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Suicide and Self harm

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MCRAlwaysInMyHeart
Killjoy
MCRAlwaysInMyHeart
Age: -
Gender: -
Posts: 3
December 14th, 2011 at 05:47pm
It is easier to deal with physical pain than emotional. I think that many people who do cut have serious problems that they do not wish to talk about.
And they do talk about suicide in schools now, or at least how to prevent it. It has become more common with adolescents because of peer pressure, thinking that you have to do this or that to be perfect. More and more people have become obsessed with their body image because of the media, which could be leading to depression and eventually suicide. I believe that there is an alternative to cutting and suicide, but then again, with suicide, nobody thinks- they just act. Cutting is an act of misery where people want the emotional pain to go away. Nobody ever sees or hears about the person who was brave enough to put the gun down and talk.
Heart Attack.
Salute You in Your Grave
Heart Attack.
Age: 32
Gender: Female
Posts: 2274
December 14th, 2011 at 07:52pm
Wolly-san:
Look. I know that yes the world has changed. But in my opinion I do think that some people are doing it just to get attention, because I have met so many people that cut themselves and are always depressed but its not like most of them want to die. No offence, but many people out there wouldn't kill themselves because they do want to stay alive. It doesnt really matter about the problem that made them start in the first place. I just think some people just do it to get sympathy. Sorry, but its the way that I feel about it because I know how they felt and its quite easy to control yourself from cutting yourself so why dont they even try. It annoys me!!!!


While there may be some people that really do cut for attention, you're making quite a few generalizations here. I'm not sure what you're trying to say with the "its not like most of them want to die" statement, but you are right that a lot of time cutters aren't cutting to kill themselves, but just because they don't want to die doesn't mean its not a problem. Its obviously an indication of some underlying problem, unless its being done purely for attention (which even then I would argue that there may be something wrong), and it could potentially escalate into more suicidal behavior or thoughts.

As for the part about it being easy to keep yourself from cutting yourself, I can understand thinking that if you've never really dealt it yourself, but I'm going to have to disagree. There is some evidence that self-harm is actually addictive once you get in the habit of doing it all the time, especially if you are used to cutting as a coping mechanism if you're depressed, have anxiety, etc. I know this isn't a confession thread but I can tell you as a former cutter that it is not that simple to just stop doing it, it takes a lot of self-control and when you're in a place where you're distressed or whatever its difficult to tell yourself no. So I guess what I'm saying is while I know it might be easy to be annoyed by people if you don't understand what's going on, you can't just assume that people are seeking attention and aren't trying to quit when its probably more complicated than that.

I think that sometimes even the people who are cutting themselves don't even realize that its addictive until they get some help and learn a little bit about why they're doing it. I think its an issue that is hard to understand for many people, so I can see why a lot of people just write cutters off as attention seekers, but a little understanding goes a long way.
Wolly-san
Fabulous Killjoy
Wolly-san
Age: 28
Gender: Female
Posts: 101
January 10th, 2012 at 10:26am
Heart Attack.:
Wolly-san:
Look. I know that yes the world has changed. But in my opinion I do think that some people are doing it just to get attention, because I have met so many people that cut themselves and are always depressed but its not like most of them want to die. No offence, but many people out there wouldn't kill themselves because they do want to stay alive. It doesnt really matter about the problem that made them start in the first place. I just think some people just do it to get sympathy. Sorry, but its the way that I feel about it because I know how they felt and its quite easy to control yourself from cutting yourself so why dont they even try. It annoys me!!!!


While there may be some people that really do cut for attention, you're making quite a few generalizations here. I'm not sure what you're trying to say with the "its not like most of them want to die" statement, but you are right that a lot of time cutters aren't cutting to kill themselves, but just because they don't want to die doesn't mean its not a problem. Its obviously an indication of some underlying problem, unless its being done purely for attention (which even then I would argue that there may be something wrong), and it could potentially escalate into more suicidal behavior or thoughts.

As for the part about it being easy to keep yourself from cutting yourself, I can understand thinking that if you've never really dealt it yourself, but I'm going to have to disagree. There is some evidence that self-harm is actually addictive once you get in the habit of doing it all the time, especially if you are used to cutting as a coping mechanism if you're depressed, have anxiety, etc. I know this isn't a confession thread but I can tell you as a former cutter that it is not that simple to just stop doing it, it takes a lot of self-control and when you're in a place where you're distressed or whatever its difficult to tell yourself no. So I guess what I'm saying is while I know it might be easy to be annoyed by people if you don't understand what's going on, you can't just assume that people are seeking attention and aren't trying to quit when its probably more complicated than that.

I think that sometimes even the people who are cutting themselves don't even realize that its addictive until they get some help and learn a little bit about why they're doing it. I think its an issue that is hard to understand for many people, so I can see why a lot of people just write cutters off as attention seekers, but a little understanding goes a long way.
The thruth is I used to cut myself so I know how hard it is to stop. So as long as there is something you care about you just have to think about that one thing and it helps. Kay?
MetalHead
Killjoy
MetalHead
Age: 27
Gender: Male
Posts: 2
January 13th, 2012 at 01:35pm
Yara; wtf...:




What can be done to prevent it?


> They need to first understand the cause of it before deciding to prevent it.
One of the main reason why it's hard to prevent because more people these days take their attention to one person rather than finding the cause of it. By ignoring the cause of it, they are basically ignoring more people who could be suffering from the same exact reason.

> Counselling.


Yara; wtf...:




Who does it affect?


> If they have a younger sibling, then it might affect them.

Yara; wtf...:




How can family members help?


> Family members could try and get involved in their life.
Heart Attack.
Salute You in Your Grave
Heart Attack.
Age: 32
Gender: Female
Posts: 2274
February 20th, 2012 at 10:43pm
Wolly-san:
The thruth is I used to cut myself so I know how hard it is to stop. So as long as there is something you care about you just have to think about that one thing and it helps. Kay?


I'm not trying to attack you but I'm just curious as to why in the first comment I was responding to you were annoyed with people who are cutting because you said its easy to control yourself from cutting, when you just here you said you know its a hard thing to do. I guess I'm just trying to say that not everyone cuts for the same reason, and and some people are going to have a hard time quitting because of that. It does help to have someone or something you care about as motivation to stop, but for someone who is severely depressed or feels that no one would truly care whether they stopped or not, that might not be motivating to them.

And it goes back to the whole addiction thing. I think if more people realized that it can be addictive they would stop judging others who have a problem with cutting, which would in turn make it easier for them to talk about or seek out help hopefully.
John St. John
Shotgun Sinner
John St. John
Age: 32
Gender: Male
Posts: 7145
February 27th, 2012 at 04:51pm
If you cycled back pages to the posts I made in this thread when I was 15/16 and not going on 20, I probably would have wrote something along the lines of "omgg, people don't understand why people cut, they just need help there not all attention seekers!"

My attitude now however, is that theres plenty of help out there. Now more than ever. Being bullied? theres dozens of bullying charities spanning all the different types of bullying. Unsatisfying Homelife? Theres charities such as childline or the samaritans. I do think a factor in people cutting is that they've read that its a thing other people do, people need to start being pro active and start to look at ways to solve or deal with their problems instead of just turning to cutting when things go wrong
inkraven80
Killjoy
inkraven80
Age: -
Gender: -
Posts: 10
March 1st, 2012 at 05:48pm
I have struggled with self harm for 15 years. but i havent done any self harm in a few months. ive been doing great.
SiriuslySmitten
Killjoy
SiriuslySmitten
Age: -
Gender: -
Posts: 3
April 27th, 2012 at 10:51am
Quote
What can be done to prevent it?
Who does it affect?
Why is it more common now than 10-20 years ago?
Are there enough support groups?
How can family members help?


I don't know that it can be prevented. Thinking back to my teenage years, I can't think of anything that would have prevented me from doing it.

I'm an older fan, old enough to be a parent to many of other fans. It is no more prevalent now than it was when I was a teenager/in my 20's. It's just more "out there" now. Think of it this way: how many people there are that do this, and you know about it from the internet. Now think about how it was before the internet. You'd have never known how common it really was.
angelofthemissed
Fabulous Killjoy
angelofthemissed
Age: -
Gender: Female
Posts: 132
June 18th, 2012 at 06:05pm
I think suicide and self- harm can be prevented by parents praising their children regularly starting when they are infants, so kids have higher self- esteems.
I think suicide and self-harm can effect relationships with family and friends and how well the person is doing in school, which really just seems to make it worse
I'm not sure if it is more common now than a decade or two ago.
I think their are enough support groups since this seems to be very common now.
I think by being there for the person and listening and not judging them is how family can help
Lookalivesunhine34
Killjoy
Lookalivesunhine34
Age: 27
Gender: Female
Posts: 6
July 12th, 2012 at 10:46am
suicide and self harm is much more common now than older days. Bullies, and media plays a big part in it too.
My Chemical Kid
Killjoy
My Chemical Kid
Age: 25
Gender: Female
Posts: 33
November 18th, 2013 at 01:36am
Suicide and selffharm i believe are so prone in this society today is because there are so many ways to bully a kid into ruining his or her life. The main way would be cyberbullying. Yes I know this falls in the fault of the bully but i think a parent is at least a little responsible for giving a young kid (ive seen 7 year olds with iphones) a phone with so many abilities as of a smartphone. Giving a young kid a phone and all these social networking accouts just makes them more and more susceptible to bullying than ever before and a young kid wont know how to deal with the bullying and will most likley keep it bottled up inside, which is toxic. Yes, i know being a kid and having all this access and technology is 'cool' and a parent just wants to please their child so they are torn between possibly socially ostracizing their child by not giving them the technology or putting unwanted stress on them by the messed up world of everything that can happen with such a powerful device. With the extra stress load and if the kid is being bullied they might turn to selfharm but some kids are young enough not to know what that is. (although with rising technology...) This day in age suicide rates in kids are crazy outrageous and i think there are easy ways to fix it right infrot of us we just don't want to change. I know I'm young myself and i dont know much, but this is just what I think.
ShelbyIeroWay
Killjoy
ShelbyIeroWay
Age: 25
Gender: Female
Posts: 1
September 23rd, 2014 at 10:57am
Its more common now then it was 10-20 years ago because society buts so much pressure on everyone now to be "perfect"... but in all reality YOU are already perfect and dont have to "fit in" with societies "rules" everyone is beautiful already and you dont have to do anything to change that... If you feel as if you want to self harm please tell anyone who is willing to help you and who you trust....there are many support systems out there my personal favorite happens to be music.. Suicide is NOT the answer for anything...trust me... you think that it will be better if your gone? its not you will hurt everyone that you tried not to...please if you are having suicidal thoughts please contact anyone who will help you
brandleys;
Death Defying
brandleys;
Age: 29
Gender: Female
Posts: 186349
September 24th, 2014 at 11:08pm
To be fair, I think the only reason it seems more popular now is because of the media. If you look at adverts from yesteryear they have emphasis on idealised beauty as well.
Frnk iero.
Awake and Unafraid
Frnk iero.
Age: 30
Gender: Female
Posts: 11747
September 25th, 2014 at 10:12am
I agree with Brandy, but i also think that the kids who are now say 14-22 remember a time where there was a universal teenage depression. There was something dark about 2006/7. Something happened (at least in my area) where everyone just...fell. We all kind of muttled through each day, waiting to go home to our own devices and fall into a stormy sleep.
I'm very interested in knowing what the fuck that was.
Because it seems like there was a natural rise in all of us, to destroy.
roseieroway
Salute You in Your Grave
roseieroway
Age: 27
Gender: -
Posts: 2068
October 29th, 2014 at 12:26pm
I am 17, and I have been suffering with severe depression for the past five years. I believe that society as a whole over-glamorizes suicide and self-mutilation, which makes those of us suffering feel ashamed.
roseieroway
Salute You in Your Grave
roseieroway
Age: 27
Gender: -
Posts: 2068
November 14th, 2014 at 09:55am
/um...what the hell is that?
hunzana
Awake and Unafraid
hunzana
Age: 32
Gender: Female
Posts: 11270
January 30th, 2016 at 12:57pm

I've been severely depressed and suicidal since i was 11. I've been cutting on and off ever since. I have some tattoos covering scars but my entire upper arm is deep scars and i'm even embarrassed to wear tshirts. I've been feeling okay recently so thought i'd be able to admit all this without feeling ashamed.
OurLadyOfDemolition
Killjoy
OurLadyOfDemolition
Age: 23
Gender: Female
Posts: 3
August 5th, 2016 at 09:42pm
I feel like it has to do with the fact that we live in a society where mental illness and self harm is often romanticized. Not to mention that with how strict schooling has become and the pressure that comes attached to choose a life path early on, kids feel like they want something that they can "control". They see self harm as that one thing they control. Almost among the lines of "I can't control all of this bad and stressful stuff happening, but I can control THIS thing that is affecting me."
Personally, that was a major component as to why I was self harming. While I also did have an eating disorder and my body dysphoria was much worse, I mostly did it for the sense of control. When I wasn't eating or I was bruising myself up or even just staving myself from sleep, I thought that I was in control. It hurt me, and I wasn't really in control, but I thought I was. That's how I fell so easily into that cycle of self harm.
As far as preventing and/or stopping self harm goes, it took my friends stepping in and actively helping me. For other people, it took talking to a therapist where they could get a diagnosis and maybe prescription. But no matter what, I feel that the biggest help is always to make it known that there are resources for self harmers or people dealing with thoughts of self harm. Make it a topic that feels like it can be brought up in a safe environment, but also make it clear that there is nothing ever worth hurting or damaging yourself over.
That's all I can really say on the topic.
KirstTheWorst
Killjoy
KirstTheWorst
Age: -
Gender: Female
Posts: 16
April 22nd, 2018 at 06:52pm
I know how it feels to feel suicidal and to self harm and it seems like there is many others who have felt that way too so makes you feel less alone, I've only just came out of hospital due to mental health issues!
v4mpireofsorrow
Joining The Black Parade
v4mpireofsorrow
Age: 20
Gender: Female
Posts: 227
January 2nd, 2020 at 01:04am
nobody is on here anymore but as someone that has struggled , i think self harm and suicide starts off by a spark, something happens that makes you anything but happy (sad,mad,anxious,depressed,suicidal,scared, ect) sometimes people can get over it and then there is the other group that has a more hard time. my personal case it started off as a childhood thing and then bullying and social media and other personal factors played a part. social media today is a huge part and bullying. its just crazy. its also sad (this happend to me so it might not apply or be seen the same as you), but its like two different people can hurt themselves the same way, one person gets pity and sympathy and compassion then the other person is called a freak and that "they should of done it" "nobody likes them anyway". its upsetting. everyone is valid, everyone has purpose and some people do things because they need help and nobody is listening so they act on an urge (not saying attention seeking). i wish people could just care about people. we are all one, every person on this earth is a person. everyone has feelings even if you have anti-social personality disorder where you cant feel sympathy you still have emotions. and social media these days glorify pills, weed, drinks (not judging if you do it im just saying the over use). im grateful that people go to music and then its just really sad when an influence dies from anything, especially suicide because when they are helping you through what you are going through then they go and do what you want its a tough situation. bullying is terrible now a days my brother in 4th grade is talking about kids getting in actual fights and some kid saying he wants to hurt himself. ive been to places with kids and it seems that its getting younger and younger and the bullying is starting at a younger age. i just dont know man i want the world to be a better place genuinely