laser surgery and bowl full of sugar- guran's poetry.
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guran! Shotgun Sinner ![]() Age: 31 Gender: Female Posts: 9179 | i lack originality to make a good entrance like many of the poets on here do. so just. xD enjoy what i got and. comment if you want. (: i'm sort of rusty to begin with. eh. --- cappuccino sunset the bitter feeling of lust and regret caressed his pale, porcelain skin and he tried to grab the sand as it fell out of place and into a gap- penetrating everything in its way contradicting everything he ever knew but those darkly dancing figures- moving as if they were on fire, never asked for his name, or his soul they just wanted to show him what it felt like to be trapped in a moment in time like a smile capture in a photograph those darkly dancing figures who never asked his name never asked him for anything and yet blindly he followed them with ease letting hours slip away without notice but he was too off balance to notice it felt like the moment was never going to end but like dragon flies on autumn days time had escaped his hand too quickly without so much as a moment passing and it was finally time for one of those mediocre cappuccino sunset. |
goodbye blue sky Always Born a Crime ![]() Age: 29 Gender: Female Posts: 6461 | Haha, your name sounds quite familiar to me, but anyway. "Cappuccino Sunset", such a good title! "but like dragon flies on autumn days time had escaped his hand too quickly without so much as a moment passing and it was finally time " There were many favorite parts, but this was maybe the best =) Good work, waiting for your new poems =) |
guran! Shotgun Sinner ![]() Age: 31 Gender: Female Posts: 9179 | thank you, and. xD well. you used to comment my poems quite a bit. and you got me to listen to chopin. !<3 --- sing-along-songs half beaten words flow on the sidewalk leading the way to a more timid place the idea of magic withers with the leaves as everybody fly away for more vibrant colors not being prepared for a view of lower contrast the shadows sailed away with the pirate ship made of epic poems and haiku's in bold manners but storms of sonnets met them with rage how could they have forgotten about the rhythmic way of the poem? and on the bay of the rugged mainland lay abandoned words of ballads and free verse poetry trying to forget how they betrayed the others and when the waves crashed in their words were washed away like seashells- their imagery breaking under the pressure and finally sleeping with the fishes. |
Annika. Motor Baby ![]() Age: 33 Gender: Female Posts: 930 | Cappuccino Sunset, what a lovely title. (: Seriously, where do you get these ideas from ? It's so original, but you are original. <3 never asked for his name, or his soul they just wanted to show him what it felt like to be trapped in a moment in time like a smile capture in a photograph it's so deep, and the beauty of the image that you paint is out of this galaxy. I always love reading your work. <3 I'll comment on the other one later. |
guran! Shotgun Sinner ![]() Age: 31 Gender: Female Posts: 9179 | thaaank you annika. <3 i really love getting comments. ^-^ ----------------------------- city lights and broken voids a bloodcurdling feeling runs down her spine as she watches the city lights pass her by shining brightly; blinding her from second chances trying to prevent the inevitable course of actions- and reactions the archetypal looks being exchanged by lovers expressing the once non-existent feeling of loneliness with her smile repressed and her fists telling all she was ready for the expected and expecting the unreliably unexpected all the pictures in her mind appear vaguely familiar and withering away the bloodcurdling feeling jumps off her spine as the city lights caress her porcelain cheeks when she lays down to fall asleep- for the very first time. |
kings of leon. Always Born a Crime ![]() Age: 32 Gender: Female Posts: 6213 | I love your imagery in this, and the scene's you set up, it reminded me of a painting by Edward Hopper called Nighthawks tbh. As always I love the thoughts behind what you wrote but I think these lines: she was ready for the expected and expecting the unreliably unexpected Broke the flow a little, I had to re-read them a couple of times to get it clear in my head which sort of, took me away from the picture's you were creating so perfectly. But really, I havn't read your work in a while, but everytime I come back to it you seem to have got better and better, and I remember the first couple of times I read your poetry, and you've just become so much more sophisticated in word choice and everything, brilliant : ) |
Annika. Motor Baby ![]() Age: 33 Gender: Female Posts: 930 | City Lights and Broken Voids was reading fine literature. You got so many details that create an atmosphere, and they paint a vividly picture. And like Jessie said you're just getting better and better. (: |
guran! Shotgun Sinner ![]() Age: 31 Gender: Female Posts: 9179 | here's on i wrote in class. i don't like it all that much myself but, c/c? ----- color catcher colors burnt on the window sill peeling off slowly, like a child unable to let go- of memories of long lost happy days and greener grass the colors exist only to make metaphors like colorful photographs fading away into sepia tone becoming more distant and classy with the passing decade "mourn for me," beautiful shades of blue cry, painting the floor with a bright, vivid tone of neverending grey they can feel the photographer approaching slowly getting ready to capture the moment in time when the blue shades toned grey turn into a more loved and adored hue flash! and the moment has been captured, lost like bad dreams caught in a dream catcher the colors fade away, like bad dreams but the memories always exist expressing what could've been. |
guran! Shotgun Sinner ![]() Age: 31 Gender: Female Posts: 9179 | i don't like the title all too much but anyways. c/c? ------------ the past, the present- all black and white too many words, too few colors their idea of word association was broken and falling apart like a grandfather clock ticking but missing its tock blue and yellow make the color envy like misery and decades make honesty her fingers unwind the clock trying to regain the years lost locked inside a space of broken times she only got back two years, five hours and twenty seven-minutes ago and she was back to where she started out; tea time and his warm sunny smile and a large vocabulary in style without colors everything is falling apart and his sunny smile turning black and white and his large vocabulary taught her a lesson blue and red don't make green and the years pass by much quicker the second time around |
kings of leon. Always Born a Crime ![]() Age: 32 Gender: Female Posts: 6213 | Colour Catcher mesmerized me a little bit tbh. The vivid descriptions really caught my imagination but I think The past the present - all black and white really stood out. their idea of word association was broken and falling apart I loved your wording there. the tone of it makes me want to believe anything you tell me. And I love you use of colour in this one too. Oh and this line and a large vocabulary in style For some reason caught my imagination. I loved the imagery mixed with these bold statements. As you've probably guessed, I still love to read your work <3 |
Exposure. Thinking Happy Thoughts ![]() Age: - Gender: Female Posts: 450 | This is just wonderful (i wish i could figure out how to change the txt so i look like everyone else...) |
guran! Shotgun Sinner ![]() Age: 31 Gender: Female Posts: 9179 | thank you for the comments. (: i really appriecate it. |
Annika. Motor Baby ![]() Age: 33 Gender: Female Posts: 930 | So I haven't read anything from you in a while, but I can tell you that you are truly growing as a poet. (: blue and red don't make green I really loved that line, because I've always heard that the color of jealousy is toxic green, but I don't know if you referring to that. But all in all, I really liked the title and the imagery was perfect. |
guran! Shotgun Sinner ![]() Age: 31 Gender: Female Posts: 9179 | sunburn in the evening the empty sound of forever echoed through his mind not considering how he felt about those distant memories a whole two hours since the sun had showed him faith by bringing him up in the wake of the evening trying to get him to follow her tracks leading to something far more serious than a series of unforgettable memories in blend with anxiety he spent his nights in that old house counting the stars and measuring their lengths and every moment spent there, counting, was a moment without the thought of what he would become and remembering who he was, and who he had been— who he never would be entangled in a sweet and acid like game he fell to his knees, his eyes stained with regret his shirt with the guilt of his actions; in a moment he realized who he was becoming and forgot who he was he forgot to follow the sun in the heat of his psychological battle between himself and the moon ----------------------------- good morning, lost direction Good morning lost direction, what are you looking for today, in this baby blue weather? are you looking for someone you lost or did you just want some time off? you play the blues like you were two shades darker than this awe-inspiring weather playing the wind chimes like you know better than that underrated, narcissistic wind. your steps become heavier yet you go nowhere because there's nowhere to go when the direction is lost. irony, is that your middle name? you seem to drip with ill-fated luck and life is too sadistic to be speaking in a vaguely familiar form of sarcasm there's nothing wrong with your way of life, not in the sense of black and white at least. funny, is no one looking for you? your parents must be sick with worry sleeping on the cold tiled bathroom floor their eyes bloodshot from pain their hands worn out from holding back the feeling of looking without direction. sadistic that's the only word which describes how you yell out for a piece or clue how you asked for a way to go but I'm sorry, poor little lost direction for I'm also lost, searching for a trail once lost and we are but comrades in our simplicity in searching we do not look in space, nor time we only stand still in this undecided moment, stuck in time and thus, lost direction, we part. I bid you farewell and good luck I hope you find home, as I will do myself. Good morning, lost direction what will you look for tomorrow? _________________ haven't posted in here since October... what a shame. |
kings of leon. Always Born a Crime ![]() Age: 32 Gender: Female Posts: 6213 | you play the blues like you were two shades darker. One of the best lines I've read in months. I just loved that line. It's simple but beautiful. And that last poem moved me quite alot, I've been attempting [and failing] to say just exactly what you said. Now I feel I really don't have to. Its is definately a shame you havn't posted in so long. It's a shame this board has lost the buzz and enthusiasm it used to have, but that last poem just reminded me so much of why I always come back here to check out everyones stuff. It was brilliant, imo : ) |
guran! Shotgun Sinner ![]() Age: 31 Gender: Female Posts: 9179 | I realize that I haven't post in forever. But I suddenly got the urge to come visit. ![]() Also, if any of my friends from the poetry board see this, I miss you guys! ![]() ----------------------- oh sweet sugar the complex situation of failing yourself and failing others calls for a toast because at the bottom of the bottle is perpetual courage which only lasts for one evening but oh! what courage it brings liberating them so they can soar and their love life evolve as if God was only a lie but often after the courage has been inhaled and words have been had one might find oneself in agony and pain of their actions the following morning. ---------- Perpetuity’s End And I will embrace every word That we failed to remember In the midst of our memories Buried in the white sand Not far from the church I will express every thought That I wouldn’t share with you On our worn-out search for perpetuity Because we found it all too soon And allowed it to end Ironically However, these shades of green Refuse to let me go A promise of return isn’t enough for them And they’re not prepared to wait Forever Even if I embrace every word Forgotten Even if I expressed every though I didn’t share I’d still be left with just A lingering touch and aching muscles ------------------ I hope you enjoy. |
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