How i waste my summer days

Wasted Summer Days

I used to be able to write
Brilliant metaphors and pretty verses
Now my notebook is filled
With dumb ideas about you

As I sit here I can see my thighs
My leggings clinging to the fat
I loathe it and cover the rest
With a baggy gym shirt

I picked up a pencil to write this with
I was blunt so i sharpened it
And i realized that I sharpen my pencil
with the same razorblade I cut myself with

The Horrors are serenading me
Therapy in my boombox
One of the only things left to make me happy
On these wasted summer days

awesome dude =]

thanks you guys, it means a lot

Kristen

"Seriously" never seemed so cruel
All you wanted was cool shoes
Your hair hangs in your eyes
And I would console you
But you don't know me

You seem alien to me sometimes
And I think it's strange
You still call her
"Your best friend"
But was she ever?

All those good times
were full of spite
towars kids like me
But now you love me
Do you understand why it kills me?

okay, just some background info:
Next to my bed i have pictures taped to the wall and they are my reasons to get up in the morning.
Conor Oberst is one of them, so that's who I'm talking about.
I idolize him and adore his way with words, this is like a response to his effect on me.

Conor is Staring Again

Conor is Staring at me
And sometimes it's hard to believe
He's one of the reasons
I get out of bed every morning

A song can tear my heart out
with blood and arteries and chuncks of flesh
lying at my feet
and pain
where my most vital organ used to be

Even if your heart lies on the floor
Your ears are still attached
to the sides of your head
you can still hear
but are you listening?

Conor is still staring
slightly mocking
"yes, Mr. Oberst, I am aware
that your lyrics are better"

Conor stop staring!
your eyes will start tearing
just like your music
keps tearing at my chest!

How do the chords and the voices
keep me alive?
I'm missing my heart
I want it back,
but at the same time
I'm not sure I want to stop this track

Conor is staring at me
And sometimes it's hard to believe
he's one of the reasons
i get out of bed every morning

books

Yes, I can read you like a book
and my pages are wide open too
do you want to read the chicken scrawl
on my pages?

My cover is a skin
with new wounds and scratches
and scars from the past
I've been passed from hand to hand
these scars are a result of love
i guess

My words get long and drawn out
and sometimes you want to stop reading
but you need to know the ending
so you stick with me

I have pages upon pages
is it poetry?
Am i written by Stephen King?
Or am I more like Charlie?

If i ripped my pages out
and hid them from you
would you still try to uncover
my story in this book?

Food Problems

You're begging, pleading
to get me to eat
but i'm not going to
my body doesn't need it

When i starve I feel.
I feel beautiful
The sun radiates from my heart
and I wam skinny, let me be skinny


If I stick my fingers down my throat
will it all come up?
the greed and the lust?
not just the fudge sundae

I am sitting in my room
I'm not going upstairs
the food is there
waiting to devour me

I just want to see my bones
I want a reason to be flat chested
people will worry, I'll console
i'm okay, no need to fret

I am okay aren't I?

I forgot what these were called... somebody should tell me.
they are the ones that spell stuff going down, they are really fun.


Pathetic
Pain is
All around me
This won't stop
Help. I need you
Everything is going wrong
Tonight is my last
I hope you'll care
Can you keep me near?

Anorexia
All the food
Not enough
Over the limit
Restrict!
Everything makes me sick
Xanthous skin
I won't ever be perfect
Achievement, never

Afraid
Alone in the dark
Frozen still
Read me a story
All I wanted to be
In the tower, a damsel
Distressed, but rescued

Butterfly (Self Harm)
Burning in me
Unknown to them
Taught m enothing
Tonight won't go well
Everything is...
Red
Flowing out of me
Love and hate
You can't get this to stop

Unity in Loop

I am so boring
My days traced on paper
They repeat
Just like the CD in my stereo

Yesterdays and todays
What's the difference?
tomorrows seem far away
but soon my seconds will be slipping

A laugh so manic
turns into a sob
the flam dances on two birthday candles
one slips, the flames become one

Unity seems so beautiful
but what is it?
without twists and knots in the rope
we wouldn't be able to climb it

So we blend together
Our days blend into one long night
what awaits? wee know
the same thing as today

please comment...

Moved from another thread

Hugs; The New Black:

Rosary Beads

My father always wanted me
to be a pretty Catholic girl
who batted her eyelashes and spoke of Jesus
but the result was quite different
I clutch my razorblade
like the poor spanish woman
who comes to church when it's empty
and recites her Hail Marys
over hand-me- down
rosary beads
We have different beads
but we still slave over them
as if they would
actually save us.