Polyamorous

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Author	Message
Mindfuck Always Born a Crime Age: - Gender: Female Posts: 5614	May 16th, 2008 at 04:03am aui_adriene: What kind of a realtionship is that? that's not right, right? Love is never for fun ryt? Of course it's right. Just because it doesn't fit the conventional style of what most people call "intimate relationships", it doesn't mean it's not right.
pxieVAMPIREdust Bleeding on the Floor Age: 32 Gender: Female Posts: 1136	May 16th, 2008 at 04:37am ^oh thanks...just getting confused...thanks again...
The?!Society Fabulous Killjoy Age: 32 Gender: Female Posts: 128	May 16th, 2008 at 10:29am I don't know how anyone could be able to handle their partner having another relationship...I would become jealous. But since both of the partners are okay with being 'swingers', I guess that's their problem. But I cannot possibly see how their relationship would hold. How can people stay together if they're only half-committed to each other?
freak_boi Killjoy Age: 32 Gender: Male Posts: 63	May 16th, 2008 at 03:18pm I still dont understand cause i personally, not sayig every one else is. Can only be in love with one person at a time XD Cause would love come into it or would it be just fun/sex? Cause if the partner loved yuo, wouldnt you just be with them? o.o
Mindfuck Always Born a Crime Age: - Gender: Female Posts: 5614	May 16th, 2008 at 07:37pm The?!Society, like all relationships, polyamorous ones would have ups and downs just like monogamous ones. So there is a potential for the relationship to 'fizzle out', so to speak. However, just because there are more than two people in the relationship, it doesn't mean that it's automatically going to "fall apart". And it also doesn't mean they are "half committed" to one an another. It's just as likely to fizzle out as a monogamous relationship. freak_boi, it wouldn't just be "fun/sex" all the time; love would come into a lot of the polyamorous relationships. But no more or no less than a monogamous one. Just because it involves more than two person, it doesn't necessarily mean it's just meaningless sex. Fun and meaningless sex are present in monogamous relationships too. Here's a little bit about polyamory. From polyamory.org: What's polyamory, then? Polyamory means "loving more than one". This love may be sexual, emotional, spiritual, or any combination thereof, according to the desires and agreements of the individuals involved.... "Polyamorous" is also used as a descriptive term by people who are open to more than one relationship even if they are not currently involved in more than one. (Heck, some are involved in less than one.) Some people think the definition is a bit loose, but it's got to be fairly roomy to fit the wide range of poly arrangements out there. But isn't that "cheating"? Nope. According to the OED, cheating means "fraud, deceit, swindling." There's a nice quote from 1532: "The first...ground of Chetinge is...a studdy to seme to be, and not to be in deede." In other words, cheating is to convey through deliberate action the impression that one is of a particular nature while one is, in fact, something quite different. What this boils down to with polyamory is that polyamorous people do not tell partners, lovers, or prospective members of those groups that they are monogamous when in fact they are not -- nor do they allow these people to assume they are monogamous, regardless of how convenient or personally advantageous such assumptions might be. The words "honest", "negotiate", "communication" and "being out" occur frequently in discussions of how polyamory usually works. -- If you want more information on it, go to the website and then to the FAQ section. (:
HEY AMY Salute You in Your Grave Age: 33 Gender: Female Posts: 3503	May 17th, 2008 at 03:47am ^ thanks for the info. even though i still dont agree with it, im glad i know a bit more about it. id rather know about it and not agree then just... outright not agree, know what i mean? thats really interesting how it works though.
Hellia Killjoy Age: 33 Gender: Female Posts: 55	May 17th, 2008 at 07:28am I'm against. It's not normal.
Firegarder Joining The Black Parade Age: 38 Gender: Female Posts: 233	May 17th, 2008 at 07:50am I think it's completely normal. This isn't people cheating on a partner, these are couples (and more of course) who are being completely honest and open with each other. If it works for them, then good for them living the life they want to so they can be happy. I think in the west our culture dictates that monogomy is the only right way to have a relationship, and that's what is normal, but in many other cultures, it's not, and polygamy is quite common. I know that is mostly men having many wives, but I'm pretty sure there are places where women have more than one husband. I'll have to look that up... I don't know if that's going off the point a bit, but it's relevant to me! It is not a lifestyle I would personally choose for myself (I think I'd probably be too jealous!), but I won't judge others if thats what they want/need to be happy.
Mindfuck Always Born a Crime Age: - Gender: Female Posts: 5614	May 17th, 2008 at 08:50am ^Thank goodness someone else is open minded enough to understand it! Helia: I'm against. It's not normal. How is it not normal? Arguably, monogamy is what is not normal. Who said we had to stick to one partner and one partner only?
Ignore Alien Orders Salute You in Your Grave Age: 34 Gender: Female Posts: 2026	May 17th, 2008 at 01:41pm Polyamory is pretty normal, in my book. Most of the people in our society practice serial polyamory anyway, and if you look at divorce rates and the like, it looks like lifelong monogamy isn't exactly the best course of action for a lot of people. Personally I don't know if I could handle it; I have enough trouble dealing with one relationship at a time, thanks. But that's not to say that I think it's abnormal or wrong in any way, and if anyone else wants to have polyamorous relationships, that's just fine by me. There was actually an article in Redbook (...I will read anything when I'm bored...) on different peoples' marriages and one was a couple who had an agreement that they could date outside of their marriage if they wanted to. I might type it up later if I can find it again, it was pretty interesting.
freak_boi Killjoy Age: 32 Gender: Male Posts: 63	May 18th, 2008 at 10:19am techno cocaine.: ^Thank goodness someone else is open minded enough to understand it! Helia: I'm against. It's not normal. How is it not normal? Arguably, monogamy is what is not normal. Who said we had to stick to one partner and one partner only? I'm also glad i know more about it, even though im still not all for the idea XD. But what ever floats your boat i guess, and saying something isnt normal is a wee bit discrimative. Polyamorous people might think we're weird because we choose to have one partner only. Im trying to see both sides now instead of being slightly biassed lol.
Mindfuck Always Born a Crime Age: - Gender: Female Posts: 5614	May 18th, 2008 at 10:26am Yeah, it really depends on your perspective. Some people believe one thing, and some people believe another. Neither side is right or wrong here. (:
freak_boi Killjoy Age: 32 Gender: Male Posts: 63	May 20th, 2008 at 06:07am Its a debate^^ Long as you put your opinion politely or have a really good reason to put it upolitel, its cool XD
lacey;; Always Born a Crime Age: 33 Gender: Female Posts: 5698	May 20th, 2008 at 06:10am Helia: I'm against. It's not normal. nods right on
freak_boi Killjoy Age: 32 Gender: Male Posts: 63	May 20th, 2008 at 06:15am I wouldnt say its 'not normal'. Like the above said, polyamorous people may think the same towards monogomous relationships lol. And, it's also defining normal which is another massive debate lol. But, just live and let live. If you dont like it dont do it=]
Mindfuck Always Born a Crime Age: - Gender: Female Posts: 5614	May 20th, 2008 at 06:30am ^Exactly. Even though I said before that neither side is right or wrong, it does get a bit offensive when people start bluntly saying someone else's lifestyle is "not normal". As a general statement... ...who are you to decide what is "normal"? If you are going to say a particular lifestyle isn't "normal", then at least have the decency to state why you think it's not normal according to you. Otherwise it's not really an argument, is it?
freak_boi Killjoy Age: 32 Gender: Male Posts: 63	May 20th, 2008 at 12:43pm Thank you! lol, was wondering how to say that with out sounding offensive.
girl interrupted. Salute You in Your Grave Age: 29 Gender: Female Posts: 2792	May 20th, 2008 at 05:03pm If everyone in the relationship is fine with it and is a consenting adult, who are we to stop them? I say full steam ahead, if you're comfortable with it.
sweet disposition. Banned Age: 31 Gender: Female Posts: 48272	May 21st, 2008 at 07:25am techno cocaine.: Sorry if this sounds bitchy, but I get quite offended when people call other people's lifestyles "stupid". No, I agree. While it may not be for you, that's fine, but it's other people's choice and they have the right to be respected.
DeathCabCutie Fabulous Killjoy Age: 29 Gender: Female Posts: 153	May 23rd, 2008 at 10:00pm i think if both the people in the relationship are ok with it and the other people they're dating then... sure, why not??

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