Cheating
| Author | Message |
|---|---|
| MistressRhi Motor Baby  Age: 40 Gender: Female Posts: 991 | What effects might cheating have on a persons next relationship? Cheater - they may do it again and hurt the next person as well, going along never finding true happiness cheatee - they may not go for any relationships for fear that they will get hurt again, or they may ruin the next one due to suspicion and fear that it will happen again it really depends on how the particular people take to the problem Is cheating acceptable under different circumstances, and if so, what are those circumstances that make it ok? i dont think cheating is acceptable under any circumstances but i dont think that it will ever change anyway, people are going to cheat because they want to. How often do you think that cheating is responsible for a break-up? wow probably lots of times, i think under these circumstances people cheat because they want the new attention and they are either too soft or too lazy to break up with their current partner Can seeing promiscuous behavior from a parent/guardian/tellivision program as a child make you more likely to cheat as an adult? hmm thats a difficult one, because children can be swayed either way but i think as grown up people we make our own choices. Some may see their parents doing it and think it's acceptable and some may think - god i never want to do that i never want to be like mum/dad etc. Is cheating more or less frequent than it was 50 years ago? What could have contributed to this? hmm another difficult one - i think perhaps there are more instances of it now because we have more freedom and it's not frowned upon as hard as it used to be, i think there is a lot less respect for other human beings now than there was 50 years ago. Sure people were cheating 50 years ago, its not a new thing, but it was very unheard of back then, now it happens all the time and it's well publisied. |
| china white Killjoy  Age: 43 Gender: Female Posts: 12 | Cheating can be the cause of suicide even...I think...My bf cheated on me after 9 YEARS...I feel like my life as I knew it is over....But maybe just a new beginning I guess.....It REALLY hurts tho...Especially when the bf is 30 and the bitch he cheated with is 16......And I am NO dog....I'm pretty hot if I do say so myself....  |
| xxkatiexx Killjoy Age: 31 Gender: Female Posts: 26 | God, cheaters need a kick up the a$$...i left my bofriend because he cheated...it aint nice... |
| Tanya1979 Fabulous Killjoy Age: 45 Gender: Female Posts: 174 | I think cheating should never be a issue when you are with somebody. But at times that does happen. If you love and respect somebody, you should never resort to cheating, ever. But there are also times when it is a cry for help. If say the guy cheats and his reason is that he is not happy, 9 out of 10 times, he isn't happy. Rather than tell their partner, they cheat. I still think that it is a sheepish act to do. But if he/she is so unhappy that they resort to do such things, maybe the couple need to talk stuff out, get away from eachother for a bit and maybe seek professonal help. There can still be a chance to improve the relationship, even after the cheating. I have been cheated on for close to 3 months, after 9 years together. We are now working stuff out with eachother. But he is taking full blame and wishes that he can change back time and tell he how he felt rather than to cheat. |
| ILuvMCRandYotas Motor Baby  Age: 41 Gender: Female Posts: 864 | I think cheating is just fuckered up. Yes, we've all been tempted at some point. However, if you're unhappy in a relationship, just end it. If somebody really cares for somebody else, they wouldn't cheat. (at least that's my opinion) |
| Tanya1979 Fabulous Killjoy Age: 45 Gender: Female Posts: 174 | I guess it's easier said than done. I dunno. I don't cheat, i could never bring myself to do that to anyone ever. I see how/why some people cheat The guy is having problems and he wants to escape from it all. So....he turns to a friend/co-worker, neighbour, stranger, whoever he chooses, then he pretty much fucks her. Some guys don't really want to hurt their girlfriends, but some also don't think right either, some. I never said all. Instead of breaking up and just turning to somebody else, they go to the other girl to talk about problems and what not, then one thing leads to another and bam, Who's to say that he meant for it to happen? Some guys don't see the big picture like us girls do. Some guys can not sense that he will cheat until he is naked, pretty much. Well, that's the way I see it. In other words, some guys don't plan to cheat, they go to talk and then it just happens. |
| Mrs.Sanchez Killjoy Age: 32 Gender: Female Posts: 16 | well cheating is a wrong thing to do who cares who does it first its wrong dont do it |
| bloodredruby69 Banned  Age: 35 Gender: Female Posts: 8293 | Peronally, I think that monogomy is fine, if that is what you both want. If you want to swing, power to you. Sex is only sex. As long as there is protection, then there shouldn't be a problem. And if there were more communication between couples today, cheating could be almost eliminated, as the understanding and openness of relationships would be better seen, and more emphasis would be put on emotional relationships. |
| Smashed Pumpkin Salute You in Your Grave  Age: 33 Gender: Female Posts: 2961 | Some people are insecure about themselves so cheat with numerous people to make themselves feel loved. Some just don't have any respect for their bf/gf. Some just make horrible mistakes and regret it later. |
| Tanya1979 Fabulous Killjoy Age: 45 Gender: Female Posts: 174 | If somebody loved their bf/gf, then why would they feel so insecure? Some people don't feel loved, even if they are in a relationship. Cheating isn't ok, but if the couple wants a open relationship, then fine. I personally don't think sex is just sex. I am old enought to know better and I am old enough to know what relationships are all about. Apparently some don't. (I am not talking about you guys here, I mean from people that I know on a personal level) I think if people regard sex as just being sex, should stay off of the relationship scene, so to speak. |
| windinyourhair Jazz Hands  Age: 35 Gender: Female Posts: 391 | I think that cheating should not be permitted at all. this is something that I am strongly against. my best friend had the perfect family, perfect father with the perfect marriage, perfect 2 little boys, and when the father took my friend to woodstock in 2000 I think? he brought a mistress, and for 3 years my friend was sworn to secrecy. and when his mom found out, it was just terrible. after that, I have no respect for his father, and no respect for anyone who cheats on someone. if you love someone, stay committed to them. especially in marriage. those vows were taken for a reason. and if you have the nerve to break them, then either get help or get a divorce before you go playing around. it's just not right. |
| bloodredruby69 Banned Age: 35 Gender: Female Posts: 8293 | Tanya1979: But sex is only one part of a relationship. If both parties involved are clear on what they want, both with themselves and with their partners, than sex really is only sex. It is a brief physical act, nothing more. Why should it get in the way of a healthy relationship, when it is one of the most elimental and human acts in practice today? I'm not saying go and screw a different person each night, or recklassly have sex. But if it is just scratching an itch, and your heart remains true to your parner, then I really see nothing wrong with it. Honesty is the key to functionality. Talk about it, allow for accidental or unforseen circumstances, and know that the other person values you more as a person and a mate, and your relationship should be able to survive "cheating". |
| HeartShaped--Glasses Killjoy Age: - Gender: Female Posts: 52 | Cheating is wrong but at the same time its a lot easier than breaking someone's heart.I've known of people who have gone into a relationship hoping to move on from someone they have loved for a long time but cannot fully commit to the realtionship because of their love for another person.I think that if you truly love the person you are cheating with it is not as heartbreaking.having a random one night stand is just wrong!!!! |
| Tanya1979 Fabulous Killjoy Age: 45 Gender: Female Posts: 174 | bloodredruby69: As I stated above somewhere in one of my other posts. Open relationship are fine, as long of both parties agree. Noone can have their cake and eat it too, otherwise they will just choke. Sex is just sex if you do not want to be in full committed relationship. For a full committed relationship, both involved should be just involved with eachother, noone else. That is where I speak of open relationships again. Open ones are good too. If you can be trustful about who you are screwing then yeah. But if you want a full committed one then you shouldn't even be thinking of open ones. But that is up to each person involved. I hope that this made some sense, hehe. In otherwrods, the way my eyes see it. Anyone can have a open relationship, they are nothing like full blown committed ones. |
| bloodredruby69 Banned Age: 35 Gender: Female Posts: 8293 | Personally, I think open relationships are more meaningful than "committed" ones. It means that you trust and cherish your partner enough to let them do as they please, and they do the same for you. Open relationships have no less committment in them than closed ones, you are still emotionally tied to the person you are with. You just are free to have sex with others as well. But then, in the post you quoted, I wasn't speaking of open relationships, per say. I was making a reference to the importance of a strong bond between the people. If there is a strong bond emotionally, then occasional deviations shouldn't really matter. As long as they talk it out and understand what happened and why, and that it was only physical, then their relationship should be able to survive unscathed. But then, for some reason, sex is put on such a high pedestal these days, that it really is considered to be more important than it really is. |
| Tanya1979 Fabulous Killjoy Age: 45 Gender: Female Posts: 174 | But then, for some reason, sex is put on such a high pedestal these days, that it really is considered to be more important than it really is.......Yeah it is actually. I'm not sure if **I** feel that open ones are more meaningful than committed ones. If you do, that's fine too. I said way above somewhere in one of my posts, not sure which one tho. That I personally have no problem about open relationships, only if both partners involved feel the same way. But I get the feeling that you are making it seem like I meant the opposite. I sm not sure if it was intended tho. |
| bloodredruby69 Banned Age: 35 Gender: Female Posts: 8293 | No, we've covered the open relationship bit and I understand what you mean.I'm not sure, though, if you understand my post. I wasn't even on the topic of open relationships in my first post, and the second half of my last one wasn't either. I'm trying to steer away from open relationships, because they don't constitute as cheating. I was saying that more emphasis should be put on the emotional aspects of a relationship, rather than on physical. Physicallity is nothing, really. It's the emotional part that really matters in a relationship, and if a couple can understand that, then cheating shouldn't be a problem, even if accidents happen from time to time. |
| Tanya1979 Fabulous Killjoy Age: 45 Gender: Female Posts: 174 | I completely agree with the second paragraph, open relationships is not cheating, I am not sure if you thought that I meant the opposite of that. Maybe I just overlooked something. I understand your post. Hon. Just kind of looked like you thought I meant open relationships were not right, which I am all for. Talk about misunderstanding. |
| MistressRhi Motor Baby Age: 40 Gender: Female Posts: 991 | Ruby - you were talking about honesty in relationships and how that could rule out cheating altogether i just want to know how this could work if both were honest but one person wanted an open relationship and the other was dead against it? Without them splitting up do you see any other ways around it? I'm just curious because in some cases like this wouldnt this lead to cheating because one person wants it but the other won't give it? Do you think that there is a way to make both happy? |
| xXDr. KrazyXx Fabulous Killjoy Age: 31 Gender: Female Posts: 120 | I think cheating is pointless. It is not disrespectful, it is degrating. Knowing you cheated, do you think anyone is going to want you? It lowers your relationship values. Also, it hurts people in irreversable ways. I've found that I was someone's 'chick on the side' without knowing it. When I found out, it broke my heart. I could only immagine what the other chick felt. It's a terrible situation to be in. |
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