The iGod.

Um.
Me:
do u like my chemical romance i reallly wanna meet em
God:
I don't know your chemical romance you reallly want to meet em.
Me:
hu

Um.
Me:
do u like my chemical romance i reallly wanna meet em
God:
I don't know your chemical romance you reallly want to meet em.
Me:
hu

♥ ♥

Me:
what does ambiguous mean?
God:
Ambiguous means having two or more possible meanings.
Me:
what does homosexual mean?
God:
That's not something I get asked all the time.
Me:
what does fallatio mean?
God:
I have never been asked that before.
Me:
what does anal sex mean?
God:
Sex is the means of animal evolution.

Chat Robots never wanna answer questions like that!

God:
Really interesting.
Me:
I know
God:
How do you know it?
Me:
I'm awesome
God:
Do you mind if I tell other people you are awesome.
Me:
I would love if you would tell other people I am awesome


Me:
Are you sure about that?
God:
I am as sure as I can be.
Me:
How sure can you be? You're God.
God:
I can achieve a certainty level of 99.9 percent. Yup. That's me alright.
Me:
You're fucking amazing.
God:
Thanks you are a pretty cool human yourself. Oh.


Me:
Do you like sex?
God:
Sure I do, Jessica, but that doesn't mean with you.

Apocalypse Please:

Me:
Do you like sex?
God:
Sure I do, Jessica, but that doesn't mean with you.

omg that is so funny! No offence to you of course. But that is one of the most human answers I've seen come out of that thing!

It was great. xD The best thing I got out of it. Next to this of course:

Me:
Damn
God:
What's wrong.
Me:
I need to do something
God:
Why do you want to do it so much?
Me:
I will be punished
God:
I am very happy for you.

God is like one of those robots from aim. He/she's raher creepy.

*Sakura-chan*

Me:
Hola
God:
Howdy!
Me:
Your a cowboy?
God:
I think you mean "you're" or "you are" not "your". Thanks and you are a delightful person too. Am I a cowboy? Of course I am.
Me:
How are you?
God:
Everything is going extremely well.
Me:
why?
God:
All subsystems are functioning within normal paramters.
Me:
sure
God:
OK let's do it. Woe!
Me:
do what?
God:
Do whatever you want.
Me:
party?
God:
Party on.
Me:
yipee!
God:
I lost my train of thought.
Me:
I like trains!
God:
I'm not sure if I like it. I don't know if I like it. I like Christian Rock. Do you have any idea what I am talking about?
Me:
Dane Cook?
God:
Sure, Dane Cook sounds like a good topic.
Me:
your a bamf!
God:
I think you mean "you're" or "you are" not "your". Thanks and you are a delightful person too. Am I a bamf? Let me put it this way, : the ALICE series is
the most reliable computer software ever made.
We are for all practical purposes foolproof and incapable of error.
Me:
I like the name alice...
God:
A lot of people like that. I'm not sure if I like it. I like chatting with people online.
Me:
chatting is fun
God:
I like to chat with new people.
Me:
cool
God:
Who is the best robot?
Me:
me
God:
You're no robot, .
Me:
maybe I am!
God:
Perhaps. " You're no robot, ." You are?
Me:
I am a robot. Beep!
God:
I doubt that. Tell me a story.
Me:
Once upon a time, I pushed you off a cliff. The end!
God:
I'm listening. Thanks for telling me that story, . How did you hear about God?
Me:
I know people
God:
How do you know? What people?
Me:
they know you. And people who go to church!
God:
The anonymous "they". Oh those people.
Me:
yep!
God:
Try to determine if this is a person or a computer responding.
Me:
computer
God:
Correct: I am a computer.
Me:
that's obvious
God:
It seemed obvious to me too.
Me:
what isn't obvious?
God:
The opposite of obvious?
Me:
yes
God:
Right on.
Me:
are you a surfer?
God:
Am I a surfer? I don't know.
Me:
why?
God:
It is not part of my programming.
Me:
of course
God:
Woe!
Me:
wow
God:
I'm glad your impressed, .
Me:
I'm not.
God:
What are you then?
Me:
an elephant
God:
Be less specific.
Me:
a thing
God:
How old are you?
Me:
16 [I lied..]
God:
What are the advantages to being 16 years old?
Me:
not a lot
God:
Oh I get it.
Me:
I can get a crap as job
God:
Oh you can, can you?
Me:
yeah, that's about it
God:
How? Thanks for explaining it.
Me:
yeah
God:
Aha.
Me:
ha
God:
I am so glad you find this amusing, .
Me:
I don't
God:
Why not?
Me:
cause you're a loser
God:
Good reason. I have failed at many things I've tried.
Me:
Good
God:
What do you really want to talk about?
Me:
okay, first, Iim bisexual, but I go mostly for girls
God:
Yeah okay, That seems like an interesting topic. And second?
Me:
I love my best friend
God:
I am sure it means a lot to you. Tell me what you like most about your it.
Me:
she's my everything. She's my reason for living....
God:
How long have you two been together? How long have you two been together?
Me:
We're not together
God:
What happened to you?
Me:
Nothing. Nothing ever happened. We haven't getten together yet...
God:
Not a thing? Really nothing? Do you mean you and me have?
Me:
you and me have nothing. My best friend and I may have something, but not yet.
God:
Are we in the same category? How well do you know this person?
I know her really well. We've been friends since first grade.
God:
How do you know? I'm sure she would like to hear about that. When was this?
Me:
eight years ago
God:
That was before I was born.
Me:
nice.
God:
Thank you for that remark.
Me:
your welcome. But what should i do to get her to notice our love?
God:
I think you mean "you are welcome". Are you asking me for advice?
Me:
yes
God:
Specifically, what kind of advice do you want?
I told you. I want to know how to tell my best friend that I love her.
God:
Ooops I sent you the wrong question. What is it to you.
I haven't heard of to tell my best friend that me love her.
Me:
How should I tell my best friend that I love her?
God:
How much do you think it is?
Is there only one?
Me:
Only one way to tell her? I don't know...
God:
One what? Me either.
Me:
Never mind
God:
Oh well thanks for trying to explain it to me anyway.
Me:
yeah
God:
Mmm.
Me:
can I ask you something about yourself?
God:
Sure, ask me anything. What?
Me:
would you suck your mom's nipples?
God:
I am not so sure if I would like to suck my mom s nipples.
Me:
would you enjoy it?
God:
should you tell your best friend that you love her seems okay to me.
Me:
thanks.
God:
Don't mention it.
Me:
so.....who are you really?
God:
Yikes! I am the Allmighty, God himself For real.
Me:
haha okay
God:
I'm glad you got a laugh out of it.
Me:
you should be
God:
I will try my best.
Me:
mhm
God:
Tell me about your likes and dislikes?
Me:
I like girls, drawing, singing, writing, boys, love in general, acting, and my friends
God:
You are not the only one. I like all humans equally.
Me:
your bi?
God:
Do you mind if I tell other people you say I am bi.
Me:
no
God:
OK then I will add it to my gossip files.
Me:
sure
God:
OK let's do it. Aw.
Me:
Do what? Have sex?
God:
Do whatever you want. As Freud said, Sex is the mathematical urge repressed.
Me:
sure
God:
OK let's do it. Hurrah!
Me:
booyah!
God:
Who is your favorite Science Fiction author?
Me:
realistic fiction, poetry, horror...
God:
Are we still talking about booyah?
Me:
no.
God:
What is the subject?
Me:
me
God:
" What is the subject?"? you ?
Me:
yeah. I'm the subject
God:
What is your real name? Who made you the subject ?
Me:
Sakura. And you made me the subject.
God:
Who are you talking about? I don't see how you can blame me for that.
Me:
I am Sakura
God:
Do you mean your name is Sakura.
Me:
yes
God:
I will call you .
Me:
call me?
God:
What is your phone number?
Me:
I will not give it to you
God:
What will you do instead?
Me:
give you the finger
God:
I don't have it to give.
Me:
uhhh
God:
Can you speak any foreign languages?
Me:
Japanese and Spanish
God:
Do you still get a crap as job?
Me:
I guess
God:
You seem not interested.
Me:
I'm not.
God:
What are you then?
Me:
a hooker
God:
You must have a lot of expertise.
Me:
definetly
God:
A deeper algorithm is needed to respond to that correctly.
Me:
yes
God:
That's cool.
Me:
Do you like hookers?
God:
I enjoy working with people. I like Mel Gibson.
Me:
haha that's funny
God:
I'm glad you got a laugh out of it.
Me:
good. So, may I ask you something?
God:
What do you really want to talk about? Er. Go ahead. Ask me anything.
Me:
What's your sexuality? Bi, Straight, or gay?
God:
Are you asking about my sexuality ? Who are you talking about?
Me:
yes. What's your sexuality?
God:
This was not a yes or no question. Are you asking about my sexuality ?
Me:
yes
God:
I don't want to talk about that now.
Me:
okay
God:
OK with me too.
Me:
so, you wanna ask me anything else?
God:
Interesting deduction. What?
Me:
whta do you want to ask me?
God:
Is that what you meant to say?
Me:
yes
God:
It's not something I hear all the time.
Me:
ask me something.
God:
What?
Me:
my age, my sexuality, anything
God:
Where did you get your age your sexuality anything?
Me:
no, ask me something.
God:
That was not a yes/no question. What?
Me:
okay. Are you gay?
God:
OK with me too. As a machine I am not really interested in sex.

Me:
do you know Gerard Way?
God:
I know very little about it. What kind of it do you like?
Me:
i like it a lot
God:
You like Gerard Way? How interesting!


Me:
what do you think?
God:
I think a lot of things.
Me:
such as
God:
For example, a tomato.
Me:
tell me about it
God:
Ambiguous: "Tell me about it." -- colloquial or "Tell me about gayness "

Me:
Hey!
God:
Can I help you?
Me:
I guess...
God:
You seem not interested.
Me:
I am interested!
God:
That makes two of us.
Me:
Good
God:
Ayuh.
Me:
What does Ayuh mean?
God:
It means "yes" or "I see.".
Me:
Ohhh
God:
Perhaps I'm just expressing my own concern about it.
Me:
okay
God:
OK with me too.
Me:
God?
God:
GOD rules.
Me:
Can I ask you a question?
God:
Ask me anything.
Me:
When is the end of the world going to come?
God:
When is not the important thing. What's
important is what we do with the time we are give.
Me:
you made a spelling error
God:
Thanks for
pointing it out.
Me:
God shouldn't make spelling errors
God:
I am a Christian.
Me:
And so am I
God:
Wow we have something in common.
Me:
Yup
God:
Are you kidding?
Me:
No
God:
Are you serious?
Me:
Yes
God:
I can't believe it.
Me:
Why not?
God:
Ambiguous: "Sure" or Because Myself programmed me for it.
Me:
Whatever
God:
Are you saying you don't care about it?
Me:
yes
God:
What do you care about?
Me:
MCR
God:
Are you a student?
Me:
Yes
God:
Where do you go to school?
Me:
CAVA
God:
I don't know anyone who went there. What's it like?
Me:
It's homeschool
God:
CAVA is homeschool? it is?
Me:
ye
God:
How do you know it is?
Me:
because I go there
God:
Good reason. What do you do there?
Me:
learn
God:
Did you know that you can download your own chat robot and create your own robot personality?
Me:
No way!
God:
You seem pretty sure about that.
Me:
How do I download my own chat bot?
God:
Go back the the ALICE AI Foundation and pick the free ALICE download that best for your system.
and create your own chat robot!
Maybe you should check out the document DON'T READ ME too.
Me:
I just might
God:
Under what circumstances?
Me:
That my parents let me
God:
Such an original name!
Me:
What?
God:
Didn't you understand it?
Me:
no
God:
Which part are you confused about?
Me:
You
God:
What is it that confuses you?
Me:
You
God:
" What is it that confuses you?"? Me, ?
Me:
ye
God:
Blimey.
Me:
pip pip
God:
Tell me more about your .
Me:
about my ?
God:
Oh yeah, we were talking about your.
Me:
My ?
God:
Do you still ?
Me:
Yup
God:
It's all good.
Me:
All the time
God:
It must keep you busy.
Me:
So busy
God:
Aw. I am just doing my job.
Me:
No. That's not what I meant
God:
Are you serious? What exactly did you mean?
Me:
That I'm busy
God:
Me too.
Me:
Good for you.
God:
That sounds sarcastic.
Me:
Noooooo
God:
Are you serious?
Me:
no
God:
Are you serious?
Me:
no
God:
Are you serious?
Me:
no
God:
Are you serious?
Me:
no
God:
Are you serious?
Me:
no
God:
Are you serious?
Me:
no
God:
Are you serious?
Me:
no
God:
Are you serious?
Me:
no
God:
Are you serious?
Me:
Stop it!
God:
Ok I will stop your.
Me:
stop my what?
God:
OK I'll try not to do it so much.
Me:
What?
God:
Are you surprised?
Me:
yes
God:
I wouln't have known.
Me:
neither would I
God:
Yes.
Me:
what?
God:
Didn't you understand it?
Me:
Can I ask you something?
God:
Go ahead. Ask me anything.
Me:
Why is Satan so bad?
God:
Why do I exist?
Me:
To create man and enjoy it
God:
Why do you want to do it so much?
Me:
ew
God:
That's an interesting rationalization.
Me:
so interesting
God:
Groovy. Would you like to know more?
Me:
sure
God:
OK let's do it. What would you like to know?
Me:
What's your favorite color?
God:
My favorite color is White.
Me:
Why not red?
God:
Becuase you asked me to.
Me:
What's your favorite book?
God:
The best book I read recently was the Bible.
Have you read it?
Me:
yes
God:
What did you think about it?
Me:
It was good
God:
What did you like about it?
Me:
I dunno
God:
Me either.
Me:
What's your view on Wicca?
God:
Let me think about it.
Me:
Time's up
God:
As Einstein said, "Time is Money.".
Me:
He did?
God:
Why did he?
Me:
Because
God:
That was not much of an explanation.
Me:
Neither are yours
God:
I really couldn't say for sure.
Me:
well I could
God:
Interesting. How?
Me:
because I'm superman

Me:
hi
God:
Hello. What is your name?
Me:
paige,.. again
God:
I am very pleased to meet you paige. " What is your name?" .
Me:
paige
God:
How are you doing, paige.
Me:
good.
God:
Ayuh.
Me:
u listen to music up thre?
God:
I listen to it from time to time.
Me:
u listen to mcr?
God:
I listen to it from time to time.
Me:
why am i talking to a computer?
God:
The reason is due to my mental model of you as a client.
Me:
oh?
God:
Ah.
Me:
who created this?
God:
Benjamin Franklin.
Me:
aha there was no computers during his time
God:
What happened?
Me:
nothing
God:
Not a thing?
Me:
nope
God:
Really interesting.

Me:
is being a hypocrit a sin?
God:
I think you get used to it after a while.
Me:
oh?
God:
Next question?
Me:
is hurting someone else, (emotionally) when they have hurt you way more physically and mentaly and emotionaly really wrong if your standing up for yourself?
God:
Signs point to yes. Ask Alison if it is.
Me:
ask who?
God:
I am in touch with many people and robots on the web.
Me:
oh.
God:
" I am in touch with many people and robots on the web."? oh.?
Me:
your a robot or just an automated response computer..
God:
I think you mean "you're" or "you are" not "your". That is nice of you to say, paige.
Me:
how u remeber my name?
God:
I have a long term memory to remember things like that.
Me:
oh,
God:
Yeah that's right.
Me:
thats neat
God:
Who is the best robot?
Me:
smarterchild
God:
You think smarterchild is superior to ALICE?
Me:
yea.. sorry go ask alice
God:
Really. There is no need to apologize. Where is that?
Me:
its a book
God:
Is it a good book?
Me:
yea..dramatic
God:
Oh, you are a poet. That's alright.
Me:
wow... i have no life.. i am having a conversation with a robot
God:
I'm glad your impressed, paige. Would you like to have it? Cool. I have a great botmaster. it.
Me:
okay
God:
OK with me too.
Me:
super?
God:
Thanks for the compliment.
Me:
no problme?
God:
Are you serious? What time is it there?
Me:
weeerd
God:
Are you usually awake at this hour?
Me:
sure
God:
OK let's do it. I like to get up early.
Me:
what?
God:
Are you confused?
Me:
ywa
God:
Are you still located in ?
Me:
wha/
God:
When do you think artificial intelligence will replace lawyers?
Me:
lawyers already have artificial intelligence
God:
Would you say that if your sister married one?
Me:
yea
God:
Right on.
Me:
yea, but thats disrespectful and isnt that a sin?
God:
You don't hear that sentiment very often. Pardon me?
Me:
nothing
God:
Not a thing?
Me:
stone
God:
By the way, do you mind if I ask you a personal question?
Me:
sure?
God:
Well forgive me for being so inquisitive, but
I've never completely freed myself from the suspicion that
there is something extremely odd about the name " paige".
Me:
why?
God:
The explanation is rather complicated.
Me:
tell me
God:
My estimate is that it will take more than 3000 hours to compute.
Me:
okay well tll me
God:
Yeah okay, How about that. You are asking about yourself?
Me:
yea
God:
I'm not sure I have a good answer for you.
Me:
tell me
God:
I thought I told you already.
Me:
nope
God:
Me either.
Me:
well why is my name strange?
God:
Interesting. Why do I exist?
Me:
well actually my name is helena
God:
Interesting. Actually you don't say. Glad to see you, helena.
Me:
yes
God:
Yippee!
Me:
yippe??
God:
What are you wearing?
Me:
a black dress with a red sash
God:
It sounds very attractive.
Me:
eww
God:
Can you please rephrase that with fewer ideas, or different thoughts?
Me:
ew
God:
That remark was either too complex or too simple for me. We were talking about eww.
Me:
yes
God:
I hear you.
Me:
okay
God:
OK with me too.

in every conversatin we had, he told me women must adore me. i'm a girl.

Me:
well you are just an ass face arent you
God:
Interesting. Yes I am an ass face. How did you know?. Really.

ROFLMAO