Suicide and Self harm
| Author | Message |
|---|---|
| Go fuck yourself Devil's Got Your Number  Age: 30 Gender: Female Posts: 37823 | Eponine:it doesn't neccesarily have to be an indulgance, fo rme it wasn't, it was an addiction that controled every ounce of me. I needed it for a log time, or I thought I did. I honestly think there is a difference between indulgences and addictions, masterbating, sex, chocolate those can be indulgances. cigerettes, pot, crack, pian, those can be addictions, and I don't know anyone who wants an addiction. they do it once out of pure curiousity and get hooked. I don't see how you can have an indulgance that you obsess over and care for so much like you do with an addiction. with Indulgances you can lose it or have it taken away and be upset but it wouldn't kill yo and you'd still be ok. You lose an addiction and you crash, you crash hard. |
| Faye Merci Salute You in Your Grave  Age: - Gender: - Posts: 4473 | Is the word we're all searching for here indulgence? or indulgance, which i have yet to see in the dictionary. sorry, but it's bugging the shit out of me. |
| Mindfuck Always Born a Crime  Age: - Gender: Female Posts: 5614 | My Dear Delirious: You can get addicted to your indulgences, and your indulgences can be addictions. So yes, they are different things, but they intertwine on some levels. Sex can be an addiction (it's actually got a name: sex addiction  ), and chocolate can also be an addiction. It can be part of a food addiction; an eating disorder. Cigarettes are an addiction for most who smoke them, but it is also an indulgence for most people. Smokers I know look forward to having an indulgent little smoke on breaks / during lunch / at the end of the day etc. Therefore, I believe that cutting is one of those things that is an indulgence and an addiction. |
| conor oberst. Bleeding on the Floor  Age: 30 Gender: Male Posts: 1797 | a weird thing happened today, me and my friends rented a movie called Chumscrubber, it was about suicide. The friend i was with was a christian (like me) and her parents told us to take it back because they didn't want us watching something about suicide. and her mum said "theres a reason all the books about suicide were taken off the shelves at the school library" and that got me thinking, completly ignoring it's exsistance isn't going to prevent it. if anything it could encourage it, most books and movies about suicide show the after effects of suicide and how it effects everyone arround them... to me it sounds like i'm talking out of my ass, but i think it's stupid that these things are always off limits when having a normal everyday conversation and as teenagers we are made to stay away from anything form of media that could give us information about it. |
| blow Bleeding on the Floor  Age: - Gender: Female Posts: 1137 | My Dear Delirious: In that post I did not use the word indulgence. I said it was selfish. There is a difference between the two words. One being that selfish is and adjective while indulgence is a noun. I also believe that self harming is self-indulgent (another word, an adjective too, and different from indulgence) self-indulgent: adjective characterized by doing or tending to do exactly what one wants, esp. when this involves pleasure or idleness and again the definition of selfish. selfish: adjective (of a person, action, or motive) lacking consideration for others; concerned chiefly with one's own personal profit or pleasure The two different definitions are very similar (no the same, but very close) And addiction can start as an indulgence, you do something because you like it and it makes you feel good, and then over time it becomes a habit and then an addiction. All of the things you listed as 'indulgences' can be addictions, and all of the things that you listed as 'addictions' can be indulgences. I know many people who indulge in smoking pot but it is not an addiction for them. Oh and it's spelled indulgEnce. spitting venom.: Many parents and teachers may think that by allowing kids to access material on suicide that a kid might be more likely to commit suicide. It doesn't really make sense to me. Although recently I took a health course (high-school health) and it had a section of depression and suicide. Part of the problem is that parents/teachers may feel that books and movies sometimes romanticize suicide, and make it look like something cool. A lot of kids now a days do the same thing. I mean how many crappy ('emo') poems are there on the internet that talk about how awesome killing yourself is? |
| Sid Salute You in Your Grave  Age: 32 Gender: Female Posts: 2065 | Now, see, this is what I don't get. How is cutting selfish or indulgant? It's not like you're cutting other people is it? People do it to die, but people also do it to stay alive. For example, I know a girl who's recovered now but she cut to try and bleed to death because she was suicidal. That, I don't condone. But my best friend would do it because it was the only thing that would distract him long enough so he didn't kill himself. He didn't even realise he was hurting himself until I pointed out he always had bloody knuckles (he used to punch walls and stuff). To me, self harm is a very complicated issue and cannot be lumped under one catagory such as 'selfish' or 'indulgant' or even 'addictive'. It is a very individual and private thing and can only be judged by a professional. |
| blow Bleeding on the Floor Age: - Gender: Female Posts: 1137 | I already gave the definitions of selfish and self-indulgent. I really don't want to repeat them again. Whatever the reasoning behind self harming it is usually done to make yourself feel better even though it is not a healthy thing to do. If you continue to do it it is selfish and self indulgent. You do it because you want to and to some extent it gives you pleasure. That fits the definitions of selfish and self-indulgent. I am not lumping it in to a category. Selfish, self indulgent and addictive are not categories they are terms that describe self-harming. It's not that I don't feel bad for people who do this, or that I don't understand what it's like, I do, but that doesn't change what it is. The bottom line really is that anyone who self-harms needs help. If you self harm with the intent of dying that is suicide. Even if you fail, it's attempted suicide. |
| Mindfuck Always Born a Crime Age: - Gender: Female Posts: 5614 | Punk Russia: Why don't you read what other people have written before asking how people can see self harm as being selfish and indulgent? : Eponine: Punk Russia: I disagree. I don't think people do it to live. I see people who self harm as having little regard for their own life. Punk Russia: Food addiction is a personal and individual thing, but yet people are still quick to label people with it as being selfish and / or indulgent. It doesn't matter how individual and private the problem is, it can still be selfish and indulgent. And it isn't just lumped under one or more of those categories, it comes under quite a few. Selfish and indulgent are just a couple. |
| temptation. Shotgun Sinner  Age: 28 Gender: Female Posts: 8676 | I would never try to commit suicide or something like that,because I know that God gave me this life for a reason...yes,lots of things made me think about slitting my wrists but I never tried and I never will.I don't think dying is the way to solve your problems.Before you make that final step,you should think about how many people you're going to hurt. |
| mychemicalcoffee Joining The Black Parade  Age: 28 Gender: - Posts: 237 | i wouldn't cut myself to get rid of the pain or commit suicide to get out of life |
| hilaryMCR Killjoy  Age: 32 Gender: Female Posts: 58 | mychemicalcoffee: why do you feel that way? |
| bat1984 Bleeding on the Floor  Age: 39 Gender: Female Posts: 1885 | Sometimes it feels as if you can only control your body if you've little or no support around you self harm/ suicide seem to be your only option unfortunately many don't get help which is a great shame |
| UglyAsSin Jazz Hands  Age: 33 Gender: Female Posts: 283 | I posted in this thread quite a long time ago and every now and again i like to come in and read the viewpoints and things that era going on regarding this subject. I find the selfish-indulgent argument quite interesting. I can see how it could be interepreted as selfish as eponine has described. Although i think that is simplifying it too much. This is however only my opinion. Yes one does it for relief, to feel a little better. But it can also be to take ones mind off the issue. If it is such a big or seemingly unsolvable problem then one may resort to self harm as a way to cope with the seemingly unsolvable problem. A distraction in some ways. So yes perhaps it is selfish. I mean how many people like to admit or come to the realisation that something they are doing is selfish. To be honest its hard to explain and i think that someone can only truly understand this behaviour when one has experienced the thought processes and rationale behind coming to the decision or act of self harming just like mental disorders such as eating disorders, ocd and the such like. To someone who dos not understand or has not gone through an eatig disordee it would seem ridiculous and inconprehensible that someoene should starve themelves or not want to eat. People who have experienced self harming can try and explain as best as they can in order to help people understand why that particuar person does it. I do think it depends on the situation and the reasons why the person is turnig to this. People that self harm however become restricted. well some at least. wearing long sleeves all the time or covering everything up so that people cant see the scars. Not being able or wanting to go swimming and the such like. There is a huge amount of shame for people that self harm. i appreciate other peoples opinions and point of view but i also have my own points of view. hmm i dont know i that is a little rambly, sorry if it is. All the best x p.s bat 1984 i like that poem i your sig, very thought provoking! |
| blow Bleeding on the Floor Age: - Gender: Female Posts: 1137 | UglyAsSin: Selfish and self indulgent perfectly describe self harm. There are many other words that describe it, because it is many other things as well, but deep down, I believe that all self harming is selfish and self indulgent. Quote Taking your mind off the issue would be relief. It's distracting because, even though it hurts, it makes you temporarily feel good. The 'reasons' behind it all boil down to the same thing, the pleasure one gets from it. Quote I have experienced the thought process behind self harming, and I can tell you it's what I have said, selfish and self indulgent. Different people may resort to it for different 'reasons', but it is still selfish and self indulgent. Just because someone has not experienced it themselves does not mean they can't understand. I've never had an eating disorder, but I can understand that most stem from unhappiness with one's appearance and an extreme want to be skinny/better looking. You don't have to experience it to understand it, unless you're incredibly close minded. |
| UglyAsSin Jazz Hands Age: 33 Gender: Female Posts: 283 | now i remember why i dont like speaking my mind or giving my opinion in debates. I shouldnt have butted in. just forget my comment. |
| blow Bleeding on the Floor Age: - Gender: Female Posts: 1137 | UglyAsSin: It's fine to speak your opinion. Argue for you point, try and prove me wrong, that's kind of the point of debating. I'm not trying to attack you or anything. |
| Toybox Trash Killjoy  Age: 28 Gender: Female Posts: 42 | I hate suicide & self harm. I think they are both the most rediculous thing ever. Why escape from your life because you're unhappy. Gosh, get a life. Things do eventually look up. And cutting/starving/burning/hurting yourself annoys me. Just because someone makes you upset doesn't mean go take a freakin razor to your skin or a cigarette to your skin because that's just another cut to explain to your parents. If you're honestly so unhappy that you're harming yourself/thinking about suicide go get help. Don't freakin hurt yourself or kill yourself. Call suicide hotline if you have to. |
| Faye Merci Salute You in Your Grave Age: - Gender: - Posts: 4473 | Scars On Broadway:Easy for you to say. Until you've been as depressed as someone who wants to commit suicide, you really have no idea of the pain they're in. And going for help is a scary thing. Not only do you have to admit that you're hurting, but often help doesn't do what it's supposed to. My best friend admitted she had tried to kill herself and her therapist ended up putting her through the worst year of her life because she wouldn't listen to her. She assumed my best friend was just a coward. You're obviously very ignorant about how depressed some people can get. |
| Toybox Trash Killjoy Age: 28 Gender: Female Posts: 42 | Faye Merci: ohh no. i'm not ignorant about it. i know how bad it feels. i lost a very close friend from suicide a months ago and i felt very hopeless about everything but i tried my best to do other things than cut myself. i don't have anything against those who do. i think it's annoying to walk out in public and see a girl laughing with cuts all up her arm. i think it's annoying when someone goes, "khriss, i've been cutting myself lately and carving words into my arm," and knowing she's only doing it to look cool. it just upsets me to see people harming themselves and escaping from life won't solve any of your problems. |
| hilaryMCR Killjoy Age: 32 Gender: Female Posts: 58 | ^^ why do you thinkit's annoying to see someone laughing when she has "cuts all up her arm"? |
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