This Is How I Disappear

Ok, this is what I get from the song................

I think what I read somewhere above is right! I believe that the song means the patient is dyeing and also for some reason it makes me think his girlfriend or wife is ill as well! Becuase, will all the good girls go to heaven? Maybe im wrong but my other theory is he knows hes going to die and go onto a life in heaven but will his ever so loved girlfriend or wife join him eventually to give him company? Sorry if I have you confused by that! I mean thats just my interpretations and there are many ways to interpret a song!

I was thinking that this song might be about mikey..gerard's brother..about how he would feel lost if mikey left [ie. killed himself or left the band]

The only reason i say this is because i figure that the two of them are close. I read in Alternative Press (around the time of release of my black parade...they were on the cover) an article about the recording of this album and how they recorded in this huge house/mansion somewhere(i forget where) and at the time mikey was gettting really depressed. He eventually came to a crossroad...either i quit the band or i quit living. He decided he needed some time off and he went to get some help (i believed he stayed with the bands attorney) and Gerard was so stressed about mikey leaving (mikey was usually the more happier of the bandmates, always the kind to break the dark silence) and Gerard felt really upset about his leaving and it said in the article that he stopped showering and changing his clothes and would just pace the halls, alone. One day, while walking around (at this point on only a few hours of sleep, mumbling crazy wacko shit....) he heard Ray Toro playing Black Sabbath or something...but Toro was playing it really fast and hard (Gerard knew he was angry) so he went in there, interrupted Toro lonesome Jam session, and asked him to play a few chords while he sang over it (Gerard showed him the specific chords) and thus...Famous Last Words was born.
At this point mikey wasn't allowwed to sleep over at the mansion place (too depressed)but when he came over gerard played the song that he played that night with toro (Which eventually became Famous Last Words). Playing that song really made mikey start feeeling better and the band as a whole....i think maybe that This is how i dissappear is about mikey a little bit (And Without you is how i dissappear/ and live my life alone) because maybe gerard feels if he loses his brother he woul in a way dissappear

live.love.burn.die:

"This Is How I Disappear" follows "Dead!", where the Patient has recently discovered that he is ill, and has a very short time to live. The Patient is in a very scared state of mind. He addresses an unknown person (most likely his lover), telling her that she's virtually all he has, hence the lyric, "and without you is how I disappear, and live my life alone forever now." He is also reflecting on how little people care for him, and how she is the only person who does care for him, hence without her, he is quickly forgotten and disregarded.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/This_Is_How_I_Disappear

I agree, your synopsis seems to be the closest one in my opinion

Still Alive...:

I was thinking that this song might be about mikey..gerard's brother..about how he would feel lost if mikey left [ie. killed himself or left the band]

The only reason i say this is because i figure that the two of them are close. I read in Alternative Press (around the time of release of my black parade...they were on the cover) an article about the recording of this album and how they recorded in this huge house/mansion somewhere(i forget where) and at the time mikey was gettting really depressed. He eventually came to a crossroad...either i quit the band or i quit living. He decided he needed some time off and he went to get some help (i believed he stayed with the bands attorney) and Gerard was so stressed about mikey leaving (mikey was usually the more happier of the bandmates, always the kind to break the dark silence) and Gerard felt really upset about his leaving and it said in the article that he stopped showering and changing his clothes and would just pace the halls, alone. One day, while walking around (at this point on only a few hours of sleep, mumbling crazy wacko shit....) he heard Ray Toro playing Black Sabbath or something...but Toro was playing it really fast and hard (Gerard knew he was angry) so he went in there, interrupted Toro lonesome Jam session, and asked him to play a few chords while he sang over it (Gerard showed him the specific chords) and thus...Famous Last Words was born.
At this point mikey wasn't allowwed to sleep over at the mansion place (too depressed)but when he came over gerard played the song that he played that night with toro (Which eventually became Famous Last Words). Playing that song really made mikey start feeeling better and the band as a whole....i think maybe that This is how i dissappear is about mikey a little bit (And Without you is how i dissappear/ and live my life alone) because maybe gerard feels if he loses his brother he woul in a way dissappear

Wow, oddly reading that made me very sad. But that actually sounds right. "This Is How I Dissappear" does sound like it could have been written about Mikey. It almost sounds like Gerard may think that Mikey's depression was his fault, maybe because he thinks he hurt Mikey in some way or maybe influenced him to think a certain way or something.(I;m just a ghost so I can't hurt you anymore.) Maybe he even almost wishes he could take Mikey's place so Mikey wouldn't have to go through something like that.

That aside, I have another interpretation too.
I believe the Patient already died and someone he was close to is now dying, most likely his lover. He's trying to say that she shouldn't worry about what he's done to deserve death, or something along those lines, and that unless she comes with him he's not going to be happy in the afterlife. She's worried about going to heaven, so she wants to ask where she'll go and the Patient can't tell her. The patient will do anything to get her to come with him. She doesn't believe he's really there with her, he keeps telling her he's just a ghost, wich he might be but I see him more as a vision than a ghost. And finally she just decides to go with him. I also get the feeling she did something very very bed to deserve what she's getting(death). I also have the feeling it had something to do with children.

But I'm probably just very wrong.

Now here is what i think:

In this song The Patient is not dead but rather see's himself as dead, i feel the song is about an internal sturggel between him being storng and brave about what hes going thru and him not and acting scared and afraid

its also about him being seperated from the person he loves by being sick
he feels that if hes sick he cant be with her (And without you is how I disappear,
And live my life alone forever now.)He also must have not treated her as he should have('m really not so with you any more.
I'm just a ghost, so I can't hurt you anymore,
So I can't hurt you anymore.)

and as he talks to his family he hopes they can tell how truly feels by the way he talks to them(Can you hear me cry out to you?
Words I thought I'd choke on figure out.)

but this is just my view

yeah i agree with you guys. it probably is about the patient trying to talk to his lover, but she's not listening since he's a ghost and he's crying to her to listen... thats what i think...

yes...his lover.

I actually believe that this is the Patient talking about himself to his dead lover. (If she dies instead of him)


"To unexplain the unforgivable,
Drain all the blood and give the kids a show.
By streetlight this dark night,
A seance down below.
There's things that I have done, you never,
Should ever know.'
-The seance could be being held by the Patient to get into contact with his lover and he doesn't want her to look at him from the afterlife and see things she 'should never know."

"And without you is how I disappear,
And live my life alone forever now.
And without you is how I disappear,
And live my life alone forever now.'
-The Patient here maybe is talking about how he will now be alone for the rest of his life and will just disapear as he lives on because he is nothign without her.

"Who walks among the famous living dead,
Drowns all the boys and girls inside your bed.
And if you could talk to me,
Tell me if it's so,
That all good girls go to heaven.
Well, heaven knows,'
-Again he is trying to contact his lover and he wants to know if she made it to heaven. Then saying only heaven knows

"Can you hear me cry out to you?
Words I thought I'd choke on figure out.
I'm really not so with you any more.
I'm just a ghost, so I can't hurt you anymore,
So I can't hurt you anymore."
-Again he is crying out to his lover and trying to contact her. He'd thought he'd choke on the words he's been saying to her but its not like that anymore. And with the theme that he will disappear he is now a ghost she his inner pain will hurt no more.

"And now
You wanna see how far down I can sink?
Let me out!
So you can
Well now so you can
I'm so far away from you
Well now so you can"
-He is sinking even further with depression and he feels so far away from her now after her death.

"And without you is how I disappear,
And without you is how I disappear,
Forever
Forever now'
-He is restating that without her he is nothing.

I loved one is dead/dying and this is how gerard feels
all the words mean something but i dont want to explain it all

I think this song is about the Patient realizing he is going to be separated from his love. Great song too.

i think it's just about the Patient disappearing into the after-life

i think this song is about the patient thinking about all of his loved ones and his past and thinking about his death and how the loved ones will deal...but under that i think its personal (from the band)

P.S. awesome song....my favorite on this album

i think this song has loads of meanings
i first thought it was about household violence mainly due to the lines
I'm just a ghost,
So I can't hurt you anymore
when i listened to it again it seemed to sum up exactly how you feel when someone you are close to leaves (dies or moves away) when someone close to you leaves you feel as if part of you has gone with them and unless you grab the remaining part of yourself you feel like you are living in a dream-world with only part of yourself
btw i thought of this when my baby cousin (who i am extremely close to) was away for 3 weeks
i agree with everyone above about mikey and gerard as when mikey was making up his mind as to where his life was going, gerard must have missed him like crazy as they are so close.
when someone goes you always want to just scream stay but you often fake it and say don't worry i'll be fine even when you know you are going to be beaten up inside
i think the line
Can you hear me cry out to you?
Words I thought I'd choke on figure out
when you tell someone you'll be fine you always think its going to be really hard but then it tends to be really easy this also agrees with the first line GO!
the ending reminded me of after someone goes you often get really cross and scream hence
And now, you wanna see how far down I can sink?
Let me go, fuck!

just saying i now realise this makes no sense

I think it's the patient realising he is alone and that he now thinks he's nothing.

i lvoe this song and it has alot of meaning... ♥♥♥

Call me crazy, but this song reminds me of Marilyn Manson (Dun, Dun ,Dun!)

For one, I havnt heard of MM in a while so he's 'dissapearing'.

And for another, 'drain all the blood...' sounds like the time he cut himself onstage and had to go to the hospital.

'Walks among the famos living dead' is refering to all the oter unheard-of-for-a-while rockers he now 'walks amungst'

'I'm just a gohst, I cant hurt you antmore refurs to him constantly being sued for messing with kids minds and how he's still getting blamed for all that.

Now, dont take that the wrong way, I highly doubt this song is about MM, but the 'dead rocker' thing is an idea

Seven_illusions:

When I first heard this song, before I read the lyrics, It reminded me of vampires...
Lol, I have a habit of imagining a video for almost every song I like xD!...

hahaha. i imagine a video for every song i like too! XD.

yeah i heard gerard saying he wrote it about the spooky encounters they came across while recording the album...but the patient thing sounds true...i like. haha.

This song may have to do with, I don't know, Patient realizing that not only is he dying, but is scared that his memory might fade away along with his spirit? Again, dark times...

*Sakura-chan*

well... the whole "disappear" thing kinda reminded me of the part in catcher in the rye when holden is talking about how he was walking on the sidewalk and thought he would disappear and he kept thinking "allie, don't let me disappear"

y'know? i mean it's kinda strange that i should think of it... but still.

Gerard did say that Catcher was his favorite book, so it is possible he could get song ideas or lyrics from it.

My fave book too.