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My Chemical Suicide Story (How MCR Saved My Life)

AuthorMessage
Starlite Decay.
Bleeding on the Floor
Starlite Decay.
Age: 30
Gender: Female
Posts: 1422
June 15th, 2007 at 12:52pm
tidd; zero.:
i watched World Trade Center earlier, and realized something...
if the Trade Centers had never been attacked, My Chemical Romance wouldn't have become a band, and then... how many lives would have been saved (from the ones lost on 9/11) in equivalence to the ones that were saved because of My Chemical Romance?
very confusing, and it's a terrible thought, but just ponder it...
if 9/11 had never occured, My Chemical Romance would never exist. I would have died. Many of you would have too...
but.. since it did, thousands of people have been lost, but from that tragedy something wonderful emerged. A group of 5 amazing men who would rise from the ashes and save some lives.

i think i'm a little fucked up right now. i dunno. i was just thinking.



no
actually i agree with you
and in a kind of wierd messed up way, im glad that happened.
because it gave us MCR and it saved Gerard, and so many others lives.
melodramatic fool
Salute You in Your Grave
melodramatic fool
Age: -
Gender: -
Posts: 2568
June 15th, 2007 at 06:13pm
Argh ij ust wrote something really long andm y in ternet got shut off.
Basically yeah,they saved my life. I( wasn't suicidal but i was/am cutting. And a lot of crap was going down. When i first heard them it was like "wow,this music is saying thingbs that I"M saying"
You can lsiten to them when you're sad
When you're happy
When you're mad
They've covered every topic and they have a great message that has helped so many people,includig me.

Girl_Anachronism
Joining The Black Parade
Girl_Anachronism
Age: 28
Gender: Female
Posts: 242
June 6th, 2008 at 04:55pm
Similar things have happened to me before.
Anyways, my dad was just insane. I thought we would loose our house becuase of all the stuff he bought, and my mom never stood up for herself. Then, my dad opened up a store, which caused a lot of tension between all of us. My dad kept telling me he was going to send my brother to military school, my mom acted like she hated my dad and my brother was leaving soon. My life just sucked. I also planned my suicide date, I wrote the goodbye letters and I even figured out how I was going to kill myself. But then I heard this song called Welcome to the Black Prade. I was hooked on MCR and they helped me through it. I'm still upset and somedays I still fall asleep hoping I wouldn't wake up when I'd get in another argument with someone. But I've been able to control this stuff by listening to MCR all the time. I'm still that girl dressed in black in the back of the class that no one wants to talk to, but anymore I don't care. I'm just happy I'm still here spending the rest of my days rockin out (yeah, I stole that from Desert Song).
xxI_Love_Gerardxx
Killjoy
xxI_Love_Gerardxx
Age: 29
Gender: Female
Posts: 48
June 6th, 2008 at 05:36pm
Wow.
I TOTALLY get how you feel. I mean, I am going through almost the same thing.

In early 2007, I was at a Girl Scout meeting, and 2 of the girls there (Krystle and Haley) started singing Welcome To The Black Parade. (They don't know all the words, only the beginning.) The leader couldn't get their attention. Then, a few months later, they were singing Teenagers. It was so annoying, but it caught my attention.

Around late October of 2007, I asked my older sister who the song was by, and she gives me this strange look and she goes "My Chemical Romance" in this disgusted tone. So, I went on to YouTube and looked them up to see how their songs really sounded. I became addicted.

The thing about this is, I have always hated my life. But early 2007, a nice lady named Nicole came into my life. She used to work with my dad, and she was trying to help my dad take care of my sister and I, seeing as my sister and I (by court orders) am not allowed any contact with my mother.

Nicole pointed out all of the flaws in the way that my sister and I were being treated, ( most of which was child abuse) and tried to help. But my dad got angry at her, (because he hates being corrected) and everything ended up as one huge mess. I was just ready to kill myself. My dad was being worse than ever, plus, my grades were falling.

All he wants me to be is some prissy perfect maid who will wait on him hand and foot and also get straight A's in the bargain. Everyone in my class (Including my best friend) hates me because all I ever do is complain about my life.

That was when MCR came in. In late March / early April, (I don't remember which) my sister and I biked down to the store and bought The Black Parade. As I was listening to the music and reading the lyrics, I started to realize what the songs actually meant. It didn't make my problems go away, but it made me feel as I could actually make it thought them.

About a month or so later, my sister and I went back to the store and bought I Brought You My Bullets, You Brought me Your Love. The CD had the same effect on me, except it seemed stronger this time. Which was a good thing, because my life was getting worse. (And still is.) I was (and still am) cutting, but it didn't seem to do anything for me. My family and friends don't know about me cutting, and if my dad found out, I am one hundred percent sure that he would throw me into the street. The musuc helped me contemplate everything that was wrong in my life, and has helped me through it.



I truly believe that if it weren't for Gerard and the gang, I really would have committed suicide by now.That's how many problems I have. And if the store had Three Cheers For Sweet Revenge, I would own that by now too. The only thing that sucks about it is, I can't tell my dad about the CD's. (He would snap them in half.)

So thanks, Gerard! I LOVE YOU GUYS!!!!! hug Mr. Green
xxI_Love_Gerardxx
Killjoy
xxI_Love_Gerardxx
Age: 29
Gender: Female
Posts: 48
June 6th, 2008 at 05:36pm
Wow.
I TOTALLY get how you feel. I mean, I am going through almost the same thing.

In early 2007, I was at a Girl Scout meeting, and 2 of the girls there (Krystle and Haley) started singing Welcome To The Black Parade. (They don't know all the words, only the beginning.) The leader couldn't get their attention. Then, a few months later, they were singing Teenagers. It was so annoying, but it caught my attention.

Around late October of 2007, I asked my older sister who the song was by, and she gives me this strange look and she goes "My Chemical Romance" in this disgusted tone. So, I went on to YouTube and looked them up to see how their songs really sounded. I became addicted.

The thing about this is, I have always hated my life. But early 2007, a nice lady named Nicole came into my life. She used to work with my dad, and she was trying to help my dad take care of my sister and I, seeing as my sister and I (by court orders) am not allowed any contact with my mother.

Nicole pointed out all of the flaws in the way that my sister and I were being treated, ( most of which was child abuse) and tried to help. But my dad got angry at her, (because he hates being corrected) and everything ended up as one huge mess. I was just ready to kill myself. My dad was being worse than ever, plus, my grades were falling.

All he wants me to be is some prissy perfect maid who will wait on him hand and foot and also get straight A's in the bargain. Everyone in my class (Including my best friend) hates me because all I ever do is complain about my life.

That was when MCR came in. In late March / early April, (I don't remember which) my sister and I biked down to the store and bought The Black Parade. As I was listening to the music and reading the lyrics, I started to realize what the songs actually meant. It didn't make my problems go away, but it made me feel as I could actually make it thought them.

About a month or so later, my sister and I went back to the store and bought I Brought You My Bullets, You Brought me Your Love. The CD had the same effect on me, except it seemed stronger this time. Which was a good thing, because my life was getting worse. (And still is.) I was (and still am) cutting, but it didn't seem to do anything for me. My family and friends don't know about me cutting, and if my dad found out, I am one hundred percent sure that he would throw me into the street. The musuc helped me contemplate everything that was wrong in my life, and has helped me through it.




I truly believe that if it weren't for Gerard and the gang, I really would have committed suicide by now.That's how many problems I have. And if the store had Three Cheers For Sweet Revenge, I would own that by now too. The only thing that sucks about it is, I can't tell my dad about the CD's. (He would snap them in half.)

So thanks, Gerard! I LOVE YOU GUYS!!!!! hug Mr. Green
vampire kitteh :3
Thinking Happy Thoughts
vampire kitteh :3
Age: 27
Gender: Female
Posts: 429
June 8th, 2008 at 04:17pm
where do i start? hhhmmmm....


its kind of a backwards story but here it goes:
well all my life ive been this happy, unaware little kid. then i got older, realizing the problems in this world and caring so much what others thought of me. i was trying to fit in all the time, letting people walk all over me just so that they would like me. funny, before this year, i only knew of MCR through my mom (shes a fan) 'my chemical romance' was just a strange band name to me. theyr dark clothes and just the names of the songs kinda freaked me out lol. i later got into rock music, along with trying to 'be cool' and i listened to some hip hop and disney crap. i know, pathetic. anyway, so i guess it was puerberty that really changed my attitude at first. i became depressed, and suicidal. i went from pink and frilly to black anti-frills. haha. my grades dropped. anyway, so that was a period in my life that may have lasted like 3 months. then i became sorta glued to the internet and thats really how i 'found' MCR. i became obssessed Tehe and it didnt take long lol. so i heard their story. i found new hope. i live by gerard's advice now: "be yourself, dont take anyone's shit and never let them take you alive..." they saved me. and i will never forget it. i would seriously die for them.... thats how much i care. In Love

and then theres this miracle that happened a few weeks or so ago:

i was so depressed that day. i was seriously considering suicide and it was all i could think about all day. killing myself.... so then when i got home from school my mom told me that the sound on our computer was fixed. so of course the first thing i was gonna do was go on youtube and find LOTMS (someone posted it yay) and of course watch it Mr. Green and that just changed everything. i really listened to the music and their message. and the part where gerard talked about his drug addiction and being suicidal... it was a miracle. i swear. the weird thing is that the sound on my computer had mysteriously stopped working and was out for months. it just decided to start working that day where i needed help. that is a miracle.... dont ya think?




http://thankyoumcr.net/static/yourstory/ <---- you can tell your story on here if you want to Smile
Nothing_At_All
Killjoy
Nothing_At_All
Age: 29
Gender: Female
Posts: 94
June 8th, 2008 at 07:20pm
I love reading all of the stories on here, it makes me feel less alone. I once battled depression, self-harm, and bulimia. I had no friends, no one to turn to, no one serious enough to just listen. Everyday at school I was bullied for being overweight and bisexual. I felt like there was no one who felt like I felt. After finding myself in the counselor's office explaining a shitload of scars I realized that I needed to help myself. I found myself listening to MCR a lot more and realizing that it wasn't just me, that there were other people who hurt like I did and healed like I needed to. I researched the band, and found some quotes that further deepened my love. I've relapsed a couple of times, but every time, I put it behind me and grow stronger. I know that it doesn't matter what those bitches at my old school thought (oh yes, I've moved) because I've got supportive friends now and five heroes who love me. I can honestly say that this band has saved my life, and will continue to do so till the end of my days.

These are some of the most influential quotes:
"Everyone should love themselves. Like I love you all."

"Hey, girls, you're beautiful. Don't look at those stupid magazines with sticklike models. Eat healthy and exercise. That's all. Don't let anyone tell you you're not good enough. You're good enough, you are too good. Love your family with all your heart and listen to it. You are gorgeous, whether you're a size 4 or 14. It doesn't matter what you look like on the outside, as long as you're a good person, as long as you respect others. I know it's been told hundreds of times before, but it's true. Hey, girls, you are beautiful."
Woodstock '69
Jazz Hands
Woodstock '69
Age: 28
Gender: Female
Posts: 344
July 5th, 2008 at 05:40pm
Crying or Very sad these are really sad and depressing but also heartwarming
Woodstock '69
Jazz Hands
Woodstock '69
Age: 28
Gender: Female
Posts: 344
July 5th, 2008 at 05:48pm
Leper Messiah.:
tidd; zero.:
i watched World Trade Center earlier, and realized something...
if the Trade Centers had never been attacked, My Chemical Romance wouldn't have become a band, and then... how many lives would have been saved (from the ones lost on 9/11) in equivalence to the ones that were saved because of My Chemical Romance?
very confusing, and it's a terrible thought, but just ponder it...
if 9/11 had never occured, My Chemical Romance would never exist. I would have died. Many of you would have too...
but.. since it did, thousands of people have been lost, but from that tragedy something wonderful emerged. A group of 5 amazing men who would rise from the ashes and save some lives.

i think i'm a little fucked up right now. i dunno. i was just thinking.



no
actually i agree with you
and in a kind of wierd messed up way, im glad that happened.
because it gave us MCR and it saved Gerard, and so many others lives.
I was thinking about that too The teen suicide rate would be higher then it already is...The bottom line is. these men are nothing less then miracles. Thank god for them.
soylatte
Killjoy
soylatte
Age: 36
Gender: Female
Posts: 7
July 19th, 2008 at 10:56am
when i was 14 i started to cut myself it lasted about 6months, i got put into a group home because of family problems etc. i started to cut myself again when i was 16-17 and it ended last year in November (i'm 20 now almost 21) during the time i was hurting myself by cutting i had a addiction to xanax which started before i knew about gerard's problem he used to have with it..thats right i didn't copy him. xanax is powerful stuff i took it because i couldn't feel pain when i took way to much of it. it took the pain away from cutting completely....PLEASE DON'T THINK THIS IS A GOOD IDEA IF YOU SELF HARM...TRUST ME IT MAKES THINGS WORSE.
last year i was put into icu because i was in a coma due to od'ing on xanax and trying to hang myself. i was home alone at the time it happened and was so off my face i had no clue what i was doing. the xanax made me suicidal it was horrible. i was in a coma for 2 days after the OD/hanging. when i woke up i had tubes everywhere it was horrible, my eyes were really puffy and i had a mark around my neck from the rope. i spent a week in a psychiatric ward then i went home. soon after that i found an interview with gerard from norway it was about me, not what happened recently but what happend when i saw them live. it broke my heart and ever since then i have felt guilty because if gerard knew about the whole hospital thing it would break his heart as well and when i saw MCR in concert i knew i broke his heart by my scars.

my video:
http://au.youtube.com/watch?v=FIdqS3qJWUU
Haley_Attack326
Killjoy
Haley_Attack326
Age: 29
Gender: Female
Posts: 23
July 26th, 2008 at 01:41pm
MCR changed my life dramatically. When I was in 4th grade my best friend Jim who was in 6th grade commited suicide. I loved him so much and he was my best best friend. When I got to 6th grade I started cutting myself, and over a period of time it got worse and worse. Then I saw the WTTBP video on youtube. Watching them in that video made me break down and cry. I remembered that my sister had gotten Revenge a long time ago. I took it from her room and played it for two days straight. I finally found myself in the heap people called, Haley. I got over Jim's suicide, and I stopped cutting my wirsts, then I watched LOTMS, and it changed my whole perspective on the world. Now if I'm listening to MCR and I don't understand something they say, then I have to go look at the lyrics or go look at the meanings behind the song. I remember I was listening to Heaven Help Us and it makes me sad for Gerard. He's so afraid, but then I remind myself that Gerard said that you always have to make something a happy ending, even if the world is ending.
Person0001
Always Born a Crime
Person0001
Age: 43
Gender: Female
Posts: 5099
July 26th, 2008 at 01:50pm
You are all very, very brave for sharing your stories, and I am very proud of you guys for finding the strength to overcome. If only we could put these all into a book (anonymously of course) and ship them off to the Daily Mail - I wonder what they'd say then?
Woodstock '69
Jazz Hands
Woodstock '69
Age: 28
Gender: Female
Posts: 344
July 26th, 2008 at 01:51pm
Deb:
You are all very, very brave for sharing your stories, and I am very proud of you guys for finding the strength to overcome. If only we could put these all into a book (anonymously of course) and ship them off to the Daily Mail - I wonder what they'd say then?
AMEN!!!!
IeroNugget
Killjoy
IeroNugget
Age: 32
Gender: Female
Posts: 25
July 26th, 2008 at 03:19pm
Mine is very long, and you dont have to read it, but here it is:

In the 6th grade I started cutting. It made my day go by much faster knowing that when I got home I could cut, as lame as that sounds.
So I went 3 years cutting and not telling anyone. Over the years it got worse and I slipped deeper into depression.

I had listened to MCR before but when 3 cheers came out I was MCR crazy, like a lot of people. They made me feel like there some hope in the world for me.
I went on feeling a little better about my life. Until one day when the entire world felt like it would collapse on me.
That night I sat down and planned to kill myself.

The next day, I guess you could say I prepared myself. I sat in my room, writing the letters that I would leave on my bed. Looking at old pictures of everyone, Going through things that I wanted to leave to people.

I went into the bathroom and cut the tub water on, I turned the radio on and let the water get warm. I got in with my two razor blades.

I had the radio on a local station. They never played My Chem that much but when they did it was only like "I'm Not okay" or something like that. "Cemetery Drive" started playing and to this day I still swear its not a coincidence. I sat there in the blood soaked water and listened to that song like I had never listened before. I had the razor in my hand and I was squeezing on it so hard it was cutting into my hand.

Gerard sang "Back home, off the run. Singing songs that make you slit your wrists it isn't that much fun. Staring down a loaded gun, So I wont dying, wont stop lying, if you want ill keep on crying did you get what you deserve is this what you always want me for?"

At that moment, that song, that one line, meant so much to me. I felt like MCR had made that song for me, almost like they knew there would one girl in her bathtub waiting to die that needed to hear that one line, of that one song. To this day I get chills when I listen to it.
After that I got out of the tub and went and called one of my friends, I told her everything and she helped me tell my mom and I got help, I haven't cut since then.

I know they saved a lot of peoples lives, and that I don't have a special story, but to me they mean the world to me. My Chemical Romance has eternal thanks from me.

They saved my life, and keep on saving it, everyday, every hour, every minute. They keep me going and keep my head up throughout everyday.

If My Chemical Romance ever got ahold of this I would want them to know that they are heroes. My heroes, and a thousand other kids heroes. They need to be recognized for this. It needs to be noticed. They deserve it, and kids around the world need to know that they're here for one reason, and one reason only. To save lives, and I am living proof that they do.
yousawnothing
Jazz Hands
yousawnothing
Age: -
Gender: Female
Posts: 308
November 12th, 2008 at 08:33am
My story isn't nearly as bad as some here, but MCR really have impacted my life. I wouldn't be the person I am now without them.

I first saw them in the Famous Last Words video a few years ago, when everything wasn't too bad, but life was about to take a severe turn for the worse in my family.

I thought they were really creative, but I didn't really listen to the songs or anything until about six months later. My parents were arguing non-stop, mum would yell and throw things; I'd had two years of being really badly bullied at my second school which wrecked my self-esteem and I was being totally excluded from everything at my third school; my grandpa had just died of cancer on Easter Day, and my dad was getting severely depressed and suicidal. I felt worthless, like nobody cared apart from a couple good friends who I practically never saw since I board at a different school to them. I thought I was going to do nothing with my life, end up stuck in a rut with no good family, friends or boyfriend, since none at my school paid me any attention cause they were all for the popular people (seeing as it was a small year, everyone apart from me). I had no confidence and believed all the shit people said about me; that I was a disturbed antisocial nerd with no friends and so on.

Then the same friend who made me watch the videos gave me a mix CD with The Sharpest Lives, Thank You For The Venom, To The End and Disenchanted on it. I listened to it non-stop, but I didn't figure out they were the same band I'd already seen until I saw TBP CD when I was randomly browsing in a music store. I went out and bought it straightaway, then came back two days later and got Bullets and Revenge.

They were addictive from day one; I just kept playing them more and more until they were my all-time favourite band. I loved the way the lyrics made me feel; like I wasn't in it alone, and they'd been through the same kinda shit as me and they'd got through it. The message of hope really got to me.

My parents were sick of the music, they tried hiding my CDs but that didn't work, and in the end they gave up, cause I'd never been into anything this much before. I didn't think anything could pull me out of the dark place I was in, but they managed it, and I'll be eternally grateful. MCR gave me a way out, a reason to believe things could get better, could work out okay in the end.
Gerard.
Banned
Gerard.
Age: 32
Gender: Male
Posts: 1463
November 12th, 2008 at 10:08am
xxI_Love_Gerardxx:
Wow.
I TOTALLY get how you feel. I mean, I am going through almost the same thing.

In early 2007, I was at a Girl Scout meeting, and 2 of the girls there (Krystle and Haley) started singing Welcome To The Black Parade. (They don't know all the words, only the beginning.) The leader couldn't get their attention. Then, a few months later, they were singing Teenagers. It was so annoying, but it caught my attention.

Around late October of 2007, I asked my older sister who the song was by, and she gives me this strange look and she goes "My Chemical Romance" in this disgusted tone. So, I went on to YouTube and looked them up to see how their songs really sounded. I became addicted.

The thing about this is, I have always hated my life. But early 2007, a nice lady named Nicole came into my life. She used to work with my dad, and she was trying to help my dad take care of my sister and I, seeing as my sister and I (by court orders) am not allowed any contact with my mother.

Nicole pointed out all of the flaws in the way that my sister and I were being treated, ( most of which was child abuse) and tried to help. But my dad got angry at her, (because he hates being corrected) and everything ended up as one huge mess. I was just ready to kill myself. My dad was being worse than ever, plus, my grades were falling.

All he wants me to be is some prissy perfect maid who will wait on him hand and foot and also get straight A's in the bargain. Everyone in my class (Including my best friend) hates me because all I ever do is complain about my life.

That was when MCR came in. In late March / early April, (I don't remember which) my sister and I biked down to the store and bought The Black Parade. As I was listening to the music and reading the lyrics, I started to realize what the songs actually meant. It didn't make my problems go away, but it made me feel as I could actually make it thought them.

About a month or so later, my sister and I went back to the store and bought I Brought You My Bullets, You Brought me Your Love. The CD had the same effect on me, except it seemed stronger this time. Which was a good thing, because my life was getting worse. (And still is.) I was (and still am) cutting, but it didn't seem to do anything for me. My family and friends don't know about me cutting, and if my dad found out, I am one hundred percent sure that he would throw me into the street. The musuc helped me contemplate everything that was wrong in my life, and has helped me through it.



I truly believe that if it weren't for Gerard and the gang, I really would have committed suicide by now.That's how many problems I have. And if the store had Three Cheers For Sweet Revenge, I would own that by now too. The only thing that sucks about it is, I can't tell my dad about the CD's. (He would snap them in half.)

So thanks, Gerard! I LOVE YOU GUYS!!!!! hug Mr. Green


i know how you feel my dad used to always tell me to stay in my room as soon as i got home from school and i was never allowed to go out
one day he was out drinking so i snuck out tomy friends house and stayed there for about 2 weeks thats when i got the MCR cd's so when i got back he was all worried about me and he thought i ran away he also said that he told the police i was missing
so he kept to what he ususally did kept me to my room i always had music on in my room before i was at my friends but this was different the music made me think the way i was living and that there IS worse and now my dad lets me go out everyday.....
Helena of Sorrows
Fabulous Killjoy
Helena of Sorrows
Age: 34
Gender: Female
Posts: 133
November 12th, 2008 at 09:51pm
well. before, when i was still much younger than i am now..i used to be a happy girl. i dont care about the world, just a normal kid who enjoys her life.
but then everything changes when i was in the 6th grade. i became more aware of the problems my family was going through then. and totally became aware about life and its hard parts.
then i was in high school. my high school life was totally miserable for me. i was always picked on by those students whose head contains nothing but space. that actually affected me alot. before, i used to have high self-esteem, but then i totally lost in when i was in highschool. i was bullied until 4th year highschool.
the psychological effect of bullying plus the emotional effects of the constant fighting of my mother and father, resulted with me thinking of commiting suicide. i started cutting. i always thought that no one loves me, so no one would care if i died.
i didnt go to college for two years. these was the time that MCR came into my life. i saw the video of WTTBP. i listened to the message. because, i was always at home then, i researched about them. i read lots of stories about them, read the lyrics of their songs i once knew but never cared and the ones i didnt know. i got connected into them. i suddenly felt that i became a better person, after hearing their music, and hearing their personal struggles in life and how'd they survived it.
their words, their lyrics, and their songs gave me strength.
though sometimes, i still have the feeling of going to sleep and never woke up, and the feeling of still taking my life., but then whenever i felt that way, i just listen to them, and it totally ease my mind.
the MCRmy also helped get through with it.
so cheers for MCR!!
NewHairSameShit.
Thinking Happy Thoughts
NewHairSameShit.
Age: -
Gender: Female
Posts: 545
November 14th, 2008 at 07:31pm
They have helped me in similiar ways to some of yours. This band, along with yes, an animal, (my pony Candy) helped me out of serious long-term depression and feelings of worthlessness. I was tormented, attacked, and got beat up by some kid at school and ridiculed by this person's friends and everyone else. I was an EXTREMELY unstable kid, I still am at times. I have Obsessive-Compulsive Disorder but my dad refuses to acnolage(sp?) this. After about 4th or 5th grade, I couldn't fit in at school, no matter how hard I tried. My parents were "divorced" (they were never technically "married" in the first place) for a long time. I have no memories of my mother at my house and very few from my younger childhood. She lived in Florida until a few years ago when (thank Geesus) she moved to Ohio. I see her a lot more now, but still not enough. My dad doesn't understand having a girl child. He's only ever had a son.
Anyway, I fell deeply in love with this boy in 3rd grade. He is the most beautiful person I've ever known. In 3rd grade, I got along with him pretty well. Sang to him at school, talked to him. But in the following years, things turned worse. Around that time, a new kid came to our school. This person wasn't very cool, so I befriended her. I was extremely popular, like a Queen of sorts at my school. Thus she gained status and eventually turned on me. The boy whom I still dearly, dearly, love did the same. They ridiculed me for years. On 2 seperate occasions, she beat me up after school. I was a passifist. I became hard and cruel after those years. I blame that period in my life for turning me into a bitch. I have attempted suicide a few times. Even still recently. I argue with my dad a lot. But MCR came onto the scene a few years ago. The boy I love started doing drugs and such, and my best friend from a different school completely changed. But she got me into MCR. I finally stopped worrying about fitting in, as in my past failed attempts. I grew into being someone I can tolerate. My mom was a fan of MCR from Revenge and I remember the first time seeing them on television. They were live and I'm pretty sure they played INO. I liked them, but I never knew that these weird rocker dudes and one with "COOL HAIR!" (Ray) would turn out to save my life.

I saw them live August 2007. 3 days later I took Candy to her first and my millioneth horseshow. I loved this pony so much and still do. I named her Taste The Rainbow in honor of the MCR Skittles-thing.<3 I've always loved horses, and I love MCR. My life finally came together and reached a turning point that it badly needed. I was given Candy as a Christmas present on December 22, exactly 4 months after the date of my Project Rev show. I also have a 'new' best friend that rides her pony at the same place as I do. We both like MCR, and we talk about the boy I still love all of the time. I obviously never got a chance with him. He's toned it down, even though he can still be harsh. Currently, he doesn't go to our school. But MCR has helped me not worry as much, and remember that no matter what, there is always a future.

[italics]Carry on.[/italics]

(Sorry for the novel!!)
Blooregard Q. Kazoo
Motor Baby
Blooregard Q. Kazoo
Age: 30
Gender: Female
Posts: 917
November 15th, 2008 at 10:27pm
MCR didn't save me.
They made me more open-minded, and not to judge people before I know them, not to be Homophobic, (Cuz it's gay heh)
and they made me be myself, more.
And not care what other people think of me, I freely listen/wear/do anything I like without thinking "what will dadada think," I just do it xD.
Incognito.
Bleeding on the Floor
Incognito.
Age: 29
Gender: Female
Posts: 1209
November 15th, 2008 at 10:57pm
Man this is so sad reading all of these stories!
you guys so so amazing talking about this stuff!
all I can say is Thank God For MCR!
xo