School Legends

Oh, I forgot: Fairy Knickers.

This guy is pretty much the sole reason I believe intellectually disabled kids should be in special school where they are around people like them, not dumped into the middle of a regular school where, as we all know, kids are too cruel for their own good.

There was this guy a year above me, who was severely autistic. I'm pretty sure he had a few other behavioural problems, as he was aggressive, violent, and you basically couldn't look at him sideways without him pulling a knife on you (and, funnily enough, if any other kid had a knife at school, they were expelled on the spot - this kid would get a gentle 'talking to' by his favourite teacher, and they wouldn't even take the weapon off him).
Anyway, the guaranteed way to set him off was to call him 'Fairy Knickers'. I'm not sure of the story behind that, but I heard it was something about him getting dacked and he was wearing girl's underwear, with pictures of fairies on them.

All you had to do was say, 'Fairy Knickers' as he walked past, and he would literally chase you from one end of the school to the other, breathing heavily and groaning and stomping his feet like he was a bull about to charge. If he caught you, God help you - you'd get it like you'd never been beaten before.
One of my friends had never seen him in action, and didn't believe the story, so we told him to just say 'Fairy Knickers' next time he saw this kid.
Sure enough, he was chased all the way to the other end of the school before he ran out of puff and took an ass-kicking. And was then promptly suspended for 'provoking' the other student.

Following on with another cautionary tale of why autistic/disabled kids should not be in mainstream schools, is Ant Boy.
This kid... wow. He was your typical 'rocking and drooling' kind of autistic. His triggers were ants, snakes and farts. Kids used to tell him there were snakes coming to get him, and he'd insist that his mother told him snakes weren't real, they didn't exist. He used to pick ants up off the pathways and eat them, hence the nickname Ant Boy, and if you made a fart noise within his earshot, he'd burst into tears and do the whole rocking back and forth and moaning thing.


And, then there was Terri, who got pregnant in year 11. The social committee was always around the school taking photos for the yearbook, and somehow a picture of a heavily pregnant Terri at her last school disco before dropping out made it into the yearbook.
The principal had an absolute shit-fit, screaming at the social committee about how parents would be appalled at the image that photo would present to other students, families and the community.
Pfft. It's a pregnant 16-year-old. Happens all the time around here. Her being pregnant was not a big deal at all, just the fact that a photo of her with a huge belly, dancing with her friends at a school disco, was in the yearbook for posterity.

^ I've got a similar story: Last year the entire musical cast got to have a lunch togehter with the usual 5th hour lunch. With in 5min we had started playing theatre games and by the end of the class, we had the entire lunch room involved. The kids had no idea what hit them and it was one of the coolest lunches I had ever been apart of.

Apparently 5 or so years back, in the middle of the Advanced Theatre Show, a senior who was standing behind a counter, took off his belt and was completly naked from the waste down. The audience knew nothing of it, but crew got a very nice side view of "everything" lol. I think it was all apart of a bet.

A few years ago, a student in my school got drunk and drove his car into a river.

And there was a group of juniors that made a habit of stealing cars, rolling them down hills, and jumping out right before the cars drove out onto a major highway at the bottom. Eight kids died in that class in one year.

OMG. Mr Garrison.

Not his real name, obvs. He's actually Mr Grayson, but we always called him 'Garrison' behind his back after the South Park character.

Now, I give him credit for trying to be cool and attempting to get along with his students, but he steps waaaayyyy over the line into doofus territory.

On free-dress days, he shows up in full school uniform - knee socks, tie, and short shorts. Ugh.

He always walks past groups of students at lunchtime and goes, 'Wassup brus?'... like, in all seriousness.
It's hilarious.

And a friend of mine who went to a different school, transferred in year 10. On his first day, he didn't have uniforms yet, so he just came in jeans (which everyone wears anyway cuz our uniform is 'navy pants') and a yellow hoodie... Grayson saw us talking and came up to say hi, my friend had already been warned about Grayson so he's like, 'Oh hey, Mr Gayson'... Mr Grayson's smile just dropped and he was like, 'It's GRAYson' and then walked away.... my friend and I stood there just laughing our asses off, it was soooo funny.

Bitchin' Bryar:

Oh, and.
Courtney Love went to my school for about a year. It was aeons ago, and only three teachers can remember her, but it was The Courtney Love.
Someone scratched 'Courtney Harrison' into the wall of my Social Studies classroom, and some people think it was her, but I truley doubt it.

Apparently it was. Check this out.

It's not quite legendary yet, but it's still pretty famous:

Mr Toll is a PE teacher, and he had to take the Sports Studies students sailing, and because there are so many of them, they were allowed to take the brand new minibus. So they all pile into the brand new minibus, and they get there, go rowing, and then head back. Unfortunately, the bus ran low on fuel, so they stopped at a gas station where, Mr Toll proceeded to fill the brand new mini bus with four star, when everyone knows that mini buses are diesel.

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this didn't happen at my school, but as a Leaver's Prank at my mate's brother's school, they found two pigs, and sprayed one with a number one, and one with a number three, and set them loose in the school, and the teachers spent all day looking for Pig Two.

Ashley, a kid in my math class, got school famous for having an attendance record of 87%, and not getting kicked out. (You usually get expelled if it falls under 94%)

And all the little 6th graders think that Ms Carter (my latin teacher) has no feet. Not quite sure how they believe it though, she quite clearly has feet...

Ooooh. We've had a few.

My Year 8 Science teacher was LEGENDARY. He was only there for a year but he was the best teacher the school's ever had. He just let us do whatever, and he just gossiped with us all. I can remember one double lesson where we all just sat around, ate cake [he brought it in for us. Told you he was awesome] and talked about Jeremy Clarkson for two hours. And when he left, we dressed him up in pink fairy wings, a sparkly pink cowboy hat and gave him a pink wand. He wore them all day.

Umm. My friend fainted in Science one year and I had to catch her and fell over myself.

Our school plays are always a mess. We normally put them together in about seven or eight weeks and they're just a nightmare. Nothing goes right, no-one knows their lines, but we just have our own little raves backstage. And normally everyone's drunk [well, the Y9s and 10s.] on the last night.

Our Math teacher is insane; he just throws things. Chairs, books, whatever he feels like. He also gave us a lecture on underage drinking once and just told us not to get caught.

And our teachers dress up and perorm a song for us once a year. They did 'Gay Bar' by Electric Six last year. Very odd.

Stupid Computer!