Suicide and Self harm

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blow Bleeding on the Floor Age: - Gender: Female Posts: 1137	July 16th, 2008 at 06:17am ChipmunkOnKetamine: Some people spend all day helping others, and trying to make other people's lives better, and when they go home, they have their own problems, and all they want to do is to be able to solve their own problems the way the help other people, but it doesn't work. They realize that what they are telling people is empty, and doesn't help, and they need to do something about that. If they grew up in a family that believes that if you do something wrong, you should be punished, then they are likely to hurt themselves as a form of punishment, for not being able to help anyone. You can't then turn around and say that they are being selfish. They are punishing themselves because they could save everyone. I know that not everyone that self-mutilates does it for that reason, but some people do, and to say that people who self-harm are selfish is a little rich, because most people do things soley for themselves a lot of the time. Yes, it is selfish, but if you are spending the rest of your time doing things for other people, then surely you are entitled to a little bit of self-indulgence, however you get it. It is still selfish. I can hardly imagine that a person's only act of selfishness would be harming oneself. Humans, by nature, are much more selfish than that. And that really is beside the point, because if you self-harm you need help. It's a completely wrong and unhealthy way to deal with things.
Mindfuck Always Born a Crime Age: - Gender: Female Posts: 5614	July 16th, 2008 at 06:55am ChipmunkOnKetamine: Yes, it is selfish, but if you are spending the rest of your time doing things for other people, then surely you are entitled to a little bit of self-indulgence, however you get it. I can't think of many people who would choose to do good deeds for everyone all the time and then go home and slash their wrists to pieces, do you? And if your reasoning behind cutting is "self-indulgence", then that just reinforces my negative outlook on it. I can't think of a more pathetic reason to cut, to be honest.
xDarkenxUrxClothesx Fabulous Killjoy Age: 30 Gender: Female Posts: 161	July 16th, 2008 at 10:47pm I agree, cutting isn't a self-indulgence, it's a sickness. It's a mindset, a disorder. You'd need help for it to recover, just like any other sickness.
blow Bleeding on the Floor Age: - Gender: Female Posts: 1137	July 16th, 2008 at 11:51pm xDarkenxUrxClothesx: I agree, cutting isn't a self-indulgence, it's a sickness. It's a mindset, a disorder. You'd need help for it to recover, just like any other sickness. Cutting or any form of self-harm is not a disorder, it may be a symptom of one but it is not the disorder/illness itself. It is self-indulgent. It is extremely unhealthy and done purely because it makes one feel good for a short amount of time. If someone would rather hurt themselves, take the easier path, than traveling the harder road of getting help then they are selfish and self-indulging.
hilaryMCR Killjoy Age: 32 Gender: Female Posts: 58	July 17th, 2008 at 12:52am Faye Merci: hilaryMCR: i dk..like for me i don't see it as dangerous because i'm not going to cut deep enough to do damage i can control it..i never go deeper than i mean too so i guess i don't see it as dangerous but maybe it is for other people..thats just me.. Call me a bitch but I'm pretty sure the first post says this thread isn't a confession thread; meaning while me may feel sorry for you, your own personal experience is not pertinent, unless it's used as an example rather than a plea. i wasn't trying to confess anything..i was just trying to use my own experience with self harm to state my opinion i wasn't looking for any sympathy..sorry if i offended you or anyone else..i just can't really say that that is how it is for everyone i'm just saying thats how it is for me..
blow Bleeding on the Floor Age: - Gender: Female Posts: 1137	July 17th, 2008 at 01:16am It's all right, this just isn't the place for that. You can talk about it in another forum. (Personal Questions maybe?) You can state your opinion with out saying your specific experience.
IceHog69 Bulletproof Heart Age: 31 Gender: - Posts: 25232	July 17th, 2008 at 04:03am Mindfuck: ChipmunkOnKetamine: Yes, it is selfish, but if you are spending the rest of your time doing things for other people, then surely you are entitled to a little bit of self-indulgence, however you get it. I can't think of many people who would choose to do good deeds for everyone all the time and then go home and slash their wrists to pieces, do you? no, but I can think of one, and to say that she is selfish, sort of hurts, because I've seen her life fall apart around her, whilst she hold s up other people's, including mine. Mindfuck: And if your reasoning behind cutting is "self-indulgence", then that just reinforces my negative outlook on it. I can't think of a more pathetic reason to cut, to be honest. I was just usuing self-indelgence because that was what someone else had said it was, more often in that case it is a punishment. Everybody is selfish, for the majority of the time. When you get up in the morning, and have a shower, you don't think about the water being wasted, that could go and solve a drought in Africa, you don't think about the energy used to heat the water contributing to global warming, and killing the planet for our children, you ust think, I need a shower. Everyone is selfish.
blow Bleeding on the Floor Age: - Gender: Female Posts: 1137	July 17th, 2008 at 05:37am ChipmunkOnKetamine: no, but I can think of one, and to say that she is selfish, sort of hurts, because I've seen her life fall apart around her, whilst she hold s up other people's, including mine. If someone was not adept at holding together their own life, I can't imagine that they would be able to help with other's Not to be mean, it's sad and I am sympathetic. I hope you've tried to get her professional help. Quote I was just usuing self-indelgence because that was what someone else had said it was, more often in that case it is a punishment. Everybody is selfish, for the majority of the time. When you get up in the morning, and have a shower, you don't think about the water being wasted, that could go and solve a drought in Africa, you don't think about the energy used to heat the water contributing to global warming, and killing the planet for our children, you ust think, I need a shower. Everyone is selfish. I know that it is sometimes a 'punishment', but it is a self indulgent way to punish yourself. Water in your own community, could not help in Africa, that is a ridiculous statement. Also, cleanliness is a necessity. When you shower you're washing off micro-organisms that could make you very sick if they entered your body. Yes of course everyone is selfish, that's how, not just humans, but all forms of life survive.
IceHog69 Bulletproof Heart Age: 31 Gender: - Posts: 25232	July 17th, 2008 at 07:21am Eponine: Water in your own community, could not help in Africa, that is a ridiculous statement. . It's just an example.
blow Bleeding on the Floor Age: - Gender: Female Posts: 1137	July 17th, 2008 at 07:26am ChipmunkOnKetamine: It's just an example. It's an inaccurate and incorrect example so it is irrelevant.
IceHog69 Bulletproof Heart Age: 31 Gender: - Posts: 25232	July 17th, 2008 at 08:23am no, it's not inaccurate and incorrect. The energy used heating and pumping water does contribute to global warming, or at least in most households it does. When you shower, you contribute to global warming. You can easily use sanitizer to clean your hands, and only shower once every other day, but people like to wash every day. /tangent
blow Bleeding on the Floor Age: - Gender: Female Posts: 1137	July 17th, 2008 at 08:33am I was referring to the Africa example. And personally, I need to shower everyday.
Radio Saturday Salute You in Your Grave Age: 34 Gender: Female Posts: 3513	July 17th, 2008 at 11:04am Eponine: If someone was not adept at holding together their own life, I can't imagine that they would be able to help with other's Not to be mean, it's sad and I am sympathetic. I hope you've tried to get her professional help. I don't know... I'm very good at giving advice and being supportive to friends and family when they're down, and I have a history of self-harm. A lot of times, it's easier to solve other people's problems than your own, and a piece of good advice doesn't become a piece of bad advice just because the person giving it can't get themselves together. (I'm not trying to rag on you or anything. I'm just saying.)
blow Bleeding on the Floor Age: - Gender: Female Posts: 1137	July 17th, 2008 at 02:28pm Hmm. Well, everyone is different. My own experience with self-harming and others who do it, is that they never where very concerned with others, or if they where they didn't give any good advice, but again everyone is different,
hilaryMCR Killjoy Age: 32 Gender: Female Posts: 58	July 18th, 2008 at 04:08pm Eponine: Hmm. Well, everyone is different. My own experience with self-harming and others who do it, is that they never where very concerned with others, or if they where they didn't give any good advice, but again everyone is different, i really don't agree with that..it actually kind of upset me..my best friend trusts my advice more than anyone (she's told me this) and (NOT trying to confess anything so don't yell at me) and i self-harm. I love my friends more than anything in the world and i think that "that they never where very concerned with others" is a very ignorant statement to make..but you said everyone is different..so i guess that makes it better..
thank fsm. In The Murder Scene Age: 36 Gender: Female Posts: 20564	July 18th, 2008 at 07:04pm ChipmunkOnKetamine: Some people spend all day helping others, and trying to make other people's lives better, and when they go home, they have their own problems, and all they want to do is to be able to solve their own problems the way the help other people, but it doesn't work. 1. It is still a selfish ACT. the act itself is done without any regard to others who might by hurt by it. 2. Everyone else: doing one selfish thing does not make you a totally selfish person. I hardly think there's anyone here who hasn't done something selfish, and I also highly doubt you'd call every person here a selfish person. It is a selfish ACT, but you really know nothing else about the person or their lives. Let's not generalize; that's half the problem with this mess in the first place.
thank fsm. In The Murder Scene Age: 36 Gender: Female Posts: 20564	July 18th, 2008 at 07:07pm Eponine: If someone was not adept at holding together their own life, I can't imagine that they would be able to help with other's Not to be mean, it's sad and I am sympathetic. I hope you've tried to get her professional help. Try and look at it from the viewpoint that things are often easier to solve when looked at from an objective point of view; therefore, your own issues may be much tougher for you (your mind, your brain, your personal chemical and emotional makeup) to solve than, say, a friend's or a coworker's. This may not be true for your mom or your neighbor, but it may very well be true for you. Make sense? =/ For example, I like to help people (god I didn't want to use myself here), but my own issues, like my procrastination, my unhealthy eating habits, and maybe a hypothetical fight with my best friend are isues too clouded by my own emotion to handle as they should be handled. That used to be me; luckily it is not anymore.
Go fuck yourself Devil's Got Your Number Age: 30 Gender: Female Posts: 37823	July 18th, 2008 at 07:39pm ChipmunkOnKetamine: Mindfuck: And if your reasoning behind cutting is "self-indulgence", then that just reinforces my negative outlook on it. I can't think of a more pathetic reason to cut, to be honest. I was just usuing self-indelgence because that was what someone else had said it was, more often in that case it is a punishment. Everybody is selfish, for the majority of the time. When you get up in the morning, and have a shower, you don't think about the water being wasted, that could go and solve a drought in Africa, you don't think about the energy used to heat the water contributing to global warming, and killing the planet for our children, you ust think, I need a shower. Everyone is selfish. selfish and needs aren't the same thing though. It's selfish to make someone else wait hours to use the only bathroom in the house while youstay in there just to mess with your hair and look at yourself in the mirror, It's a need to use the bathroom or else it you could have severe health problems from keeping waste in. People say they need to cut, I've said that, there is no need, there's a want someone else said this, you want to feel better instead of just having to deal with all your problems, I admit it is nice to take the edge off of pain, but there is better alternatives for many people, it's music, others art, others helping people. It isn't selfish as others would think, if your quite about it and not let anyone know, how would that be selfish? thats just suffering in silence
blow Bleeding on the Floor Age: - Gender: Female Posts: 1137	July 18th, 2008 at 09:20pm Chris Martin: Try and look at it from the viewpoint that things are often easier to solve when looked at from an objective point of view; therefore, your own issues may be much tougher for you (your mind, your brain, your personal chemical and emotional makeup) to solve than, say, a friend's or a coworker's. This may not be true for your mom or your neighbor, but it may very well be true for you. Make sense? =/ For example, I like to help people (god I didn't want to use myself here), but my own issues, like my procrastination, my unhealthy eating habits, and maybe a hypothetical fight with my best friend are isues too clouded by my own emotion to handle as they should be handled. That used to be me; luckily it is not anymore. I understand what you're saying. In my own experience that hasn't been the case, but everyone is different. So my statement was pretty much wrong. Although it may be easier to help other people with their problems, I don't think they would devote every single second of the day doing that. I may be wrong though. My Dear Delirious: It isn't selfish as others would think, if your quite about it and not let anyone know, how would that be selfish? thats just suffering in silence selfish: adjective (of a person, action, or motive) lacking consideration for others; concerned chiefly with one's own personal profit or pleasure You've stated that 'cutting' (all self-harming) is something you want to do. That would make it selfish. You are doing it because you want to. It doesn't matter if people know or not. (Though it is unlikely that you would be able to hide it forever, people would find out, one way or another.)
Mindfuck Always Born a Crime Age: - Gender: Female Posts: 5614	July 18th, 2008 at 10:24pm Radio Saturday: I don't know... I'm very good at giving advice and being supportive to friends and family when they're down, and I have a history of self-harm. A lot of times, it's easier to solve other people's problems than your own, and a piece of good advice doesn't become a piece of bad advice just because the person giving it can't get themselves together. While I realise it may be easier to solve other people's problems rather than your own, it doesn't mean I would personally want someone who self-harms to give me advice about my life. From my point of view, I would think, why should I listen to them when they are an emotional wreck? If I want advice I go to someone who I know takes their own life seriously.

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