| Author | Message |
|---|
MyChemicalBlack
Salute You in Your Grave
Age: -
Gender: -
Posts: 2351 | August 17th, 2008 at 08:38pm
Man, I really need to fix this lazy habit!!
Look at the poetry I've missed! xD
Beautiful, well written, and I love the endings to both of the poems. ^_^
Well done, mon amie.  |
Frank Anthony Iero.
Bulletproof Heart
Age: 32
Gender: Female
Posts: 28347 | August 29th, 2008 at 11:47pm Thank-you Mr. MyChemicalBlack. X] |
Tilly and the Wall
Bleeding on the Floor
Age: 31
Gender: -
Posts: 1850 | September 1st, 2008 at 11:05am I was just stumbling around and decided to see if you'd posted anything xD
Saving Bella
Remember that time when I told you I don't like vampire poems/stories? Well, Britt, you have just stunned me here. I absolutely love this one, it's so perfect, written in your awesome style, it's just really nice.
It does have a twilight feel, but you did it just beautifully, like colouring a picture in with better colours. I just mean...wow 
Darkness Stains Light
First of all, lovely title. Anyway. I love the sort of...strangeness in this, the way it is so unique, with a lightly ghostly feel. Each line's a vivid image, and yet it's still flowing into the next. Can't pick a favorite part, because I like how you've written it overall, the general chemistry between the words and images is great xD
Looks Like Rain.
Again, beautiful and a rather...curious choice of words in the poem. I'd love for you to explain it all to me, because I like it so much I'd love to know it inside out :]
|
Frank Anthony Iero.
Bulletproof Heart
Age: 32
Gender: Female
Posts: 28347 | September 1st, 2008 at 05:23pm Thank-you Ms. Jane. 
"Looks Like Rain", has a few metaphors in it. I tried to hide what its about, but, I guess I'll tell. X]
Its about feeling alone and everything could be different if some things could change. Like when I wrote one side of the mountain is covered with snow, but the other side looks like rain.
Then the ending is about how without change, things would feel depressing, scary even.
Yep. X] |
Frank Anthony Iero.
Bulletproof Heart
Age: 32
Gender: Female
Posts: 28347 | September 1st, 2008 at 05:24pm Sweet Dreams.
Constructive stars within the galaxy.
Webs sprinkled by the rain to compliment the moon.
A dark ray between morning and night.
Guiding pathway from sea to land.
See the mystery revive.
A chill to sink into the bone.
A spark in reflecting eyes.
Could have been the timing.
Little lover boy’s heart beats,
Where’s your experience tonight?
The stars could fall.
Taste so bitterly sweet.
Thunder in the distance.
Lightning in view.
I’ll just sleep on light feathers tonight.
Lullabies to sing me to sleep.
Lovely as the stars in the sky. |
MyChemicalBlack
Salute You in Your Grave
Age: -
Gender: -
Posts: 2351 | September 1st, 2008 at 06:11pm A spark in reflecting eyes.
I love this line, but truth be told- I throughly enjoyed it all. xD
Beautiful imagery that actually puts you "there" (or just in your mind's eye).
Sry, I'm mumuring. *ahem* KICKASS POEM. ^_^
Execellent work, mon amie. |
Tilly and the Wall
Bleeding on the Floor
Age: 31
Gender: -
Posts: 1850 | September 2nd, 2008 at 12:55pm You're welcome
Sweet Dreams.Like MCB said, I love that line xD
It just speaks so much in so little, makes the poem so much more real and it feels like you're just standing there, right beside or looking at what you're describing.
While I was reading this I was actually listening to music [which I turn off while reading poetry xD] and it actually went well with it, I think it can be a song =] |
Frank Anthony Iero.
Bulletproof Heart
Age: 32
Gender: Female
Posts: 28347 | September 4th, 2008 at 06:11am XD Thank-you MyChemicalBlack.
Thank-you too, Ms. Jane. |
Frank Anthony Iero.
Bulletproof Heart
Age: 32
Gender: Female
Posts: 28347 | September 5th, 2008 at 06:19pm A Mystery.
Masked man to hollow out the mind.
Beautiful, little disaster coming back again.
At the center of the earth, they scream.
Rage war on the one’s that can not survive!
A cold demise to land in someone else’s dream.
Looking down at you; asking what you aim for?
The response remains unanswered.
Where’s the board to paint on?
A plan from the Mr. Maker to plead.
Extra time for the infant to grow.
Become a modeled man in society.
What society?
Where the leader rain upon the land.
Drowning the people waiting for their survival ship.
Its never coming back.
Nothing to believe in but a story.
A million miles worth of history.
Stepping stones to a mystery. |
MyChemicalBlack
Salute You in Your Grave
Age: -
Gender: -
Posts: 2351 | September 7th, 2008 at 03:24pm I love the first stanza, maybe it's my paranoia talking but it had a dash of rhyme?
Either way...'Twas awesome and I enjoyed it thoroughly. ^_^
Ah, and congrats on Poet of the Month-- you deserved it. |
Frank Anthony Iero.
Bulletproof Heart
Age: 32
Gender: Female
Posts: 28347 | September 7th, 2008 at 08:57pm Thank-you Mr. MyChemicalBlack.
I just noticed it rhymes too. o.o
XD |
Frank Anthony Iero.
Bulletproof Heart
Age: 32
Gender: Female
Posts: 28347 | September 7th, 2008 at 08:59pm Masked Reference.
Closed reference to the cast of labor.
The implausible meaning to the skim of thought.
Towards the detour of great halls of yore.
A miserable mistake to sing a happy tune.
To be burned by the stake for a crime you didn’t do.
Rest the weary head of shame.
A colliding message to sound.
The terrible sight to bestow.
Where shall you lie tonight?
Upon the harsh gravel to sleep;
Below the surface for a scream.
For the hand you dealt from request.
The crime of the young’s blood burns.
And the dreams that were ended.
To the masked hero to fall.
A cry for help!
And the bells chimed in victory.
Flames set off towards the sky.
Justice to the abandoned family.
To weep one less tonight.
---
Can you guys edit your first post? I can't and its getting on my nerves. =/
XD |
MyChemicalBlack
Salute You in Your Grave
Age: -
Gender: -
Posts: 2351 | September 8th, 2008 at 10:12am To the masked hero to fall.
A cry for help!
I loved this line. ^_^
Though, the second stanza appealed to me the most.
Hell, I loved it all. xD
Hm, yeah, I noticed that awhile ago.
Not sure why they did it, but as long as I can change the underscore under my poetry thread...I am content.  |
Frank Anthony Iero.
Bulletproof Heart
Age: 32
Gender: Female
Posts: 28347 | September 10th, 2008 at 06:41am Thank-you Mr. MyChemicalBlack. X]
ah, they need to fix it. =/
X] |
Frank Anthony Iero.
Bulletproof Heart
Age: 32
Gender: Female
Posts: 28347 | September 20th, 2008 at 12:48am The Cure.
Decode the mind and leave it to rot.
Though it shines and refreshes life.
To define a moment to hold on to.
A significant measure to be.
The unseen hill top to tower over.
Through the hope to conspire.
And to fall could stop the heart.
I could be the cure.
Bringing the mind to peace in thought.
A alert to tear the blinded eyes.
Cause soft waters to rise in horror.
Destroying the true being of one.
Wildflowers to make a mockery of you.
I could be the cure.
Of the clouds to never shade to gray.
Being the haze of rainfall for plenty.
Bringing the sun to grow and the moon to sleep.
I could be the cure.
Just have to say, “I love you too”…
I’ll be your cure. |
MyChemicalBlack
Salute You in Your Grave
Age: -
Gender: -
Posts: 2351 | September 20th, 2008 at 02:13pm Just have to say, “I love you too”…
I’ll be your cure
Ah, you really know how to end a poem. 
It was beautifully written, mon amie.
Once again, it was kickass! xD |
Frank Anthony Iero.
Bulletproof Heart
Age: 32
Gender: Female
Posts: 28347 | September 24th, 2008 at 08:03pm Thank-you, Mr. MyChemicalBlack. |
Tilly and the Wall
Bleeding on the Floor
Age: 31
Gender: -
Posts: 1850 | September 25th, 2008 at 09:20pm A Mystery
A million miles worth of history.
Stepping stones to a mystery.
Pure brilliance on your part. Absolutely wonderful, I love your take on the theme.
Masked Reference. Hmmm, this one kinda lost me in the middle, but the ending was great. I'm just going 0.0
xD
I love the way the second and third stanza are connected; it kinda holds the poem together. A little different from your style, which is why I like the fact that you've taken a risk there.
The Cure. Ah, I like the slight rhythm in this one. Another thing I liked here was the tone; it's very calm and soothing in contrast to some of the images. It creates a great atmosphere.
I've noticed you're wandering a little bit towards new themes, experimenting. I love that :] |
Frank Anthony Iero.
Bulletproof Heart
Age: 32
Gender: Female
Posts: 28347 | September 27th, 2008 at 12:36am Thank-you, Ms. Jane. |
Frank Anthony Iero.
Bulletproof Heart
Age: 32
Gender: Female
Posts: 28347 | October 4th, 2008 at 01:21am Blurred Reflection.
Imprisonment of the pulse locked in veins.
A sore sight beyond measures of being one.
The beating echo to follow the dream.
To fall in love and feel death for a while.
It could be the last flight to see her.
In all her last breaths sinking her deeper,
Into separate corners of a pale, blue room.
To match the sky that’s long gone out of view.
Living the lie that corrupts the minds of citizens.
The ability to shed the tears that were left to hide.
In cost of appearance in the reflecting frame,
That stands against the pale, blue wall.
With leaks from the ceiling that will drown us all.
Filling up to the top; blurring the reflection,
I see of me.
A person I wasn’t before! |
