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Suicide and Self harm

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thank fsm.
In The Murder Scene
thank fsm.
Age: 33
Gender: Female
Posts: 20564
March 16th, 2010 at 01:40pm
biting is still self harming, it just isn't cutting. Same mindset, different action.

And you said earlier that you eventually just accepted this was a part of you...that isn't arming yourself with the tools to be happy. You started off wanting to end it and decided you couldn't.
Coraline.
Thinking Happy Thoughts
Coraline.
Age: 27
Gender: Female
Posts: 493
March 16th, 2010 at 02:45pm
Thats the whole idea of it though.
The plan was to move to less painful things until self harm stopped.

And this is only occasionally,im not someone addicted to self harm anymore.

I have accepted its part of me,and im helping myself,thats my tools to be happy.
Im not someone who's just sitting around in thier own self pity,im actually making a difference in my life.

I've overcome mental illness before on my own,ill do it again.

but to be honest,this isnt about me.
This is about in general how many people are judged and slandered because of thier actions.
But sometimes thier not in the right mind to even think of what thier doing.

I've noticed the disrespect and how unsympathetic people are towards other's with mental illness.
It disgusts me to be honest.
I've witnessed it first hand,actually one of my friends is currently not too happy because i found out she was making jokes about me after i had a breakdown.

It's the most hurtful thing ever,and i know this is offtopic.
but has anyone else experienced this?
Is there any action we could take to stop it?

Ive browsed the internet,books,newspapers,whatever i could think of and ive not really found anything except mental health awareness week or soemthing.
We dont have that where im from.

Id like to do something to make people more aware that suicidal people,people who self harm,people who do anything thats seen as wrong at all with a mental illness,its not really thier fault.
thank fsm.
In The Murder Scene
thank fsm.
Age: 33
Gender: Female
Posts: 20564
March 16th, 2010 at 06:17pm
It's a good thing there are groups out there, like suicide help groups and such, but unfortunately they are usually area-specific and sometimes they are not even helpful. 1-800-SUICIDE is the Hope Line - I bet if teens (or anyone) wanted to help raise awareness in their community, they could shoot an email to Hope Line and see if they had any materials or resources to help out.

Above: I was really treating this whole issue as a generalized thing, which is why so many of my questions were pointed like that. It actually takes a shitload of self awareness to make the changes most people need to make in their lives and to do it effectively. it's NOT easy but it can be done.
Coraline.
Thinking Happy Thoughts
Coraline.
Age: 27
Gender: Female
Posts: 493
March 16th, 2010 at 07:36pm
Your right,it'd be alot easier if everyone knew that though :/

Id really like to get the word out tbh Smile

Anyone with a mental illness now days is either classed as crazy,attention seeking or just plain ridiculous.

I honestly think if people had better understanding of what its like,the amount of work it takes to keep yourself going,theyd be more helpful.

This could stop suicides and self harm,if there was enough moral support,even from strangers,it'd be alot easier for people to admit they need help,itd be alot easier for people to carry on day to day.

I know its not a cure,but its a factor that could help :/
SaM_wUz_HeRe
Killjoy
SaM_wUz_HeRe
Age: 26
Gender: Female
Posts: 2
June 3rd, 2010 at 10:18pm
there is only one person i know who has done stuff like tht and i cn totally see why he does it his parents r assholes and just do bad things to him, i have tried to help but most people dont realize tht some people who cut dont want help or are just too afraid to ask 4 help, so if u know anyone like this i suggest try to help them, be their friend it does help sometimes. bc i used to be like tht real bad but this girl helped meh soo much she was my friend and made it seem like every thing was fine and i got over it. it took a couple years but i got over it. I believe tht if some people who do cut just have tht one really extreme good friend tht will listen to them no matter wat they CAN get through it. and if yooh know someone who does cut try your hardest to listen and be their friend, it helps in the long run.
whipstickagostop;
Like Phantoms, Forever
whipstickagostop;
Age: 100
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Posts: 178998
June 4th, 2010 at 01:06pm
SaM_wUz_HeRe:
there is only one person i know who has done stuff like tht and i cn totally see why he does it his parents r assholes and just do bad things to him, i have tried to help but most people dont realize tht some people who cut dont want help or are just too afraid to ask 4 help, so if u know anyone like this i suggest try to help them, be their friend it does help sometimes. bc i used to be like tht real bad but this girl helped meh soo much she was my friend and made it seem like every thing was fine and i got over it. it took a couple years but i got over it. I believe tht if some people who do cut just have tht one really extreme good friend tht will listen to them no matter wat they CAN get through it. and if yooh know someone who does cut try your hardest to listen and be their friend, it helps in the long run.


Well, some people don't believe self injury is a problem, rather a result from a problem. Therefore some people don't believe that you need help for it, like me. I see it simply as just a coping mechanism, not a dangerous issue. It's just frowned upon because it's causing damage to your body.
The Rumor
Awake and Unafraid
The Rumor
Age: 29
Gender: Female
Posts: 11966
June 7th, 2010 at 05:35am
^ It can be a really dangerous issue though. If it goes far enough, you can kill yourself as a result of self-harm.
whipstickagostop;
Like Phantoms, Forever
whipstickagostop;
Age: 100
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June 7th, 2010 at 08:00am
But most of the time it's not dangerous though, if you're not trying to kill yourself. Some people do cut deep, yes, but they rarely die.
Mindfuck
Always Born a Crime
Mindfuck
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Posts: 5614
June 7th, 2010 at 07:25pm
Emilie Autumn.:
Well, some people don't believe self injury is a problem, rather a result from a problem. Therefore some people don't believe that you need help for it, like me. I see it simply as just a coping mechanism, not a dangerous issue. It's just frowned upon because it's causing damage to your body.
If you you don't see it as a problem and don't want help for it, don't get help. But I don't see why you'd apply that to others, especially ones you don't know. If people need help, they need help. I needed help, and I got it. I'm still getting it. For me, it wasn't just a coping mechanism, it was blatant self hate and it was destroying my life.

I don't think you should be telling others that it's not a problem and help isn't needed. You can't group all self harmers together and say, "Oh, they're all doing it as a coping mechanism, it's normal".
whipstickagostop;
Like Phantoms, Forever
whipstickagostop;
Age: 100
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Posts: 178998
June 7th, 2010 at 08:46pm
Mindfuck:
If you you don't see it as a problem and don't want help for it, don't get help. But I don't see why you'd apply that to others, especially ones you don't know. If people need help, they need help. I needed help, and I got it. I'm still getting it. For me, it wasn't just a coping mechanism, it was blatant self hate and it was destroying my life.

I don't think you should be telling others that it's not a problem and help isn't needed. You can't group all self harmers together and say, "Oh, they're all doing it as a coping mechanism, it's normal".
If the self injurer needed help because it was not a coping mechanism, then fine, he/she should be able to seek help. But for the most part, what I've seen on sites and in person, it is just for coping. Just like counting to 10, running, screaming in a pillow, etc. But those don't work for some people, they don't work for me, so obviously they wouldn't work for other people, too. I'm not putting every self injurer into this, because some people do think they need help, but from what I've seen a lot are just coping. I am pro self injury, yes, therefore I don't see it as a problem. If it helps you, then keep doing it. If you want to quit, then try to quit. I don't really care. I see it as something normal.

I also believe that when someone self injures, they are ashamed because of how society looks at it. They shouldn't be ashamed because it's who they are. They shouldn't try to hide it because of what people might think. Therefore they think something's wrong with them when someone calls them names like "attention seeker" and they feel they must stop, even if it does help them.
thank fsm.
In The Murder Scene
thank fsm.
Age: 33
Gender: Female
Posts: 20564
June 8th, 2010 at 12:38am
There are healthy ways of coping and unhealthy ways of coping. There is a reason that your body reacts to injury the way it does. The human body reacts adversely to the skin being breached because it is not healthy. Beyond that, it becomes an addiction, and I'm sure we can agree getting drunk will not help problems get better, so how can self injury help?

Mindfuck and I agree on very little, but I can definitely agree that you should not go around attesting that people may not need help. It isn't just about DYING. That's not what anyone's saying.

Not everyone is ashamed because they're called an "attention seeker." They may be ashamed because they know their loved ones are hurt by seeing them hurt. Knowing that they caused that pain to their loved ones can be shameful too, if one stops paying all of one's attention to oneself.
whipstickagostop;
Like Phantoms, Forever
whipstickagostop;
Age: 100
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June 8th, 2010 at 01:29pm
I was using attention seeker as an example, thank you very much. That's not the only reason someone might be ashamed. I'm not fucking stupid. But they shouldn't worry about their family. If it hurts them, whatever. It also hurts them if you don't go to college or get a successful job. Why should self injury be any different?

I know it's not just about dying. Every time I've cut myself, I had no intention of dying right then and there.
Lovesick Melody.
Bulletproof Heart
Lovesick Melody.
Age: 81
Gender: Female
Posts: 25760
June 9th, 2010 at 05:24am
Emilie Autumn.:
I was using attention seeker as an example, thank you very much. That's not the only reason someone might be ashamed. I'm not fucking stupid. But they shouldn't worry about their family. If it hurts them, whatever. It also hurts them if you don't go to college or get a successful job. Why should self injury be any different?

I know it's not just about dying. Every time I've cut myself, I had no intention of dying right then and there.


No swearing is allowed in the discussion boards. And she never called you stupid. If you want respect on these boards, please respect others.

And to me it seems pretty... I don't want to use the word selfish, its so ugly, but that's what it seems like. It's like you want self injury to hurt your family. And yes it does hurt them if you don't go to college or get a job, but that doesn't justify cutting as acceptable.
whipstickagostop;
Like Phantoms, Forever
whipstickagostop;
Age: 100
Gender: Female
Posts: 178998
June 9th, 2010 at 07:59am
Lovesick Melody.:


No swearing is allowed in the discussion boards. And she never called you stupid. If you want respect on these boards, please respect others.

And to me it seems pretty... I don't want to use the word selfish, its so ugly, but that's what it seems like. It's like you want self injury to hurt your family. And yes it does hurt them if you don't go to college or get a job, but that doesn't justify cutting as acceptable.


I see people swear on here all the time Disgust Read the page before this...

I'm just saying I don't care if it hurts my family. It's my choice, my life, my body. Not theirs.

Tattoos and piercings are considered a form of self injury, but how come those are acceptable when cutting isn't? It just seems a little hypocritical.
Jenny.
Moderator
Jenny.
Age: 27
Gender: Female
Posts: 19720
June 9th, 2010 at 10:45am
No swearing on the discussion board.
thank fsm.
In The Murder Scene
thank fsm.
Age: 33
Gender: Female
Posts: 20564
June 9th, 2010 at 12:59pm
Emilie Autumn.:
I was using attention seeker as an example, thank you very much. That's not the only reason someone might be ashamed. I'm not fucking stupid. But they shouldn't worry about their family. If it hurts them, whatever. It also hurts them if you don't go to college or get a successful job. Why should self injury be any different?

I know it's not just about dying. Every time I've cut myself, I had no intention of dying right then and there.


-sigh-

I never claimed that you were stupid, though I do get awfully tired of having to explain that I am not insulting anyone, since nobody else has ever seemed to take issue with the way I come across in these boards. None of these discussions will become personal unless you decide to take them to that level, and even then I am unwilling.

When I make a post, not -everything- I say in that post is directly aimed at you personally simply because I quoted you. I like to elaborate on ideas and facts in the Discussions board with the intention of furthering a discussion and with the assumption that no one will get their panties in a twist about it and think it's a personal attack. I believe that I have always been polite enough that this assumption is logical, but I see that's apparently untrue.

I'd like if we can leave that part alone now and move along, because it is OFF TOPIC. And in the future I'd appreciate if you stopped thinking that my posts are about you, because that is false, whatever your reasons are for thinking otherwise.

As for the yes, selfish idea that you should not care how your family and friends feel about you obtaining injury, really? I think that your analogy is flawed. I would see it more along the lines of your family being concerned and upset that you fell down some stairs and broke your femur, and you caring that they cared, since we are talking about bodily harm here. Regardless, while you and like 0.5% of the world (obviously not a fact, just for the sake of talking) may agree that you shouldn't give a damn how your family feels about your well-being, it is unreasonable to expect the same of others.

That behavior ostracizes and distances family and friends, which are a good support net if you ever actually decide to handle problems, and therefore I believe your recommendation to be unhealthy. I can't fault you for it since it's your choice, but I think that healthy choices only come from experience and self-awareness. Not the half-assed self-awareness where someone knows their flaws and wallows in all the nonsense, but the kind beyond that where you realize that the only way you'll have a happy and fulfilling life (like all 80+ years of it, not the moment in which you're cutting) (and if you live an unhappy life it WILL affect your relationships and the feelings of those around you) is to find some way to actually see that the things people say are healthy, actually ARE.
Lovesick Melody.
Bulletproof Heart
Lovesick Melody.
Age: 81
Gender: Female
Posts: 25760
June 10th, 2010 at 01:57am
Emilie Autumn.:
I'm just saying I don't care if it hurts my family. It's my choice, my life, my body. Not theirs.

Tattoos and piercings are considered a form of self injury, but how come those are acceptable when cutting isn't? It just seems a little hypocritical.

Just because it's you that's doing the harming doesn't mean that it doesn't effect them. That's like saying an abortion won't hurt the man in the relationship because it's not him getting the abortion.

Tattoo's are not meant to be used for self injury. Sure, people may enjoy the pain but that's not what a tattoo is about. You don't get a tattoo to enjoy the feeling of pain, but to get a decorative marking on your skin. Tattoo's aren't destructive because they serve a purpose that isn't about inflicting pain on the self, it's about a picture on the skin.
I mean if we were talking about it technically that self-harm is intentionally harming youself, then sure, Angelina Jolie, Victoria Beckham and Megan Fox self-harm.
Anybody that gets a wax self-harms.
Anyone who plucks their eyebrows self-harms.
Can you see what I mean?

whipstickagostop;
Like Phantoms, Forever
whipstickagostop;
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June 10th, 2010 at 07:59am
Lovesick Melody.:
Just because it's you that's doing the harming doesn't mean that it doesn't effect them. That's like saying an abortion won't hurt the man in the relationship because it's not him getting the abortion.


I didn't say it won't affect them, I just don't care if it does. Call it selfish, whatever, I don't care.

Lovesick Melody.:
Tattoo's are not meant to be used for self injury. Sure, people may enjoy the pain but that's not what a tattoo is about. You don't get a tattoo to enjoy the feeling of pain, but to get a decorative marking on your skin. Tattoo's aren't destructive because they serve a purpose that isn't about inflicting pain on the self, it's about a picture on the skin.
I mean if we were talking about it technically that self-harm is intentionally harming youself, then sure, Angelina Jolie, Victoria Beckham and Megan Fox self-harm.
Anybody that gets a wax self-harms.
Anyone who plucks their eyebrows self-harms.
Can you see what I mean?


Some people self harm because it's pretty, which is what tatoos are. Some people cut themselves just so they have scars, which is basically what a tattoo is, just with ink.

And this isn't related, but Angelina Jolie did self harm when she was younger. Just saying.
Jenny.
Moderator
Jenny.
Age: 27
Gender: Female
Posts: 19720
June 10th, 2010 at 10:24am
No, I disagree. I don't think tattoos are pretty-self harming. Tattoos are art; it is a way of keeping a memory, or expressing oneself. It's like clothing; it shows someone who you are. It's not a way of self-harming, because it's for the tattoo itself and not for the pain.
whipstickagostop;
Like Phantoms, Forever
whipstickagostop;
Age: 100
Gender: Female
Posts: 178998
June 10th, 2010 at 01:10pm
Naoko Mori:
No, I disagree. I don't think tattoos are pretty-self harming. Tattoos are art; it is a way of keeping a memory, or expressing oneself. It's like clothing; it shows someone who you are. It's not a way of self-harming, because it's for the tattoo itself and not for the pain.


I know, I don't think tattoos are self harm, but a lot of people do. I was just saying that a lot of people self harm because they think it's pretty, which is why people get tattoos, and some people self harm to have scars, which could be considered what tattoos are. But I don't think tattoos are a form of self harm at all.