u ever feel so bad you write poetry?

you beat me up
you put me down
you loved to see
me on the ground

and now this is my life
my best friend is a knife
make sure you get that right
that friend holds me tight
and now well I might
end it all at night
cuz that friend is a user
makes me an abuser
of myself and my heart
which has fallen apart
so fragile it was
now ridden with scars
barely making it through
if only you knew
all the things I can't do
cuz you inflicted such pain
deep down in my veins
it took over my brain

and I'm the only one there
trapped and stuck in despair
when my eyes cannot shut
I just start to cut
into my cold skin
it feels like a sin
yet I can't stop myself
started when I was twelve
and all those words you sent
for your own entertainment
disregarding the blood
that came like a flood
and hit like a shot
they're all that I've got
but you're doing well
just I'm left in hell
you don't know what it's like
you don't know what I hide
how you took all my pride
and you never cared
and you're never scared
because you're not scarred
haven't lost any part
just for me it is hard
and it's your fucking fault
it's those things that you told
and you're not broken
don't care what you've taken
don't think about the past
but my memories last
and never I'll rest
my life is a mess
I'm in constant distress
and you couldn't care less