A Demolition Lover's Poetry
Author | Message |
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DemolitionLover363 Killjoy Age: 30 Gender: Female Posts: 33 | I am not a child. I do not get scared By the boogieman under the bed. I am not a child. I don’t jump When I hear a thunderstorm outside. I am not a child. I don’t run to Daddy In the hope he’ll keep me safe. I am not a child. But I am a human. I do get scared At the thought of losing someone I love. I am a human. I do cry When my heart gets broken again. I am a human. I don’t like To spend all night on my own in the dark. I am a human. Am I not a person? With my own rights And my own responsibilities? Am I not a person? With the will To fight for what I believe in? Am I not a person? Who can be scared Without having to always be brave? Am I not a person? I am not a child. But it doesn’t mean I am invincible or never weakened. I am a human. I have the choice To be rational or irrational when alarmed. And I am a person. I have dreams But also nightmares in my sleep. I am not a child. |
DemolitionLover363 Killjoy Age: 30 Gender: Female Posts: 33 | Silence The shadows dancing on the ceiling Match the shadows taking over your face I turn away from your bedside Just another unsolvable case The doctor knocks on the door I know it’s time for me to leave Your eyes show me nothing at all I know it’s time for me to grieve For I’ve realised now that you’re gone You went silent a long time ago I hate to see you locked up like this As the darkness of your mind overflows I don’t know if you see as I’m going I’m not sure if you did you would care You don’t even know who I am anymore Your eyes show only an empty stare I have all the confirmation I needed Your spirit is already long dead So will your body be soon enough As the nurse lays you down on the bed And I’ve realised now that you’re gone You went silent a long time ago I hate to see you locked up like this As the darkness of your mind overflows I never really knew you very well But now it seems oh so wrong That the man once again sat across from me Doesn’t know I am writing this song You look blankly past my tired self Is it really that interesting, the wall? I search desperately through my memory And try oh so hard to recall A time when you might have been okay Normal, or even just more alive Where is your strength, your hope, your willpower? Your motivation just to survive? But I’ve realised now that you’re gone I should’ve seen it a long time ago I really can’t see you locked up like this And watch the darkness in your mind overflow. |
DemolitionLover363 Killjoy Age: 30 Gender: Female Posts: 33 | Alone I’m lying here With tears in my eyes But that’s no surprise It’s not like it’s the first time I was in love From the very first day In the craziest way There’s no more for me to say It’s much too easy For me to fall in so deep Give my heart for you to keep And say your name in my sleep Then to feel this way How could I be so wrong? When I thought I was strong Now I don’t wanna carry on Alone Now it’s just me With no-one to hold Left outside in the cold With no place to call my own You stole my heart Like so many times before I can’t take it anymore My heart agrees with me, I’m sure And it’s much too easy For me to fall in so deep Give my heart for you to keep And say your name in my sleep Then to feel this way Oh how could I be so wrong? When I thought I was strong Now I don’t wanna carry on Alone And now my heart will mend itself Like it’s always had to do And it’s all because of you And it’s all because of you It’s much too easy For me to fall in so deep Give my heart for you to keep And say your name in my sleep Then to feel this way How could I be so wrong? When I thought I was strong Now I don’t wanna carry on It’s much too easy For me to fall in so deep Give my heart for you to keep And say your name in my sleep Then to feel this way How could I be so wrong? When I thought I was strong Now I don’t wanna carry on Alone... |
DemolitionLover363 Killjoy Age: 30 Gender: Female Posts: 33 | UNTITLED HOW DO YOU THINK I SHOULD FEEL? DO YOU WANT ME TO CARRY ON? WHEN THE PAIN INSIDE IS SO REAL DO YOU THINK I CAN BE STRONG? YOU STOLE MY HEART AND MY SOUL AND YOU TOOK ALL THERE WAS TO TAKE AND SET ME UP FOR MY DOWNFALL IT WAS MY MISTAKE TO MAKE HOW DID I CARE FOR YOU? TRUST YOU ENOUGH TO SAY THE THINGS I KEPT SO SECRET PAST THAT WAS LOCKED AWAY HOW COULD I BELIEVE YOU? YOU’RE SOMEONE I NEVER KNEW MY HOPES WERE BLINDING ME AND TO THINK THAT I LOVED YOU I KNOW YOUR DECISION WAS RIGHT I KNOW IT WAS TIME TO MOVE ON BUT NOW I FACE SO MANY NIGHTS OF LAYING HERE ON MY OWN AND I’M DROWNING ONE MORE TIME IN ALL OF THE BLOOD AND THE TEARS YOU MADE SURE I STAYED UNDER AND MADE ME RELIVE MY FEARS HOW DID I CARE FOR YOU? TRUST YOU ENOUGH TO SAY THE THINGS I KEPT SO SECRET PAST THAT WAS LOCKED AWAY HOW COULD I BELIEVE YOU? YOU’RE SOMEONE I NEVER KNEW MY HOPES WERE BLINDING ME AND TO THINK THAT I LOVED YOU SO WALK AWAY FROM MY SADNESS AND LEAVE AS I CRY IN SORROW WE LIVE IN THIS WORLD OF MADNESS FOR ME THERE IS NO TOMORROW. NB - I wrote this out in Microsoft Word first and I was feeling really upset at the time. I wrote it all in capitals and it would take a while to re-write it. I hope nobody minds my capital letters!! xx |
DemolitionLover363 Killjoy Age: 30 Gender: Female Posts: 33 | Me I'm just me It's something you could never be I'm random and I'm strange But it's a fact you'll never change I'm just me I try so hard to make you see That I want to be myself And I don't need anybody's help I'm just me And I hope you will agree That I'm fine the way I am And if you don't WHO GIVES A DAMN? |
DemolitionLover363 Killjoy Age: 30 Gender: Female Posts: 33 | Living With My 14-Year-Old Self One day at a time I count down The years I live with myself Past caring What others think of me But always knowing That no-one's perfect Especially not me One minute at a time I count away The time it takes me to see That I'm not What I think I am That's something different To how others see me One friend at a time I count up All the people I have hurt To help myself But then I think It doesn't hurt to want Something for myself One problem at a time I count alone The things I have to deal with And realise That life isn't so bad It's not always good But It's always worth living. |
Your Ghost. Thinking Happy Thoughts Age: 28 Gender: Female Posts: 440 | Your poems are really goodd!! Moreee!! lolz XD |
DemolitionLover363 Killjoy Age: 30 Gender: Female Posts: 33 | thank you!! i will post more soon xx brit |
DemolitionLover363 Killjoy Age: 30 Gender: Female Posts: 33 | I’ll Be Falling Solo From Now On In a classroom full of people, She sits alone. Lost in her own thoughts, The others tease her, Make fun. She doesn’t even notice. In her head, she is happy. In her head, she is loved. But nothing, Not even the sweet, sweet dreams, Can erase the nightmare she will face When she returns home. She is imagining herself, Somewhere far away from where she is. She imagines all the way home from school. But when she walks in, the dream is shattered. Like being woken from a deep sleep, She is brought back to the real world. Not gently woken though. The slap to the face is not gentle. She drops her bag on the floor, As she listens to her mum shout abuse at her. She knows it is all true. “You dirty, filthy little whore.” Yes Mum, I know. “You’ll never be anything.” Yes Mum. “You’re just a no-good little slut.” I know, Mum, I know. She walks up the stairs to her room. She turns on the computer, And starts to write an email to a pen pal. Her mother comes up the stairs after her. “Don’t walk away from me, you dirty cow.” I’m sorry Mum. I didn’t mean it. I’ll never do it again. “You dare be cheeky to me?” No Mum. “You ungrateful little sod.” I’m really sorry, Mum. Her mum walks up behind her. Before the hit, before her head hits the floor, She can smell the alcohol on her mum’s breath. Her mother looks down at her. “Get up, you dirty slag.” Okay Mum, I’m getting up. “For all I’ve done for you...” Slap. “Look what you went and made me do.” I’m sorry for making you hit me, Mum. I really am. “You can’t go to school tomorrow, that’ll bruise.” Okay Mum, I’ll stay home again. She really wants to go to school. At least there, she doesn’t get hit. Well, not too much. At least at school, she has something to do. Something to take her mind off The throbbing pain in her ear. A pain she got from one too many knocks on the head, From falling down the stairs. My, she was so clumsy. She stays in her bedroom today, though. She sits, and she dreams. She tries hard to think of any times When it wasn’t like this. She gives up. Those times were obviously long ago, Before she could remember them. So she dreams. But then Mum returns from the shop. Oh dear. I have to do something before she comes up. I know. The only people who noticed she was gone, Were the bullies. They didn’t have anyone to pick on. |
DemolitionLover363 Killjoy Age: 30 Gender: Female Posts: 33 | This was one of my poetry challenge entries City Lights The south wind blows A cold chill down my back Caught in the throws Of a blinding attack The birds are all calling They've come all this way To hills rolling, planes sprawling But I long for the day I will live life downtown See the people and the lights I will walk all around And take in the sights But I know I must wait My day hasn't come yet I will not chase my fate But I really can't forget That I had a dream once Of living the dream I have to keep working And then I'll be free. |
DemolitionLover363 Killjoy Age: 30 Gender: Female Posts: 33 | Scarred You cut me deep Like barbed wire in a razor wound. Sure I wouldn’t surface again You hid me like a dark secret. I disappeared I drowned in the tears And the darkness suffocated me. The blood you drew Was the essence of my soul. My spirit withered Shrank and died away Leaving just the emptiness. When I ran out of sorrow I turned instead to anger. Then from anger To pure desperation. And from that helplessness To nothing. I am nothing. I am but a silhouette of myself Drawn against a white curtain. I am an outline Scribbled in the frenzy of a dream Onto paper. I am a ghost. The shadow you see Against the wall by the dim light Of a single lamp. I am only gone. |
DemolitionLover363 Killjoy Age: 30 Gender: Female Posts: 33 | Searching Hollow shells And empty shadows. Secret hells And public gallows. Waging war And fighting for rights. Dark back-alleys And bright streetlights. Endless nights And retreating days. A fork in the road We go separate ways. Wanting more But still needing less. Taking stock Of an organised mess. Losing hope And being put on a shelf. But always wondering Will I find myself? |
DemolitionLover363 Killjoy Age: 30 Gender: Female Posts: 33 | Feigned Naivety It’s these extenuating circumstances We find ourselves drowned in That really takes the cake this time Come on Tell me you won’t be starting a fight tonight I need to hear it from your lips The red lips that tell the white lies I fall for it every time And it means nothing to you Or the world you fool so easily With a flash of the smile and batted lashes Oh, you’re so innocent And it makes me feel sick To watch you watching me like I’m the one They all pay attention to Cry for me now And I’ll die for you forever But tell me the story of last night’s party At the rich divorcee’s house Did you tell him what you are? Or did you keep him in suspense As you took off your dress I’m only wondering And I’m curious as to how much wool You’ve gotta be hiding To make everyone think you’re the angel Well you can have back my piece ‘Cause it’s not over my eyes anymore No, you’re not fooling me anymore. |
DemolitionLover363 Killjoy Age: 30 Gender: Female Posts: 33 | Signature Bordered with gold frills Covering hard redwood. The notice board sits low So pupils of small stature Can read the information. Get involved! Be part of something! The orange paper screams at me. I sign my name. Bright white paper Boasts bold black writing. The official next to me Promises this will keep The man away from me. He won’t come near me For fear of facing the courts. He hands me a pen. I sign my name. I, of sound mind But not of sound body, Hereby declare to leave All my worldly possessions To my daughter, her child too. Some to my best friend Who has been there for me, And seen me through to find peace. I sign my name. |
DemolitionLover363 Killjoy Age: 30 Gender: Female Posts: 33 | Angel Of Anger Rage And a red mist to match. Spittle flies from his mouth. As he screams She cowers in the corner Too scared to do the same. Fear Of times worse than this. She says a silent prayer. As he screams She cowers in the corner Too weak to do the same. Surprise You would never believe. His perfect features distort. As he screams She cowers in the corner Too tired to do the same. Need She looks at his face now. Realises she can’t see. As he screams She cowers in the corner Too shocked to do the same. Hope His beautiful self packs. And now he lets her alone. As he leaves She huddles in the corner Too heartbroken to call his name. |
DemolitionLover363 Killjoy Age: 30 Gender: Female Posts: 33 | Crash Around Me What if the sky were to fall down? Would you know your own happiness? Would you know, even What happiness is? What if the sea were to swallow us? Would you know that you were loved? Would you care, even To know who by? What if What if... What if the world were to end right now? Would you be ready to say a final goodbye? Would you know, even What that word means? If it were all to crash around me now If it were all to finish right here I’d rather live til my time runs out And not know my death was near. |
DemolitionLover363 Killjoy Age: 30 Gender: Female Posts: 33 | Crawling Down on my knees, I’m crawling. Striving for attention, Anybody to say, “Yes, I’m listening.” Starved of an ear to hear me, And a shoulder to cry on. I can’t leave. He told me I can’t leave. I can only imagine the price. So I stay in the house. The only time I’m allowed out, Is to fetch shopping so I can cook. Wouldn’t want anyone to notice, To see the bruises that fight for space On my face, arms and neck. At first, he would leave them only In places where no-one could see them. But now it doesn’t matter to him. He knows that even if someone were to suspect, I would not tell the truth. He turned me into everything I never aspired to be. A liar, a recluse, scared to dream. I can never imagine what life would be without him. I don’t know how to. It’s like I’ve never known anything else. |
Pansy Wayero Jazz Hands Age: 33 Gender: Female Posts: 372 | WOW these poems are great! i realy like untold fears and me, very genius peices of work. well done. *clap* *clap* |
DemolitionLover363 Killjoy Age: 30 Gender: Female Posts: 33 | Medicine Won't Cure Mankind Why do the heaven’s angels Sleep on through my tears? Why are the forgiving gods So ignorant of my fears? Why does this great world Believe it soothes such pain? When one person feeling it Must hope for relief again. Why does the sun slay From burnt and blackened skies? Why won’t the rain fall When the suffering flower dies? Why does the man pray In the hope of some release? Why does the mother call The baby’s name in howling grief? Why does the child cry In the middle of the night? Why is the black man bad When the good man is always white? Why will the razor-wound flow When the heart can kill so clean? Why does the apple fall But never too far from the tree? And why does the sun slay From burnt and blackened skies? Why won’t the rain fall When the suffering flower dies? Why does the man pray In the hope of some release? Why does the mother call The baby’s name in howling grief? Why does mankind damage Itself for the greater good? And how do we always manage To be so misunderstood? So why does the sun slay From burnt and blackened skies? Why won’t the rain fall When the suffering flower dies? Why does the man pray In the hope of some release? Why does the mother call The baby’s name in howling grief? And why do we survive at all If living is our own defeat? |
DemolitionLover363 Killjoy Age: 30 Gender: Female Posts: 33 | I'm Ready, I'm Set, And I'm Going Nowhere. She takes a sleepy step To the bedroom door The light is hurting her eyes Daybreak outside comes much too early. Memories flood back Of times she couldn't remember And the tears flow down As she struggles to clear her head and think. Lovers part, at the fork in the road And what becomes of the one broken heart? One foot in the door And the other one in her own grave The man in the black coat smiles And plots as he hides in the black of the alley. Watching the bedroom window The ex-boyfriend frowns deeply That fork in the road Never loved him much. |
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