| Author | Message |
|---|
The Creature
In The Murder Scene
Age: -
Gender: -
Posts: 23462 | June 10th, 2009 at 06:04pm
Row row row your mom
Gently on the bed
Merrily merrily merrily
Now she's giving me head |
girl interrupted.
Salute You in Your Grave
Age: 29
Gender: Female
Posts: 2792 | June 13th, 2009 at 06:42am what d'you call two sheep tied to a lamp post in Cardiff?
-- a leisure centre.
 |
made from neon
Salute You in Your Grave
Age: 29
Gender: Female
Posts: 2036 | June 16th, 2009 at 12:01am bahahahaha! ^^
if you like children, leave right now. slough of baby jokes coming up. xD
how do you get ten babies in a bowl?
a blender.
and how do you get them out again?
tortilla chips!
what's gross?
a bin full of dead babies.
what's grosser?
the one at the bottom is still alive.
what's even grosser?
he has to eat his way to freedom.
and what's grossest?
he goes back for seconds.
what screams and crawls into walls?
a baby with forks in its eyes.
why did the baby fall off the swing?
he had no arms or legs.
why did the toddler drop her lollipop?
she was hit by a truck.
how do you stop a baby from choking?
take your dick out of its mouth.
i'm done; don't say you weren't warned. |
dee dee ramone.
Always Born a Crime
Age: 31
Gender: Female
Posts: 5369 | June 17th, 2009 at 04:43pm frank iero!:
major tom.:
i love the both of you deeply XD
[/creeper] |
dee dee ramone.
Always Born a Crime
Age: 31
Gender: Female
Posts: 5369 | June 17th, 2009 at 04:43pm frank iero!:
major tom.:
i love the both of you deeply XD
[/creeper] |
made from neon
Salute You in Your Grave
Age: 29
Gender: Female
Posts: 2036 | June 18th, 2009 at 05:59pm dee dee ramone.:
i love the both of you deeply XD
[/creeper]
 Shuuuucks. xD[/spam] |
IceHog69
Bulletproof Heart
Age: 31
Gender: -
Posts: 25232 | June 19th, 2009 at 09:52am Joke told to me by a Jewish friend, and not really sick, just moderatly off color:
Why do Jews have big noses?
because air is free. |
girl interrupted.
Salute You in Your Grave
Age: 29
Gender: Female
Posts: 2792 | June 22nd, 2009 at 11:27am dee dee ramone.:frank iero!:
i love the both of you deeply XD
[/creeper]
awh xDD
edit: so this isn't spam (:
probably been posted before and it's not that offensive but y'know.
"do you have kids? no? then you know nothing!"
"i know about contraception."
- ed byrne.  |
The Creature
In The Murder Scene
Age: -
Gender: -
Posts: 23462 | June 30th, 2009 at 01:39am Before I post, RIP MJ. Don't mean to offend you.
Micheal Jackson is now dead. Because he's 99% plastic, he's gonna be melted down and made into Lego's. Now little boys will be playing with him instead. |
doctor.
In The Murder Scene
Age: 30
Gender: Female
Posts: 23302 | June 30th, 2009 at 05:09am Michael Jackson's girlfriend is devestated; 'first my parents lose me in Portugal and now this?!' |
infinity guitars.
Awake and Unafraid
Age: 31
Gender: Female
Posts: 10838 | June 30th, 2009 at 08:53am when farrah fawcett died, she went to heaven and god told her he'd grant her one 'wish'
she said "ok then, i want all the children on earth to be safe and happy"
a few hours later, michael jackson died of a heart attack
sorry |
girl interrupted.
Salute You in Your Grave
Age: 29
Gender: Female
Posts: 2792 | July 12th, 2009 at 08:48am because as much as i love my country,
there's something so fucking funny about taking the mick out of it
how many welshmen does it take to change a lightbulb?
- none, its easier to sneak up on sheep in the dark.
did you here about that new free porn website they're going to launch just for welshmen?
- they're calling it Ewe Porn.
a welshman walks into a library and asks for a book on stereotypes.
- the librarian gives him a copy of shaun the sheep.
why don’t the welsh count sheep to fall asleep?
- because they want to sleep, not have a wet dream.
... there will be more. |
Spirit of Jazz.
Motor Baby
Age: 103
Gender: Female
Posts: 918 | July 12th, 2009 at 05:23pm LIGHTS!: Before I post, RIP MJ. Don't mean to offend you.
Micheal Jackson is now dead. Because he's 99% plastic, he's gonna be melted down and made into Lego's. Now little boys will be playing with him instead.
that made me cringe and cry from laughing at the same time. x]
this thread is the best.  it's good to know there's many many people with the same sick sense of humor like me. xD |
Go fuck yourself
Devil's Got Your Number
Age: 30
Gender: Female
Posts: 37823 | July 12th, 2009 at 08:03pm I have afew.
So this man meets this woman and they get to talking. The man really likes the girl and finds out she does sex stuff for money. So he asks "how much for a handjob?"
"250 dollars"
"whoa thats alot for a handjob" so she grabs him by the shirt and leads him to a window.
"see that movie theatre right there? I bought it with the money I made from giving handjobs, trust me, my handjobs are worth it."
so the guy pays her and got the best hand job of his life. He couldn't stop thinking about her, so he goes out and looks for her, finds her at a club and askes "how much for a bblowjob?"
"500 dollars"
"500 dollars for a blowjob?"
again she grabbed him and dragged him to a window "see that strip mall over there? I own it. I bought it from the money I made from blowjobs. So my blowjobs are well worth the price" finally he agrees and gives her 500 dollars. and in return recieved the best blowjob of his life.
Next day, he couldn't get her out of his mind, so he went out and searched for her.
"how much for pussy? a thousand?"
she once again grabbed him and dragged him to a window "see that huge condominium complex right there?"
"yeah, you bought that from pussy money?"
"No, I would have bought that from pussy money if I had a pussy" |
made from neon
Salute You in Your Grave
Age: 29
Gender: Female
Posts: 2036 | July 13th, 2009 at 07:09pm HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA I LOL'D FANTASTICALLY HARD! THAT'S GREAT!!!
and so this isn't spam,
a man is driving along a highway, and he sees another man shagging a sheep. he is enraged, so he drives up to the farmhouse near the sheep-shagger, goes up to it, rings the doorbell, and a little boy answers the door. the man says, "does your father farm sheep?"
the little boy answers, "yes, sir."
the man says, "well i'd like to have a word with him."
the boy says, "sure thing! da-a-a-ad!"
(same effect?)
|
Go fuck yourself
Devil's Got Your Number
Age: 30
Gender: Female
Posts: 37823 | July 15th, 2009 at 02:46am haha, yeah I laughed at that one.
A man walks into a sex shop to buy a blow-up doll. He goes up to the desk and asks the women behind it, "can I get a blow up doll?"
"sure, but I need to ask you some questions first"
"alright"
"do you want your doll to be white or black?"
"it doesn't matter"
"do you want her to be tall or short?"
"it doesn't matter"
"ok, final question, do you want her to be Christian or Muslem?"
"whats the difference?"
"the muslem doll blows herself up"
I offically have way to many distrubed friends. |
Silence is the Enemy
Killjoy
Age: 28
Gender: Female
Posts: 27 | July 21st, 2009 at 04:28pm i'm from the UK and i know what persil is |
Little Miss Mental
Bleeding on the Floor
Age: 32
Gender: Female
Posts: 1883 | July 21st, 2009 at 05:31pm Ok I got a few (they're lesbian jokes)
What do you call a lesbian eskimo?
A klondyke
What do you call a closet full of lesbians?
A licker cabinet
What do you get when you have 50 politicians and 50 lesbians all in the same room?
100 people who don't do dick
What's the difference between a lesbian and a dyke?
About $30,000. |
Little Miss Mental
Bleeding on the Floor
Age: 32
Gender: Female
Posts: 1883 | July 22nd, 2009 at 04:32pm |
IceHog69
Bulletproof Heart
Age: 31
Gender: -
Posts: 25232 | July 24th, 2009 at 04:36pm what do lawyers and sperm have in common?
both have a one in 50million chance of becoming a human being. |
