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Role Models

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Cigarettes And Suicide
Bleeding on the Floor
Cigarettes And Suicide
Age: 37
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September 15th, 2008 at 08:58pm
This obsession with celebrity and 'I want my fifteen minutes' disgusts me.

I have not seen ONE person ask why the only people we are allowed to think of as 'role models' are celebrities.

My role models are my parents. They've been (mostly) happily married for nearly 25 years, have always set good examples for my brother and I, taught us right from wrong, protected us from the big bad world at its worst, encouraged us to be whoever we wanted to be, and did everything they could to mould us into good, upstanding people.

Why does everybody have to look up to some manufactured dweeb who gets told how to dress, what to say, where to be, and has 'scandals' cooked up by their publicists every time their name drops out of the headlines for ten minutes?
These people aren't real. I don't care how 'positive' or 'negative' they are as role models for young children. They're not who you think they are, they're not something I would want my children looking up to.

What messages do these celebrities send out to the youth of the world?
Some say it's appropriate to go out in public without underwear.
Some say it's okay to sleep around with whomsoever you like.
Some say you're nobody unless you're rich and infamous.
Some try to impart good messages to their fans, but don't back it up with action on their own part.
Some tell their fans to enjoy their work, but not to look to them as role models, because they are simply human beings who make mistakes and don't deserve to be idolised.

I really hate that, in Australia, the media, schools and parents try to push professional athletes onto kids as 'heroes' and role models. Like, some idiot who can swim really fast, or swing a cricket bat, is a 'national hero' and is worthy of being idolised. Same goes for American culture, where someone like Britney Spears, or Miley Cyrus, or the Pussycat Dolls, are revered as role models for our growing youngsters.
What have these people done for our children? What do they teach through their words and actions? How are they shaping our young minds to aspire to be better people?
They're not. They're (and the media's helping them) teaching children that fame and fortune is the only route to happiness, that you can only be a good person if you're chased by paparazzi and made ten million dollars this year. And with some of these celebrities, they're teaching kids that the only way to become rich, infamous and therefore happy, is to expose themselves quite literally. Not in a good way, either, PARIS HILTON I'M LOOKING AT YOU.

I personally want my children to look up to me as a role model. I want them to know the things I have gone through, and how I fought so hard to be the best person I can be. I want them to see that despite the fact that I'm not a millionaire, despite the fact that I can go grocery shopping without having cameras in my face, despite the fact that I'm a nobody, I'm a good, decent, hardworking person who is happy within myself and wants the best for my family.

I know a lot of kids these days come from broken homes and may not idolise their parents they way I think we should, but surely there have been other positive people in your life that you can aspire to be like? My seventh grade teacher, for example, is an amazing lady, a dedicated teacher who really cared so much for her students, and somehow managed to get them interested in learning. That's a great quality to have.
My grandmother, another amazing role model. My friend, who lost her parents and brother in a house fire and can still smile and wants to dedicate her life to helping other people who have lost loved ones.
These are the people we should be emulating.
Mindfuck
Always Born a Crime
Mindfuck
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September 15th, 2008 at 09:13pm
Cigarettes And Suicide:

These are the people we should be emulating.
I find this last line a little off. Because there is no right or wrong answer here. So what if there are some people who look up to Paris Hilton? Or an athlete? There isn't one type of person people should or shouldn't emulate.

I'm not saying you're wrong, but not everyone wants to, or can, look up to people around them. Some people might want to look up to a certain athlete. Maybe they want to become a swimmer or a runner or whatever themselves? For the most part I agree with you, but it doesn't work like that for everyone.
Cigarettes And Suicide
Bleeding on the Floor
Cigarettes And Suicide
Age: 37
Gender: Female
Posts: 1725
September 15th, 2008 at 10:30pm
^ What I'm trying to say, is what does someone like Paris Hilton offer a person who is looking for guidance? She's just some nobody who gets her hair done and goes to nightclubs and screws rock stars. I don't see that there's anything about her that would inspire a person. It was her grandfather or great-grandfather who did all the hard work - if it wasn't for him, nobody would have the slightest clue who she is. What does she actually do that would make a person want to imitate her?

It's fine if you're an aspiring athlete and therefore look up to a famous athlete, but I find in Australian culture it's pushed on us so much it's ridiculous. I have never had aspirations to be an Olympic gold medallist, but throughout my school years, our teachers CONSTANTLY crapped on and on about how great people like Keiran Perkins, Stephanie Rice and Anna Meares are (and I know Anna Meares is amazing, my parents are friends of hers - she's a star in my book because she had a broken neck and still managed to get back on her bike and win a medal. Unlike, say, Jana Rawlinson, who stubbed her freaking toe and cried to the media for weeks about how she couldn't compete and she was devastated. Grow up). I don't give a crap how fast you can swim - what are you teaching me that I'm going to find useful? Yeah, they get up at 3am and train for six hours a day - congratulations. How does that help me to deal with the troubles I'm having in my life?
I get the message about persistence and following your dreams, but sporting 'stars' are just people who managed to be a little more talented than average, who worked hard and are now in the public eye.
Whereas people like my parents, who work harder than others could imagine, aren't considered good role models simply because they're not famous. Yet they do so much for the community and never get any thanks - but they still do it anyway because they like to know they're making a difference in people's lives.

I get what you're saying, but wouldn't it be a better idea to consider somebody who you actually know personally as a role model? Like I said, these celebrities are fake. You don't know the real them. You don't know what they're like without makeup, and a designer dress, and paparazzi in their face. They can say anything they like, for all you know it's an outright lie. I prefer to look up to people who have made a difference in MY life, and aspire to be like those people because I know who they are, how they got to where they are now, and I appreciate the help they've given me.
Like I said, I know a lot of kids these days don't have that kind of support from their parents, or their parents were in some way unfit or abandoned them, so I can understand that not everybody looks up to their parents. But surely they have come across someone, sometime - a friend, a relative, a teacher, a neighbour, whatever, who has helped them or has a lesson that they can learn from.
What about paramedics, firefighters, doctors and nurses, scientists? People who actually save lives, or work hard to help others every day, and do it practically anonymously? They do their jobs for peanuts and don't complain, or chase the spotlight for the achievements.

I just don't see why so many people are aspiring to be like celebrities - what do they have, or what are they teaching, that makes us want to be them so bad? I don't think we idolise people like Paris Hilton because we think she's a nice person and does lots of good things for others - we don't want to be LIKE her, we want to steal her life, and have the car, the clothes, the jewellery, the famous boyfriend, etc. That's not a role model.
Go fuck yourself
Devil's Got Your Number
Go fuck yourself
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September 17th, 2008 at 07:39pm
^I agree with both of you guys. But no one ever said that you can't have a nonfamous role model, I remember when i was like 6 or 7 I watched some show on Disney channel, it was like Storytime with Bell or something and it was an educational show or whatever and once it was talking about role models and the women playing the Disney princess asked all the kids sitting in front of her who their heros were, most of them said like the Spice Girls or Britany Spears (that was back before she was to "out of hand"Wink and it really stuck out to me when one little girl said her daddy. There are people who look up to someone directly effecting their life, but it does seem to be focused on more when a little kid looks up to Miley Cyras or Micheal Pheleps or even Gerard Way, just because they are widely known.

I refuse to condem someones hero, they have their opinions and are allowed to feel how they do. But at what piont does it turn from just an influence, to a role model in some cases obsession? I know plenty of girls who try to be exaclty like Gerard Way, and you know what he is a great person, but how much influence should e be to someone?
sciencefreak897
Banned
sciencefreak897
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September 18th, 2008 at 03:58pm
I have a few role models... This gal Naz who i met online, geez, she's the best! I always look up to her.. She seems so wise and understanding and caring... I even call her my mommy... She's just always there for me when I'm down...

Also, Tom Petty... But he's more of a hero... He's music kind of helped me through a lot of crap.

and also, Gerard Way... Not only has his music helped me through life, but learning about his backround. and how he went through a bunch of the crap I'm going through.... you know.. Like, how he got held down with a gun when he was 15... well, I've had worse... My own DAD held a fucking gun to my head.
Tallulah
Admin
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September 18th, 2008 at 05:09pm
^^This isnt adding to the discussion,
Please read the rules and follow them in future.
Thanks.
Charlie Chaplin
Thinking Happy Thoughts
Charlie Chaplin
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September 20th, 2008 at 01:42am
Everyone is talking about the celebrity idolization like there are 20 year olds and 30 year olds prancing around wanting to be like miley or Britney.
It’s 10 year olds that idolize them, because they’re ‘pretty and cool’, so who wouldn’t want that? The world is much simpler and more forgiving at that age.
The adults that do idolize whorish celebrities or whatever aren’t success stories anyway, so they hardly matter.
I idolize masters of my ideal profession (dr. genecov, look him up), because his intelligence surpasses that of most people in that business, and that impresses and inspires me. I look up to my parents because they’re both very open minded to everything and wont tell me what I can or cant do, there is no ceiling with them. I idolize my calculus professor because he’s a genius. Heroes and idols are, to me, someone I aspire to be like, NOT look like. The intelligence, drive and open-mindedness of these people are what I strive to replicate.
You shouldn’t be a carbon copy of whomever you admire.
IceHog69
Bulletproof Heart
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September 20th, 2008 at 10:33am
Cigarettes And Suicide:
I have not seen ONE person ask why the only people we are allowed to think of as 'role models' are celebrities.

I didn't ask simply because I accepted that a lot of people's role models are not celebrities. mine was my mom for a very long time, because she cared about me and my brother more than anything in the world, and she wanted to do a degree, so she took and ou course, and worked at the same time. Only now, she lost that stauts. She would leave my and Nat to go to his dad's on our own because she was with her boyfriend. She woul;d leave us waiting at the bus stop for two hours+ because she 'forgot about the time'. She would not turn up for parents evening. So she lost that role model status, and I found someone else.

Lots of people have role models that are family, or friends. It is usually the celebrity role models that are the most discussion provoking, because people know what they are talking about, I mean, it's hard to discuss whether her mom is a good role model if you don't know anything about them.
Cigarettes And Suicide:
^
What about paramedics, firefighters, doctors and nurses, scientists? People who actually save lives, or work hard to help others every day, and do it practically anonymously? They do their jobs for peanuts and don't complain, or chase the spotlight for the achievements.

I also look up to fire fighters, because they put their lives in danger, but they aren't role models. They are more heroes. I'm not sure if there is a differnece, but there is to me. A role model to me is someone that you look up to, and want to be like, whereas a hero is someone who you admire. Someone you think is amazing, but you couldn't be like. I know you can be a firefighter, or a cop, or a paramedic, but you can't have evey single one as a role model. In order for someone to be a role model, they have to be a someone, rather than another face. You know? It didn't really come across right I don't think, but it's the best I can do. I hope you understand what I'm trying to say.
Cigarettes And Suicide
Bleeding on the Floor
Cigarettes And Suicide
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September 20th, 2008 at 09:05pm
^ No, I definitely do get what you're trying to say. Made perfect sense to me lol Very Happy
But I guess I just find today's celebrities are, to me anyway, more anti-role models... like, 'What not to do/wear/say/behave etc 101' kind of stuff.
If I was going to look up to a celebrity, it would have to be someone who I actually admire, rather than just some manufactured bimbo who got famous for having a sex tape and has admitted to taking drugs. Maybe someone like Gerard Way, who has dragged himself up from being nobody, to being a successful musician who loves his work, and has not had a hand up on the way. He struggled with and beat a drug addiction, he put in more hours than I can possibly imagine in order to get where he is today, and yeah, he had his band and family's support on the journey, but who doesn't have somebody to be there for them?

I guess what I'm trying to say is, what has Miley Cyrus done for anybody? What do the Pussycat Dolls teach little girls who are already thinking way too much about body image, their sexuality and things I feel should be left for older teenagers? I just don't know why somebody would idolise a person like Paris Hilton or Britney Spears, because they don't actually do anything except wear nice clothes, drive nice cars, and own far too many teacup chihuahuas.
John St. John
Shotgun Sinner
John St. John
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September 21st, 2008 at 07:06am
Cigarettes And Suicide:


I guess what I'm trying to say is, what has Miley Cyrus done for anybody?



Just because Gerard way beat drugs doesn't make him a role model, and i don't care if this sounds harsh but no-one made him take drugs anyway.

Maybe Miley Cyrus should be a role model because shes never resorted to drugs? or maybe people would feel better about her if she did and then checked herself into rehab like alot of celebrities these days.

I just hate when people are praised and idolized for doing something like beating drugs, and people who have led a clean life are forgotten and discounted.

And how do you know Miley Cyrus hasn't put in all the hours? She has a successful acting and music career and is obviously doing well.
Mindfuck
Always Born a Crime
Mindfuck
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September 21st, 2008 at 07:25am
One also has to remember that Gerard Way is a 31 year old, and Miley Cyrus is a 15 year old. Gerard Way has seemingly achieved much more than Miley, at least in terms of career and influencing people, and what they do for a living in terms of music and artistic endeavors are aimed at different age groups anyway. So I don't see how someone can compare them in a role model sense because of that.

On paper, yeah, It's easy to look at Gerard and go: "Wow, he's such a good role model because he's done this, this and this. Miley, what has she done? NOTHING!"
You have to look at their ages and their career. Miley can be a role model for people, just like Gerard can. Like To Zanarkand mentioned, yeah she hasn't beaten drug addiction - but why is that looked down upon? So she hasn't beaten drugs and "dragged herself up from being a nobody"? She's 15, and a Disney star. Why is that so wrong?

Sorry if I sound like I'm repeating what To Zanarkand said above me, but when I read their post I couldn't help but agree.
Go fuck yourself
Devil's Got Your Number
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September 21st, 2008 at 04:26pm
To Zanarkand:

Just because Gerard Way beat drugs doesn't make him a role model, and i don't care if this sounds harsh but no-one made him take drugs anyway.

Maybe Miley Cyrus should be a role model because shes never resorted to drugs? or maybe people would feel better about her if she did and then checked herself into rehab like alot of celebrities these days.

I just hate when people are praised and idolized for doing something like beating drugs, and people who have led a clean life are forgotten and discounted.

And how do you know Miley Cyrus hasn't put in all the hours? She has a successful acting and music career and is obviously doing well.

Your right, no one ever forced Gerard to take drugs. He still did though. But what makes him a hero isn't that he did do drugs then decided that if he cut his drug use alittle bit people would coo over him and give him all this attention and so forth. No, he started taking drugs probably due to the fact that he suffered from depression and he wanted an escape, and I can relate, I suffer from manic depression, I got into alot of drugs and did alot of shit just for a cheap escape for awhile. Then he did something that for every person on drugs his one of the biggest struggles that they ever have to do, he gave it up. And if you aren't hooked to drugs, you don't know just how hard that really is. Not only did he just give them up alittle bit, he went cold turkey and now looking up to him, if he can do it, I can do it. Due to that simple fact I got clean and I have stayed clean for about 5 months now, and I did suffer through some withdrawls.

But who said Miley Cyras isn't doing drugs? I mean with most teen actresses when they first resort to drugs, its not thrusted out there and till something happens. For all we know she is.

And you know what, being a recovering "druggie" or whatever you want to call it, I admire people who don't do drugs. So I don't know where this idea that if someone is clean then no one respects them or whatever, I admire my friends who are striaght edge or just simply choose not to do any substances, but I don't like sit there and go on praising them for hours on end. And alot of drug addicts don't really get that much attention.
Katie Kill!
Killjoy
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September 21st, 2008 at 06:29pm
Although I admire people that are in bands such as Green Day and MCR because of how they've changed my life. They are not my role models.
My Dad and my best friend Sophie, They're my role models.
To me those to are the most amazing people on the planet and I love them to absolute death. They are always there for people, never afraid to speak their mind, extreamly loyal, caring and they always make me see things in a different and slightly more positive way, I owe alot to these two.
samantha connolly
In The Murder Scene
samantha connolly
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September 21st, 2008 at 10:44pm
HEY GUYS.
this isn't a thread about who your role model is.
this is a thread for discussing what makes a role model and who is one.
if you'd like to discuss your role model, we have a thread in the Chamber.
please STOP posting off-topic posts. thank you!
Cigarettes And Suicide
Bleeding on the Floor
Cigarettes And Suicide
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September 22nd, 2008 at 08:33am
I get it.
I'm lame for not considering vapid morons as role models.

Seriously though, I get your points. I obviously also admire people who have never done drugs, as well as those who have beat addictions... But I still just cannot understand why a little kid would look up to a celebrity when they have perfectly good role models IRL. People who know their name, who have impacted on their lives in some way.
Charlie Chaplin
Thinking Happy Thoughts
Charlie Chaplin
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September 23rd, 2008 at 08:25pm
It's because when you're that age, you don't have that capability of thinking "wow, Miley Cyrus is a skank and really shouldn't be looked at in admiration/idolization, despite being a popstar and having lots of friends (again, from a kid's perspective) and being pretty!"

No, they just see that she sings on stage and everyone (everyone as in kids, still at that mindset) loves her and wants hang out with her, so why wouldn't they look up to that?

Kids aren't at that place mentally where they're thinking progressively, making educated decisions about miniscule things such as who they should LITERALLY grow up to be like. It's all rainbows and unicorns for these kids that get to watch Disney Channel.

Of course, there are kids who don't have that luxury, so they fall under different categories, because they're forced to grow up much faster.

Anyway.
blow
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blow
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September 23rd, 2008 at 10:08pm
Charlie Chaplin:
wow, Miley Cyrus is a skank and really shouldn't be looked at in admiration/idolization

How the hell is she a skank? She's a fifteen year old girl, she's made some mistakes, but that doesn't make her a skank. I know kids who have met her and they all say that she is kind and caring towards her fans. She's not a bad person.

Quote
Of course, there are kids who don't have that luxury, so they fall under different categories, because they're forced to grow up much faster.

So if you don't have the Disney Channel, you're 'forced' to grow up? I don't see how watching the Disney Channel makes your childhood last longer or anything like that.
Cigarettes And Suicide
Bleeding on the Floor
Cigarettes And Suicide
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Posts: 1725
September 24th, 2008 at 04:39am
Charlie Chaplin:
Kids aren't at that place mentally where they're thinking progressively, making educated decisions about miniscule things such as who they should LITERALLY grow up to be like. It's all rainbows and unicorns for these kids that get to watch Disney Channel.

Maybe I was just a really weird kid then, because I can't remember admiring celebrities in a way that meant I wanted to emulate them. Sure, I had the biggest crush on MacGuyver known to man (like, Patty and Selma ain't got nothin' on me), and I used to run around my backyard, climb trees and pretend I was Indiana Jones, but I was never like, 'Oh wow, when I grow up I want to be just like ...'
Even as a little kid, I always looked to my parents and certain teachers at school, as an example of how to live my life.
Obviously I get that some kids are from broken homes, or don't have suitable parents that would lead to them being role models, and in those situations I guess I can understand. But I honestly think that the kids who don't have loving, caring and responsible parents that can be looked up to are few and far between. I only knew of a couple of kids who didn't have 'good' parents. Everybody else I knew had great mums and dads who were excellent role models... but despite the fact that so many kids have great parents, they still choose to ignore them as being good examples, because they're not rich, famous or have their own TV shows.

I get what you're saying about being at that age, but not many of my friends or I wanted to be famous and rich as kids. We just wanted to be good people, raise cute kids, and get our drivers' licences.
Mindfuck
Always Born a Crime
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September 24th, 2008 at 09:21am
Cigarettes And Suicide:
Maybe I was just a really weird kid then, because I can't remember admiring celebrities in a way that meant I wanted to emulate them. Sure, I had the biggest crush on MacGuyver known to man (like, Patty and Selma ain't got nothin' on me), and I used to run around my backyard, climb trees and pretend I was Indiana Jones, but I was never like, 'Oh wow, when I grow up I want to be just like ...'
Even as a little kid, I always looked to my parents and certain teachers at school, as an example of how to live my life.
Obviously I get that some kids are from broken homes, or don't have suitable parents that would lead to them being role models, and in those situations I guess I can understand. But I honestly think that the kids who don't have loving, caring and responsible parents that can be looked up to are few and far between. I only knew of a couple of kids who didn't have 'good' parents. Everybody else I knew had great mums and dads who were excellent role models... but despite the fact that so many kids have great parents, they still choose to ignore them as being good examples, because they're not rich, famous or have their own TV shows.

I get what you're saying about being at that age, but not many of my friends or I wanted to be famous and rich as kids. We just wanted to be good people, raise cute kids, and get our drivers' licences.
Looking up to, or admiring (or whatever you want to call it), pop stars and celebrities is just one of those things most people do when they're younger, though Shifty2
And even though I know you didn't do that yourself (because you've stated it a few times), a lot of kids do that and I think it's quite normal, to be honest. I mean, what adult (or older teenager) can say that the celebrity or pop star they admired when they were 9 or 10 is the same person they mostly admire and look up to today? Seeing pop stars and pop icons as role models when you're younger are usually just phases that come to pass, and I don't think that is necessarily restricted to underprivileged kids, or kids who grew up in homes where they're parents weren't good role models.

To illustrate my point:
when I was 8 and 9 I saw the Spice Girls as my role models. I wanted to be just like Baby Spice, and I know (looking back now) she wouldn't have been the best of role models because she dressed and looked like a Barbie doll, and in a way she oozed sex appeal and sexuality (but I didn't understand most of that at that age). I grew up in a home where both my parents were married (and still are), and I was never abused or neglected. I grew up in a home where I had fantastic parents. But yet I didn't really see my parents as my role models because they didn't appeal to me at the time. I didn't understand all of the great things they did for me, and indeed the wonderful things they gave me and my siblings because I was 8, and my world was very self centered.
But that is how children are - they are fickle and they don't see things in rational ways.

Do I look up to Baby Spice now? Of course not. I'm 19 years old and my views of the world have changed. I passed that phase long ago.

I guess the point I'm trying to make (in a long winded way) is that a lot of the pop stars and Disney actors etc. that children may look up to are usually just phases and they grow out of them. They don't place people like Miley Cyrus above their parents forever - eventually that 11 year old girl who sees Miley as her role model will probably move on after a few years. We all go through silly pop star phases. Or at least most of the people I grew up with did.

And personally, I don't see why that's such a bad thing. I seemed to have reached adulthood quite finely, despite the fact that I didn't see my parents as role models when I was younger.
Cigarettes And Suicide
Bleeding on the Floor
Cigarettes And Suicide
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September 24th, 2008 at 08:15pm
^ Don't worry, I totally get what you're saying. Maybe I was just a really weird kid lol. I admired certain celebrities, obviously, but I didn't want to dress like them, style my hair like them, have their lives and all the rest of what comes with most of this celebrity obsession these days. Maybe it's because celebrities back then weren't such tabloid fodder - they made a movie, you watched it, you liked it, you might read occasionally in New Idea that they'd got married or won an award. These days, however, the saturation of tabloid culture in our society is ridiculous.

I also get what you're saying about kids from good families, but obviously a few people in this thread have disputed my reasons for looking up to people you know in real life, by saying 'What if your parents are unfit to be role models?' which is fair enough. But as I said, those kids are thankfully few and far between, and yet the vast majority of kids want to emulate celebrities.

I'm not sure what my point is...
I was an oddball of a kid, and I'm an oddball of an adult.
Very Happy I've never done what everyone else was doing, I suppose.