It’s the Same Thing

I’ve held on too long
Still it’s far from what I deserve
Through the rise and fall I’ve been there all along
Time & time again I sacrifice
What to me should have belonged?
If it stays like this forever
What the fuck is this life for?

I’m just a slave to my crave
Am just too above from what they say
And as my love on a platter lay
To be refused once again

Cyanide flowing through my veins
And as it reaches my heart
For the last time could I see your pretty face
Ephedrine rushing to the centre
Crying out in vain
“Take it out or just wear pretty lace”

And when I’m gone you’ll be a contusion on my grave
The funeral jag I wish for you to come along not lag
Behind, we’d be together forever
Dead better than asleep ever, my love
Alive I never had a trust
I’ll never make you cry now, fill another cup with that liquid
You screeched “You aint no friend of mine!
For what you’ve done got to pay the price!
So let me be and go die..”

I’ve been naïve to what you say
It ends with me having to go away
And for my dying wish
How about washing my lips away.

Cyanide flowing through my veins
And as it reaches my heart
For the last time could I see your pretty face
Ephedrine rushing to the centre
Crying out in vain
“Take it out or just wear pretty lace” [X2]

Still don’t get it? I love you more every time
Now leave me alone so I can sleep and die, die ,die…(fades)

Revenge is a deathwish

All the scars of my past are burned into my mind and I can't seem to erase the hurt that they've done. Hopefully, in the end I’ll see, that revenge just isn't for me but until that day I'm wondering, is there anyone out there like me?! I'm blinded by fear, I’m drowning in lies and tears, can they see, I’m just a fake. I've tried seeing from your point of view but I can seem to reach where you do, I can't seem to speak for myself, raised wrong, yet its almost okay, and I know one day, it'll be alright, I know its alright...I see a dream, I want to reach it but my claws can't grasp it all, pushed down, shoved around, tired of everybody else’s thought...I want to go where I want to go, I’m going to do what I want to do, I’m going to be free and you can't stop me, I want to live before I die...Breathe...before its to late, I’m going to live, I’m going to show you, I’ll do this on my own, I don't need your help so go away! I'm forced, to do what you say, 24 hours left before the next day, just want to sleep...can't eat, can't see, revenge is going to be the death of me! Why can't you see me? Why am I lost? What can I do? Oh what can I do? To make you....Make you know, what I know? And can't you believe what I do? What I say? I know...I know I’m a lie! Whoa oh whoa oh oh whoa oh, why do I feel...so cold? Why can't the rain stop now? It never rains, it only pours and I’m under pressure can't you see I’m trying? I just want you to know, I love you and I won't let go! I might want to run away, I might want to lock myself in my room and blare metal rock...I just want to be gone but I won't stop holding on and sadly, my scars, won't heal...my scars, there sealed to me, the scars, they burn, I don't care, I don't care, I don't care anymore, my scars are your fault yet....I'm somewhat thankful for all you've done, I’m afraid...this is the end. I can’t seem to be what you want but that’s okay because I’m imperfect and I wish you’d know that I can’t face death alone.

sorry that it's typed weird

oh wow lol so many lyrics! X]
the fatality: as you already know i adore those lyrics so much and i was really blown away by your talent. Just amazing! X]
Tanmayesh: I have read through your lyrics and although some parts are very creative and i feel are great work, i think you need to find a little more of your own originality. it's great that mcr have inspired your songs but it's better not to be using exact phrases from their songs in your own lyrics but to find your own style.
tastexofxink12: i love the message in your lyrics and the way you put forth the thoughts of what the person goes through so clearly. great work and also welcome to ino! feel free to introduce yourself in the noob thread, everybody here is really friendly :]

Thank you for your advice. I myself don't think much of my songs. I just like Don't I Look Pretty In The Coffin.

Holy shit, lotta lyrics!!!!

Well, I'm sorry I'm being EXTREMELY lazy right now and I haven't been on in a while. So, I'm just going to keep it general because you are simply all FUCKIN AMAZING LYRICISTS!!!

You all have so much creativity, imagination, and emotion in every line and every song! I admire each and every one of you SOOO much! I'm sorry I can't say too much or give advice and stuff, but I will go on more often, I've just been carried away with Swim Team and such...Sorry again! You are all amazingly coolio!!!!

I'm extremely new at this so please give me some advice or whatever

Stay Away

You say common sense
Beats my thinking process
But without you
I feel so powerless
There’s nothing like magic on my tongue
When a storm is in my head
Shouldn’t I wait for the storm to pass
Before I perfect my words instead?
You say a broken rose is better than none
This heart cannot mend until you’re gone

Stay away
Make broken promises into yesterday
You can’t fix what’s broken anyway
Don’t listen to what I say
Because it’s not me anyway
So stay away

Knives in my skull
Destroy my memories
You say they’re only plastic
But you’re not the one who feels the pain
I’ll close you out
I feel the fog
Around my head and into my brain

I actually think that's very good for a beginner! Very good!
Here's some advice:
Maybe make your lyric writing more unique! Have your own kind of style to it. You have some lines that are common in songs - maybe change them around or make it weirdly unique.
The chorus is all rhymed. Try not too always have a forced rhyme or have everything rhyme. Then it doesn't grab too much attention, but i do like the chorus.

Very good start though! I can't wait to see more writing of yours!

I agree with Black Presicion about the forced rhyming thing, because not every line has to rhyme with the next. but other than that it's a great first start! The chorus is really good but maybe add some diversity in the rhyme scheme.
Also I think my favorite part was the second verse because of the unique creativity in it :]

All right, thanks for the advice! I'll see what I can do...

Oh WOW!!! I love your lyrics! It has so much emotion! I can tell what you're saying too and I love how you align the lyrics if you know what I mean. Like instead of one shame you put three and you put "masks can break and you are just a fake". Very unique - I love it!

If you need a title you can call it:
Shame, shame, shame (Masks can break)
or
Shame (Masks can break but you're just a fake)
or
Shame, shame, shame (Masks can break but you're just a fake)
or
Shame (Masks can break)

Sorry, I have a lot of variations of a title. I tend to do that
But seriously, I love your song!

I have another song. I don't know if its very good or not. I just wrote it last night. Very late at around midnight. It's not completely finished but hey - I got a chorus! It's a love song kind of thing. Its about this girl who loves a guy who is broken. You know, something like that. You amazing lyricists can probably figure it out. I have a couple variations for the title:
Hello
or
I can't escape
or
Escape
or
Hello, I can't escape

So if anyone could help me with the title that'd be great. Advice is also greatly accepted.

Intro/Chorus:
Hello, are you there?
I'm breathing thin air
Hello, are you near?
I need you, my dear

Verse:
Running down an empty street
Far from what my eyes can see
But I slip into your lonely web
I feel my breath escaping me
But my heart is singing please
I'm choking on my blood again (or your blood again - I'm not sure)

Chorus:
Hello, are you there?
I'm breathing thin air
I'm writing love all over again
Hello, are you near?
I need you my dear
Can I say I'm not alright?

Bridge: (very slow but very powerful)
I can't escape
Your undying love
When you let it fly
Like a broken dove
No, I can't escape
Your persistent heart
As it lays alone
Shattered in the dark (or As it falls apart - i'm not sure)

Repeat Chorus
Repeat Bridge
Repeat Intro
- END

Haha, yeah - kind of messed up. Help would be greatly appreciated.