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my first

AuthorMessage
ebony thorne
Killjoy
ebony thorne
Age: 24
Gender: Female
Posts: 6
March 20th, 2012 at 07:48am
when you need to scream
but can only cry
when your death is their dream
but you refuse to die
when your hearts on fire
but you say it only aches
and the sound of a choir
is all it takes
to make you smile
to make your heart glow
for at least a while
than it is you that does know
what its like to be me
when I'm sad and cry
but also when the music sets me free
and in it we fly
ebony thorne
Killjoy
ebony thorne
Age: 24
Gender: Female
Posts: 6
March 20th, 2012 at 08:04am
what can you do when your heart can take no more
and the people you trust with you life leave you to die
when people try to hurt you and you have no idea what for
all you can do is curl up and cry

do you let them walk all over you
let them trample you into the earth
no, i amtelling you what to do
you stamd up and make them hurt
never been loved
Thinking Happy Thoughts
never been loved
Age: 20
Gender: Female
Posts: 457
July 11th, 2012 at 12:44pm
you've got good talent
geradsredskittle666
Really Not Okay
geradsredskittle666
Age: 28
Gender: Female
Posts: 610
July 11th, 2012 at 07:05pm
Your poems seem to flow so well...you have a way with words
Orange Em Oh
Killjoy
Orange Em Oh
Age: 24
Gender: Female
Posts: 3
July 14th, 2012 at 03:57pm
The poem is awesome Smile A bit of constructive criticism is that it needs punctuation and a capital letter at the start of each line (sorry for being a grammar nazi but hey, know you know)
Very Happy
Pansy Wayero
Jazz Hands
Pansy Wayero
Age: 29
Gender: Female
Posts: 372
August 6th, 2012 at 06:49am
never apologise for 'doing it wrong' in poetry theres no such thing. Your poems are amazing the words flow so well and im kinda down atm but i read your poems and they really spoke to me. i adored the first poem lots i look forward to seeing more.
padfoot
Killjoy
padfoot
Age: 22
Gender: Female
Posts: 7
November 30th, 2012 at 08:44am
ebony thorne:
when you need to scream
but can only cry
when your death is their dream
but you refuse to die
when your hearts on fire
but you say it only aches
and the sound of a choir
is all it takes
to make you smile
to make your heart glow
for at least a while
than it is you that does know
what its like to be me
when I'm sad and cry
but also when the music sets me free
and in it we fly


this is good


Yes