| Author | Message |
|---|
sad savior;
Wild Eyed Joker
Age: 28
Gender: Female
Posts: 86309 | August 20th, 2014 at 12:38am
i really want to be in the big brother house. but part of me knows i would become absolutely miserable and probably self evict due to a panic attack or something.
but man i want to do that so badly |
Richey Edwards.
Demolition Lover
Age: 31
Gender: Female
Posts: 16507 | August 20th, 2014 at 08:33am I just really want to write a novel. I don't want to be stuck in food service forever. I have nothing to write about though. Even if I did, nobody would read it. I don't know what career I want, and I dont have the money for community college to further any skills (or lack there of) I have. I hope I figure something out soon. I just spent so much money on shoes I needed, and now I might have to buy a new phone. I know it doesn't seem like much, but I just barely make 20 hours a week, on a good week where I don't leave early. Which hasn't been lately. And they're thinking of cutting my hours even more. I'm just so stuck in a rut that feels permanent. |
wednesday.
In the Cannibal Glow
Age: -
Gender: Female
Posts: 53026 | August 20th, 2014 at 02:40pm i honestly don't remember the last time that i've been this nervous. over 300 people are depending on me, and i really don't want to mess this up. |
Richey Edwards.
Demolition Lover
Age: 31
Gender: Female
Posts: 16507 | August 20th, 2014 at 08:41pm You need to do one of two things:
1. Stop saying you dont "love me like that", and then acting like you do.
2. Admit that you do, if you really do. If you really dont, stop acting like you do.
I can't do it. You know exactly how I feel. you've known for years. I've never known where you stand, cause you say one thing and then do another. I just wanna know. Not that it would change anything, I'd just like to hear you say what we both know to be truth. |
Frnk iero.
Awake and Unafraid
Age: 30
Gender: Female
Posts: 11747 | August 21st, 2014 at 04:25pm I burned myself on purpose, on Saturday.
I haven't self-harmed in over a year.
It was over Kayla.
I'm pretty much over her, but sometimes I panic, still.
I'm worried about myself.
|
Richey Edwards.
Demolition Lover
Age: 31
Gender: Female
Posts: 16507 | August 23rd, 2014 at 02:17pm hesitant alien.:
I'm worried about myself.
|
stereo typical.
Tragic With a Capital T
Age: -
Gender: Female
Posts: 46847 | August 24th, 2014 at 08:41am My appetite's messed up again and that worries me
it usually only fluctuates when I'm extremely stressed or in really poor health |
Richey Edwards.
Demolition Lover
Age: 31
Gender: Female
Posts: 16507 | August 24th, 2014 at 08:55am I'm really getting annoyed with myself. I just need to stop. My emotions need a slap across the face.
also
You're really creepy. Stop hitting on all the girls at work, including me. I caught you staring at me quite a lot, and J as well. It's not welcomed. Thank you kindly. |
ab aeterno.
Lost My Fear of Falling
Age: 30
Gender: Female
Posts: 93820 | August 24th, 2014 at 05:48pm they weren't there for me and i will never forgive them for that... is that fair of me though? i don't know...
i skipped out on a baby shower i was supposed to go to today. i don't feel bad about it.
i mean come on it's a baby shower the baby isn't even present... but my dad wanted me go.
i really don't get why he's trying to include me in his life now? i mean yeah i get it he wants to make up for the shit during my childhood, but...
i've already moved on??????? grew up!!!!!?? i don't blame him for it or anything
because both my parents royally screwed me up
god that makes me sound like a shit person but i basically raised myself (jk my grandma did but she passed away three years ago)
don't waste your time on me now especially when you've got another kid coming
delilah could probably use your attention way more than i do? i grew up okay, but she's still a teenager.
i'm gonna be twenty years older than this kid... |
stereo typical.
Tragic With a Capital T
Age: -
Gender: Female
Posts: 46847 | August 25th, 2014 at 07:29am My yearly timetable is as bad as my half yearlies.
I don't know how to handle this. |
wednesday.
In the Cannibal Glow
Age: -
Gender: Female
Posts: 53026 | August 25th, 2014 at 12:51pm i'm surprised that i've been calm and under control over the past few weeks. losing the house doesn't even seem to upset me anymore. but watching my parents go through this horrible thing upsets me. my father designed that house. it was 100% built just like they wanted it to be, and now the asshole next door will get it for less than what it is worth and he'll end up demolishing most of it and rebuilding it in a different way. there are so many memories tied to that house, both good and bad. i lost pieces of my childhood when we lost that house. i didn't even give a shit as i threw away my old trophies and toys from my childhood. but seeing my mom break down and cry several times each day just kills me. i wish that i could do something for them, but i can't. it's too late. life is such a bitch. |
Frnk iero.
Awake and Unafraid
Age: 30
Gender: Female
Posts: 11747 | August 25th, 2014 at 02:27pm The witch was right.
|
DeWitt.
Crash Queen
Age: 31
Gender: -
Posts: 31119 | August 26th, 2014 at 07:15pm I don't know what I'm afraid of anymore. |
Richey Edwards.
Demolition Lover
Age: 31
Gender: Female
Posts: 16507 | August 27th, 2014 at 08:58am I'm not a very good "me". That's why I wanna be like you. Or at least very similar to you. You do so many cool things and have so many awesome talents. I wanna be like that. I wanna have cool hobbies and be super smart and do really cool, fun stuff. I'm really boring. I can't really do anything. All I can do is barely scrape by with my survival jobs. One of which isn't even guaranteed to last. I just wanna be like you. |
stannis baratheon.
Salute You in Your Grave
Age: -
Gender: -
Posts: 2422 | August 29th, 2014 at 06:03pm i'm honestly baffled at the fact that this site still exits, but --
like, my profile is a message from my 18 year old self and everything about my old posts is so horribly awkward, but i'm at least a little bit proud of how i was seven years ago
this was my place to grow up and obsess over stuff and get angry and maybe that's a good thing |
wednesday.
In the Cannibal Glow
Age: -
Gender: Female
Posts: 53026 | August 30th, 2014 at 01:59am why do i even bother anymore? none of them give a shit about me. it is so obvious. i'm done. |
beaker;
Ghostbuster Famous
Age: -
Gender: -
Posts: 71107 | August 30th, 2014 at 07:53am I had to put my arm around him to keep myself from falling. I wonder if I was supposed to or if he expected I would have had more balance. He might not have even noticed.
but I was super aware that I had to put my arm around him, and it just reminded me how much I wish I had someone to put my arms around and who can put his arms around me |
wednesday.
In the Cannibal Glow
Age: -
Gender: Female
Posts: 53026 | August 30th, 2014 at 04:25pm there are so many things that have upset me and i can't take it anymore. i wish that i could just sit here and type them all out, but then i'd end up with a gigantic paragraph of bullshit. instead, i'll just sum my thoughts and feelings up into one sentence: i honestly and truly wish that i had never been born. |
Richey Edwards.
Demolition Lover
Age: 31
Gender: Female
Posts: 16507 | August 30th, 2014 at 09:39pm Why do I always have to feel like the bad guy? I can't seem to express my feelings properly to where people can get where I'm coming from. As a result, they end up feeling shitty. I've tried all different kinds of wording to make it simple. I've tried everything really. I just always seem to come out looking like the bad one. I don't try to do that. Things just never come out right I guess. I'm just tired of being the bad guy. Maybe I need to stop wearing my heart on my sleeve. I feel like I can't talk to anyone. |
Frnk iero.
Awake and Unafraid
Age: 30
Gender: Female
Posts: 11747 | August 31st, 2014 at 03:09pm I think I want to claim edge again.
I'm going to end up going down a very bad drug path if not.
|
