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no face.
Awake and Unafraid
Age: 32
Gender: Female
Posts: 13483 | September 1st, 2008 at 09:43am
I think to a certain extent the "rant" earlier is true to some extent.
if they want to fit into society, why exclude yourselves?
My friend Tim hates being called gay because he wants to be normal even though he likes guys, (no he's not a spurr of the moment gay guy.) he doesn't want to be treated any different from us, and rightly so. There's nothing unusual about it and thats what this world is lacking.
Its not a disease, so it shouldn't be treated like one. It's someone's own choice, whether you believe people are "born" with it or not. They choose to live that lifestyle.
I think the whole "Gay Bar" thing is stupid honestly, its great to meet other people with your sexual orientation but I mean.
If you want to be accepted, why exclude the people you want to be accepted by 
This is like the same matter of racism honestly.
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Mindfuck
Always Born a Crime
Age: -
Gender: Female
Posts: 5614 | September 1st, 2008 at 10:07am Bert McCracken:I think the whole "Gay Bar" thing is stupid honestly, its great to meet other people with your sexual orientation but I mean.
If you want to be accepted, why exclude the people you want to be accepted by
What's so wrong with gay bars? I know you said it seems like gay people are "excluding" themselves by going to gay bars, but that's not really the purpose of a gay bar. Just because you might go to one it doesn't mean you want to be treated differently by society, it just means you want to hang around with other gay people. And there is nothing wrong with that.
And FYI, it's not as if gay bars are some secret club where you have to be gay to go. I know heaps of people, including myself, who are straight and have gone to one, or a few. They're just like any other nightclub but they draw a certain crowd, that's all.
They don't ask your sexual orientation at the door (or the ones I've been to don't anyway. But I can't imagine they'd do something like that). And they don't kick you out if you appear to be straight.
So really, I don't see why you're against gay bars. Both straight and gay people can attend them, or anyone of any other sexual orientation.
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Go fuck yourself
Devil's Got Your Number
Age: 30
Gender: Female
Posts: 37823 | September 1st, 2008 at 12:45pm ok, my thoughts on my friends rant.
The reason why people who are gay hold things like parades and go to gay bars is because, for one thing they want to meet other homosexual people and two because they want to give a face to homosexuality, say that you can't be homophobiac because it is such a large crowd. They want acceptance for being themself.
Homosexuality is really taboo to alot of people And a good portion of the people I know are agianst it, they look down at it and poeple who consider themselves as one. I've seen it and I've been through it. it is absouletly ridiculous to be harassed over it. It's not like because someone likes someone of the same sex that they'll be the downfall of the world. And yes, the church I'm forced to attend, the pastors wife and I talk quite abit and she says almost non-stop that the downfall of rome was due to homosexuality and our country is following the same path. I think that is absoultely ignorant. |
Chantal
Bleeding on the Floor
Age: 29
Gender: Female
Posts: 1015 | September 1st, 2008 at 01:23pm Hmmm my dad brought up an interesting topic earlier. We were having a discussion about things like acceptance, and he stated that accepting is different that embracing. His argument was that he accepts gay people the way they are, and he would never make fun of ,hassle,purposefully exclude, ect a gay person. However, he still believes it is a sin to be gay and therefor he does not support it or embrace it in others.
So I ask you, how do you feel about this? Can a person truly accept homosexuality while still having homophobic tendencies and having qualms about it?
My personal opinion is no. I believe accepting is more along the lines of not caring and to accept one's sexuality would be to believe it is fine to be that way. |
Go fuck yourself
Devil's Got Your Number
Age: 30
Gender: Female
Posts: 37823 | September 1st, 2008 at 05:23pm Yes;Indeed;True:Hmmm my dad brought up an interesting topic earlier. We were having a discussion about things like acceptance, and he stated that accepting is different that embracing. His argument was that he accepts gay people the way they are, and he would never make fun of ,hassle,purposefully exclude, ect a gay person. However, he still believes it is a sin to be gay and therefor he does not support it or embrace it in others.
So I ask you, how do you feel about this? Can a person truly accept homosexuality while still having homophobic tendencies and having qualms about it?
My personal opinion is no. I believe accepting is more along the lines of not caring and to accept one's sexuality would be to believe it is fine to be that way. I kinda agree with him, my dad is the same way, he doesnt make fun with them, he can live with them as a person, but he just doesn't find it at all moral who they sleep with. My dad isn't homophobic, in fact he is one of the most open minded and smartest indivuals I know. He has alot of freinds that are gay, and he's fine with them, he just doesn;t support it fully.
Accepting is different from supporting |
Rexperience
Bleeding on the Floor
Age: 32
Gender: Male
Posts: 1052 | September 1st, 2008 at 08:46pm My Dear Delirious: I kinda agree with him, my dad is the same way, he doesnt make fun with them, he can live with them as a person, but he just doesn't find it at all moral who they sleep with. My dad isn't homophobic, in fact he is one of the most open minded and smartest indivuals I know. He has alot of freinds that are gay, and he's fine with them, he just doesn;t support it fully.
Accepting is different from supporting
Interesting, that sheds some new insight for me on figuring out some of my friends. One guy I know was in the musical with me. We both were at very least associated with gay guys, especially our flamingly gay dance coordinator. After having fun with the cast at parties and learning a ton about dancing, I was shocked to see he was against Gay Marriage. I guess he must share similar thoughts as your dad. So basically it’s accepting that some people chose to live “sinful” lives. Well that at least seams like a step in the right direction.
Sorry, this is a bit backlogged, but I still wanted to give my response:
Bob.:I completely agree. I think that everyone's a little gay, but not everyone accepts that part of themselves.
How so, as in everyone has some sexual attraction for there same gender? Well I’d have to disagree. I’m a different person, I’m in theatre, take Art and can be quite sensitive, but I know inside myself that I am straight through and through. I have a number of good friends how happen to be gay, and I love them as friends, but have never been able for a second to think romantically of them. Its not who I am, if I felt different, I would accept it, but I don’t.
Bob.:It's cool to be different now. It's not cool to be homophobic (thank god!) or to be exactly the same as everyone. Not where I’m from. People pretty much tolerate difference, but there’s still a lot of homophobia. I’ve always been viewed as weird cause I have gay friends and stick up for them when they aren’t around. |
Faye Merci
Salute You in Your Grave
Age: -
Gender: -
Posts: 4473 | September 2nd, 2008 at 08:32pm KingRex:How so, as in everyone has some sexual attraction for there same gender? Well I’d have to disagree. I’m a different person, I’m in theatre, take Art and can be quite sensitive, but I know inside myself that I am straight through and through. I have a number of good friends how happen to be gay, and I love them as friends, but have never been able for a second to think romantically of them. Its not who I am, if I felt different, I would accept it, but I don’t.
It's about the scale of sexuality, with gay on one end and bi on the other.
Gay --------------|----------------Bi---------------|--------------Straight
Because most people actually really are a bit gay or bi. For instance, over half of all men who watch porn experience "penile plethysmograph", aka, enjoying seeing a woman have sex with a man, indicating that to an extension, they enjoy seeing a man have sex. And many women experience pleasure thinking of the "perfect" female figure. If you were completely straight, there would probably be no attraction to female or feminine features in you mind. |
Mindfuck
Always Born a Crime
Age: -
Gender: Female
Posts: 5614 | September 2nd, 2008 at 08:55pm Faye Merci:It's about the scale of sexuality, with gay on one end and bi on the other.
Gay --------------|----------------Bi---------------|--------------Straight
Because most people actually really are a bit gay or bi. For instance, over half of all men who watch porn experience "penile plethysmograph", aka, enjoying seeing a woman have sex with a man, indicating that to an extension, they enjoy seeing a man have sex. And many women experience pleasure thinking of the "perfect" female figure. If you were completely straight, there would probably be no attraction to female or feminine features in you mind. That continuum is just one theory about sexuality. That doesn't mean it is necessarily true. For the most part I agree with that theory, but I'm just playing devil's advocate when I say it's not the only one.
Just because a man might get turned on watching a man and a woman have sex in porn, it doesn't mean he is "a little bit bi or gay". He could be. But he doesn't have to be. Have you considered that perhaps some men fantasize about being in the male pornstar's position? Maybe that is why some men get turned on by it. They may not necessarily get turned on by the sight of a naked male pornstar, but just the thought of being the male pornstar. Just another perspective I'm throwing out there.
And as for women, wanting to look like a certain woman, or a certain type of woman doesn't mean you get sexually aroused by her or them. The pleasure a lot of women get from thinking about being a certain way doesn't have to mean they are getting off on it, or wanting to have sex with women (necessarily). |
Rexperience
Bleeding on the Floor
Age: 32
Gender: Male
Posts: 1052 | September 3rd, 2008 at 05:01pm Faye Merci:Because most people actually really are a bit gay or bi. For instance, over half of all men who watch porn experience "penile plethysmograph", aka, enjoying seeing a woman have sex with a man, indicating that to an extension, they enjoy seeing a man have sex. And many women experience pleasure thinking of the "perfect" female figure. If you were completely straight, there would probably be no attraction to female or feminine features in you mind.
Hugh Wa? Wanting to see chicks having sex is my idea of straight. As Mindfuck said, a big part of it is feeling like you are the guy, not that your watching the guy. I never appreciate it when the camera is focused on the dude, why would I wan to see that?
So if I was "completly" straight, I'd feel NO attraction what so ever for anyone? It was always my understanding that straight meant you like chicks, gay meant you like dudes and bi is a degree somewhere in between. All I can say is I can not logically think of any senario wear I willingly and cohearly have sex with another guy. Just being honest ~ Rex |
XmychildishromanceX
Killjoy
Age: 28
Gender: Female
Posts: 13 | September 4th, 2008 at 02:58am well what i want to know is any a homophobe? I am definatly not (if i was, i would be scared of half my friends!!!)
i don't think there is anything wrong with anyone being gay, lesbian, homosexual bisexual, etc. i don't have much a say on bi-curious. not meaning to say i have somethign against it. i am just not sure what it would be for a bi-curious. you should either decide to be straight or bi/homosexual. like, what if something came up that somebody of the same sex asked them out or something. idk just kinda wondering.
well, i don't have much to say... oh well. goodbye people. |
Faye Merci
Salute You in Your Grave
Age: -
Gender: -
Posts: 4473 | September 6th, 2008 at 01:22am KingRex:So if I was "completly" straight, I'd feel NO attraction what so ever for anyone? It was always my understanding that straight meant you like chicks, gay meant you like dudes and bi is a degree somewhere in between. All I can say is I can not logically think of any senario wear I willingly and cohearly have sex with another guy. Just being honest ~ Rex
I was talking to a female referring to the final thing, so if I were replying to you, I guess I would have said masculine, rather than feminine.
Why is it so impossible for people to think that if there's something between gay and straight, why can't there be something between bi and straight - and bi and gay? Things aren't ever all black and white. |
Rexperience
Bleeding on the Floor
Age: 32
Gender: Male
Posts: 1052 | September 6th, 2008 at 11:18pm Ah I get it now.
Faye Merci: And many women experience pleasure thinking of the "perfect" female figure. If you were completely straight, there would probably be no attraction to female or feminine features in you mind.
The "you" in the last sentance confused me.
I never said its all black and white. I'm sure there are many levels of bi-sexuality. I know a few guys who are straight yet admit that they could see sleeping with a man if they were drunk. I'll bet that most guys aren't truly honest with themselves, but I've put thought into it and have had to come to the conclusion that I ain't gay to any noticable degree. |
Faye Merci
Salute You in Your Grave
Age: -
Gender: -
Posts: 4473 | September 7th, 2008 at 01:36am KingRex:Ah I get it now. The "you" in the last sentance confused me.
I never said its all black and white. I'm sure there are many levels of bi-sexuality. I know a few guys who are straight yet admit that they could see sleeping with a man if they were drunk. I'll bet that most guys aren't truly honest with themselves, but I've put thought into it and have had to come to the conclusion that I ain't gay to any noticable degree.
Why would they have to get drunk? Why is it that someone like Katy Perry can write a song called "I Kissed A Girl" and sell millions but if a man like Justin Timberlake wrote a song called "I Kissed A Guy" his career would be over? Why is it that women can have lesbian sex experiences but not be bi, but a guy has to be drunk and bi?
I just don't get the sexism that comes with homosexuality. If you really want to accept people for who they are, then I think that involves a lot of self-introspection and admitting that everyone's mentality is fucked, not just our laws.
I notice people were complaining about gay bars. What's so awful about having a place to hang out where you're probably going to find people like you? My aunt goes to country-western bars all the time and I promise you, they might as well be called "straight-bars" with all the conservatives packed into those places. If straight bars can exist, why not gay bars? It's not like you can't go in one if you're straight. Lots of people go to gay bars for fun or to get a drink, not just to hook up with other people. (Whoa, almost like...a normal bar...just with gay people instead...) It's not excluding the people you want to be accepted by, because anyone can come and hang out in homosexual areas. However, can a gay man just walk into a predominately conservative straight area and feel as welcome? Meanwhile, you can go to a gay bar if you're straight or gay or bi or somewhere in-between, and you won't get kicked out or rudely treated.
Also, to the person who said accepting is different than supporting. What if I told every heterosexual that I don't "find it at all moral who they sleep with"? What if I believed that heterosexuality was wrong according to my god, so I told every straight person I met that while I wouldn't ostracize them, I still did not support or embrace their choices? Wouldn't that still hurt? That stings of equal-but-different, if you ask me. |
Aviendia
Killjoy
Age: 31
Gender: Female
Posts: 9 | September 7th, 2008 at 05:36pm Hey I'll admit I'm bisexual and the kids at school poke fun at me and shie away like it IS a disease. It hurts. If I went into a straight bar and tried to just have fun I'd be ill-at ease. I'd walk out sober and find the nearest gay bar and get hammered. Weather you accept me or not I am what I am. F' all that crap on gays have no right to live. My own mother doesn't accept me.THAT hurts. My sister's always been on my side. I'm not a spur of the moment bi chick either. I've been staring at girls since I was 7 and not just because they were pretty. At 13 I realized......I like girls and guys. I told my mom, and she yelled at me, shipped me to my uncles house and I lived in san diego for a while. He kicked me out too. So I live with my aunt who doesn't like it but doesn't dispute my choices in the matter. It's hard being what I am but you can't change me either way. And I won't change. Regardless of what you say. I am what I am. |
Aviendia
Killjoy
Age: 31
Gender: Female
Posts: 9 | September 7th, 2008 at 05:39pm [/quote]Also, to the person who said accepting is different than supporting. What if I told every heterosexual that I don't "find it at all moral who they sleep with"? What if I believed that heterosexuality was wrong according to my god, so I told every straight person I met that while I wouldn't ostracize them, I still did not support or embrace their choices? Wouldn't that still hurt? That stings of equal-but-different, if you ask me.[/quote]
Yea it would hurt. Some people don't get that so they say it anyway. It's disgusting, if you ask me. Your bloody brilliant, imho.  |
blow
Bleeding on the Floor
Age: -
Gender: Female
Posts: 1137 | September 7th, 2008 at 08:35pm Faye Merci:Also, to the person who said accepting is different than supporting. What if I told every heterosexual that I don't "find it at all moral who they sleep with"? What if I believed that heterosexuality was wrong according to my god, so I told every straight person I met that while I wouldn't ostracize them, I still did not support or embrace their choices? Wouldn't that still hurt? That stings of equal-but-different, if you ask me.
I'd rather someone accept it even if they don't like it, then be actively not supporting it. People I know do things all the time that I don't support, but I accept that it's they're choice to do what they want, and I still love them.
You can't force people to support and embrace something that they don't like, that would be wrong, but people who do believe those things need to just accept that that's the way it is.
Aviendia:Yea it would hurt. Some people don't get that so they say it anyway. It's disgusting, if you ask me. Your bloody brilliant, imho.
You said that you're mother openly hated you for your bisexuality, but that your aunt accepted it, but didn't like it. I would think that your aunt not liking it may be hurtful, but not nearly so much as your mother's actions. |
Person0001
Always Born a Crime
Age: 43
Gender: Female
Posts: 5099 | September 19th, 2008 at 10:29am Yes;Indeed;True:Can a person truly accept homosexuality while still having homophobic tendencies and having qualms about it?
I don't think so, no, but perhaps they can learn true tolerance, even if they're older. My adopted daughter's mom (I know, that sounds confusing - I "adopt" kids as my own in my heart even though they have homes LOL) changed her attitude on homosexuality when she fell in love with her daughter's homosexual best friend. Her love for that child successfully altered her view 
XmychildishromanceX:i am just not sure what it would be for a bi-curious. you should either decide to be straight or bi/homosexual. Well first of all, I don't believe you HAVE a choice; you are what you are, but that being said, bi-curious is what probably most of us are. It's just what it sounds like: you're curious about what it would be like to be intimate with your own gender, that's all.
Faye Merci:What if I told every heterosexual that I don't "find it at all moral who they sleep with"? What if I believed that heterosexuality was wrong according to my god, so I told every straight person I met that while I wouldn't ostracize them, I still did not support or embrace their choices? Wouldn't that still hurt? That stings of equal-but-different, if you ask me. I fucking love you for posting that  Fucking pwnage!! |
Kaleidoscopic mind
Thinking Happy Thoughts
Age: 43
Gender: Female
Posts: 411 | September 19th, 2008 at 11:50am About the whole gay bar thing... it's not just about being somewhere where you're not different or somewhere where people are not judgmental..
It's also, at least for many girls, a huge relief not having to get hit on by men every time they go out, and I'm sure that's the same for men not having to get hit on by women..
And also, if you're in a gay bar, if you see someone you like and want to talk to, the chances of having that person liking you back or responding positively towards you, are a LOT bigger than in a "straight" bar where you'd probably never even dare to talk to that person, thinking that he or she is very straight. |
whateva
Killjoy
Age: -
Gender: -
Posts: 19 | October 30th, 2008 at 05:13am Eponine:As the majority of humans are heterosexual I tend think that homosexuality is a mutation in some gene, keep in mind that is from a purely scientific view of it. Do I think there is anything wrong with it? No. It's a kind of mutation like having an oddly shaped birth mark, or having different colored eyes. (I'm not sure if different colored eyes are a mutation or a result of shared dominancy)
There's scientific evidence that there is no "gay gene" or variant alleles involved. However, it is an inherited trait or more a personality trait one is born with. In other words, being that that it is not a mutation it is not a disease or condition that can be cured or something we can locate and splice out of genes to prevent it. |
whateva
Killjoy
Age: -
Gender: -
Posts: 19 | October 30th, 2008 at 05:28am Eponine:That's what I mean. It's not a bad thing. Different is good.
But not only would you have two parents of the same sex you would also have to deal with other people's prejudices. Which would be hard for a young child to handle.
Honestly, it's not that hard. There are hundreds of thousands of us around the world and we're called "queerspawns" just so you know. We grow up just fine, a bit different in that we tend to have larger extended families made up of both parents families and other queerspawn families if you live in a neighborhood/community with a sizeable community. We also tend to be much more tolerant and open (not to generalize too much but that's my experience being an adult now who serves as a rolemodel for younger queerspawns).
And as for the resenting your parents thing mentioned by someone else. I don't see what there is to resent. And dealing with other people's prejudices is just something you learn to deal with and pick your battles. Most LGBTQ parents are very conscious of putting their kids in communities/schools/after school programs like COLAGE where they're around other families like their own so we tend to grow up just fine and well adjusted. I'm not saying it's all peachy(we live in a world full of prejudices) but it's not as wierd and stressful or detrimental as a lot of people seem to assume. |
